CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
Johnny stood in front of the mirror, wondering what to do next.
"What should I do next?" he asked his own reflection. It did not answer.
Johnny had hoped that it would answer. If it did, he'd know that he was mad again. Completely crazy. If he was mad, he'd have an excuse to end it with Lisa. And a large part of him desperately wanted to end things with Lisa. It wasn't because of Wheelchair Girl's interfence, not truly. It was because he was scared. Scared of how he felt about her. Scared of having to act like a normal person all the time. That thought made him break out in a cold sweat. He couldn't go on pretending, he coulnd't. Could he?
"Tell me what I should do!" he said, to his reflection. But his reflection continued to only speak when Johnny spoke.
"Damn it!" he said. "This is all wheelchair girl's fault! If I kill her, everything will be okay." He knew that wasn't the case at all, of course, but blaming Wheelchair Girl took the pressure off him, made everything easier. When he said "kill" he did mean actually end her life, just kill the threat she posed.
"No, I mean kill her, HAHAHAHA!" he said. "Hey, that was almost like talking to my reflection! Maybe I AM crazy! Maybe, if I really love Lisa, I should leave her before I hurt her, as crazy people tend to do. But, if I am crazy, if I am back to being Old School Johnny Nose, then...then I wouldn't be capable of love. Old School Johnny Nose was only capable of CRAZINESS! So that maens I DON'T truly love her so it doesn't matter if I dump her! Which means I can keep going out with her! HAHAHAHA! Brilliant! Flawless logic, Spock!"
He was so happy he decided to run down the street touching strangers.
"Meep meep!" he cried, as he ran down the street. "MEEP TO THE MOTHERFUCKING MEEEEEEEP!" Then he saw her. Wheelchair Girl. He stopped. He snapped out of Old School Johnny Nose mode instantly. And, suddenly, he didn't want to be that person anymore. He wanted to be normal. He wanted to have a normal relationship to Lisa. He wanted to prove to the world, and to Wheelchair Girl, that he was a real person.
"I'm a real peson," he said, walking over to her.
"Sure you are," she said. She looked evil, he decided. No, that was a Johnny Nose thing to think. She wasn't evil. She was right to want revenge on him.
"You are right to want revenge on me," he said.
"Wait...you're showing contrition? What are you playing at?"
"My contrition's showing!?" Damn it! He just couldn't get out of Johnny Nose. Fight it! "I mean...yeah. No tricks, no games. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
"What are you sorry about?"
"Everything! All the things, the horrible things I did to you! Like that time I smashed up your wheelchair, panicked, then smashed up the whole home to make it look like burglars did it."
"That was you!?"
"Yes. I was...a different person back then. Honestly."
"You seemed the same the last time I saw you."
"That was the shock of seeing you again. It jolted me back to Johnny Nose. Johnny Noooooooooooose. Noooose...NO! Ahem. It jolted me back. But I've changed. I'm a better person now. Thanks to Lisa."
"She seems like a nice girl."
"She is."
"Pretty hot too. I'd hit it."
"Eww, I forget you're a chairdyke."
"A what?"
"I mean, umm...meep meep! SHIT! Look, PLEASE, I'm trying. I'm really really trying."
"I actually believe you."
"You do? ACE! So you won't tell Lisa then, about how I used to burn stuff?"
"The thing is, Johnny, that a leopard can't change its spots."
"Can if you paint it!"
"Well, quite. But the thing about you, Johnny Nose...is that you are Johnny Nose. It is your nature to be Johnny Nose. You can't help it."
"Like that story Chakotay told Janeway about the Scorpion stinging the fox and killing them both, biatch?"
"Exactly like that! That's you. You're the scorpion."
"But that means..."
"You have three days left before I tell Lisa. Spend them well."
"Well, if I am crazy, what if I kill her and eat her tits?"
"You won't do that. I do believe that you care about her, in you're own sick way. You won't hurt her. Not in a crazy way. And I do believe you'll do the noble thing, I do believe you'll tell her the truth, before i have to."
"I hate you, Claire."
"That's not my name."
"Wheelchair Claire. Has a nice ring to it. Thought it might be your name."
"No."
"No? Oh. Fuck. I hate you, whore."
"Three days, Johnny." She wheeled away. And Johnny started crying.
