Joke Thread (a thread for jokes)

[CaptainWacky]

Q: What was the relationship between J.R.R. Tolkien and C.S. Lewis?
A: Hobbitsexual!

Q: When Tolkien dropped a pen at Lewis's feet and bent over to pick it up, what did Lewis say to entice him into performing oral sex?
A: "Aslan you're down there..." (As long as you are down there (perform oral sex on me.))

 

[CaptainWacky]

Q: What did you get if you cross Simon Pegg with Wallace and Gromit?
A: Shaun the Dead Sheep!

Q: What is Simons Pegg's favourite LOTR character?
A: Peggolas!

 

[Seph]

Q. When can being stuck in traffic be more profitable than your day job?

A.When you're stuck in the middle of your huge international people trafficking ring laughing at how evil you are!

the funiest joke i ever heard LMFAO


:day:

 

[Seph]

Horse walks in to a bar

barman says why the long face.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Q: What does it mean when a woman has two black eyes?
A: It's fun to punch her, aight.

 

[Seph]

Q. Why did cave men drag their women by the hair?

A. Because if they dragged them by the ankles there cracks would get full of sand

 

[CaptainWacky]

Q: Diddy Kong Racing?
A: You bet her did!