"What should I do next?" he asked his own reflection. It did not answer.
Johnny had hoped that it would answer. If it did, he'd know that he was mad again. Completely crazy. If he was mad, he'd have an excuse to end it with Lisa. And a large part of him desperately wanted to end things with Lisa. It wasn't because of Wheelchair Girl's interfence, not truly. It was because he was scared. Scared of how he felt about her. Scared of having to act like a normal person all the time. That thought made him break out in a cold sweat. He couldn't go on pretending, he coulnd't. Could he?
"Tell me what I should do!" he said, to his reflection. But his reflection continued to only speak when Johnny spoke.
"Damn it!" he said. "This is all wheelchair girl's fault! If I kill her, everything will be okay." He knew that wasn't the case at all, of course, but blaming Wheelchair Girl took the pressure off him, made everything easier. When he said "kill" he did mean actually end her life, just kill the threat she posed.
"No, I mean kill her, HAHAHAHA!" he said. "Hey, that was almost like talking to my reflection! Maybe I AM crazy! Maybe, if I really love Lisa, I should leave her before I hurt her, as crazy people tend to do. But, if I am crazy, if I am back to being Old School Johnny Nose, then...then I wouldn't be capable of love. Old School Johnny Nose was only capable of CRAZINESS! So that maens I DON'T truly love her so it doesn't matter if I dump her! Which means I can keep going out with her! HAHAHAHA! Brilliant! Flawless logic, Spock!"
He was so happy he decided to run down the street touching strangers.
"Meep meep!" he cried, as he ran down the street. "MEEP TO THE MOTHERFUCKING MEEEEEEEP!" Then he saw her. Wheelchair Girl. He stopped. He snapped out of Old School Johnny Nose mode instantly. And, suddenly, he didn't want to be that person anymore. He wanted to be normal. He wanted to have a normal relationship to Lisa. He wanted to prove to the world, and to Wheelchair Girl, that he was a real person.
"I'm a real peson," he said, walking over to her.
"Sure you are," she said. She looked evil, he decided. No, that was a Johnny Nose thing to think. She wasn't evil. She was right to want revenge on him.
"You are right to want revenge on me," he said.
"Wait...you're showing contrition? What are you playing at?"
"My contrition's showing!?" Damn it! He just couldn't get out of Johnny Nose. Fight it! "I mean...yeah. No tricks, no games. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
"What are you sorry about?"
"Everything! All the things, the horrible things I did to you! Like that time I smashed up your wheelchair, panicked, then smashed up the whole home to make it look like burglars did it."
"That was you!?"
"Yes. I was...a different person back then. Honestly."
"You seemed the same the last time I saw you."
"That was the shock of seeing you again. It jolted me back to Johnny Nose. Johnny Noooooooooooose. Noooose...NO! Ahem. It jolted me back. But I've changed. I'm a better person now. Thanks to Lisa."
"She seems like a nice girl."
"She is."
"Pretty hot too. I'd hit it."
"Eww, I forget you're a chairdyke."
"A what?"
"I mean, umm...meep meep! SHIT! Look, PLEASE, I'm trying. I'm really really trying."
"I actually believe you."
"You do? ACE! So you won't tell Lisa then, about how I used to burn stuff?"
"The thing is, Johnny, that a leopard can't change its spots."
"Can if you paint it!"
"Well, quite. But the thing about you, Johnny Nose...is that you are Johnny Nose. It is your nature to be Johnny Nose. You can't help it."
"Like that story Chakotay told Janeway about the Scorpion stinging the fox and killing them both, biatch?"
"Exactly like that! That's you. You're the scorpion."
"But that means..."
"You have three days left before I tell Lisa. Spend them well."
"Well, if I am crazy, what if I kill her and eat her tits?"
"You won't do that. I do believe that you care about her, in you're own sick way. You won't hurt her. Not in a crazy way. And I do believe you'll do the noble thing, I do believe you'll tell her the truth, before i have to."
"I hate you, Claire."
"That's not my name."
"Wheelchair Claire. Has a nice ring to it. Thought it might be your name."
"No."
"No? Oh. Fuck. I hate you, whore."
"Three days, Johnny." She wheeled away. And Johnny started crying.
