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Make up stupid sayings...
- Thread starter Mentalist
- Start date
Ishcabittle
New member
Each man is master of his own soup.
starguard
Unluckiest Charm in the Box
Heres a whole bunch of them on different issues:
ON DEEP THOUGHTS
A day without sunshine is like night.
ON HIGHER EDUCATION
College is a fountain of knowledge...and the students are there to
drink.
ON MATHEMATICAL TRANSFORMS
A polar bear is a rectangular bear after a coordinate transform.
ON YOUTH
"Some people say that I must be a horrible person, but that's not true.
I have the heart of a young boy -- in a jar on my desk."
-- Steven King, 3/8/90
ON PROBLEM SOLVING
When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to
resemble a nail.
-- Abraham Maslow
ON MATERIALISM
He who dies with the most toys, is, nonetheless, still dead.
ON ECONOMICS
The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.
ON PUBLISHING OR PERISHING
I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone
has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top.
-- English Professor, Ohio University
ON REVISIONIST HISTORY
What was sliced bread the greatest thing since?
ON DATING
When aiming for the common denominator, be prepared for the occasional
division by zero.
ON LAMENTATION
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
ON POETIC LOVE
When you're swimmin' in the creek
And an eel bites your cheek
That's a Moray!
-- Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers
ON MODERNISM
Q: How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with
brightly colored machine tools.
ON MATERIAL SCIENCE
Character density: The number of very weird people in the office.
ON EXTINCTION
Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
ON HUMILITY
To err is human, to moo bovine.
ON EXPLANATION OF THE END
"... one of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that,
lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of
their C programs."
-- Robert Firth
ON PROPHECY
The meek shall inherit the earth---they are too weak to refuse.
ON NUMBERS
Grabel's Law: 2 is not equal to 3---not even for very large values of
2.
ON WORLD POLITICS
Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until you can find a rock.
AND FINALLY, ON DRUGS AND DEVELOPMENT
There are two major products to come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We
don't believe this to be a coincidence.
ON DEEP THOUGHTS
A day without sunshine is like night.
ON HIGHER EDUCATION
College is a fountain of knowledge...and the students are there to
drink.
ON MATHEMATICAL TRANSFORMS
A polar bear is a rectangular bear after a coordinate transform.
ON YOUTH
"Some people say that I must be a horrible person, but that's not true.
I have the heart of a young boy -- in a jar on my desk."
-- Steven King, 3/8/90
ON PROBLEM SOLVING
When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to
resemble a nail.
-- Abraham Maslow
ON MATERIALISM
He who dies with the most toys, is, nonetheless, still dead.
ON ECONOMICS
The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.
ON PUBLISHING OR PERISHING
I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone
has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top.
-- English Professor, Ohio University
ON REVISIONIST HISTORY
What was sliced bread the greatest thing since?
ON DATING
When aiming for the common denominator, be prepared for the occasional
division by zero.
ON LAMENTATION
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
ON POETIC LOVE
When you're swimmin' in the creek
And an eel bites your cheek
That's a Moray!
-- Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers
ON MODERNISM
Q: How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with
brightly colored machine tools.
ON MATERIAL SCIENCE
Character density: The number of very weird people in the office.
ON EXTINCTION
Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
ON HUMILITY
To err is human, to moo bovine.
ON EXPLANATION OF THE END
"... one of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that,
lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of
their C programs."
-- Robert Firth
ON PROPHECY
The meek shall inherit the earth---they are too weak to refuse.
ON NUMBERS
Grabel's Law: 2 is not equal to 3---not even for very large values of
2.
ON WORLD POLITICS
Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until you can find a rock.
AND FINALLY, ON DRUGS AND DEVELOPMENT
There are two major products to come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We
don't believe this to be a coincidence.
Blindgroping
U mad 'bro?
Lets see....
reference Bob dylan, Nietzsche, brady Bunch, the bible, and that guy on the corner.
"You know, only rolling stones can kill god for your family then the government is after you."
reference Bob dylan, Nietzsche, brady Bunch, the bible, and that guy on the corner.
"You know, only rolling stones can kill god for your family then the government is after you."
Sarek
Vuhlkansu Wihs
Come on, you can't have a stupid sayings topic without a word from the Commander in Stupidi... I mean Chief.
They misunderestimated me.
- US President George W. Bush (November 6, 2000 in Bentonville, Arkansas)
Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.
- US President George W. Bush (August 5, 2004)
You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test.
- US President George W. Bush (2000?)
Reading is the basics for all learning.
- US President George W. Bush (Discussing his "Reading First" plan in Reston, Virginia, March 28, 2000)
Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?
- US President George W. Bush (January 11, 2000)
My views are one that speaks to freedom.
- US President George W. Bush (in Washington, D.C. on Jan. 29, 2004)
And it's a struggle between good and it's a struggle between evil.
- US President George W. Bush in a speech (on terrorism) to the Cattle Industry Annual Convention and Trade Show at the Denver Convention Center (February 8, 2002)
We cannot let terrorists hold this nation hostile or hold our allies hostile.
- US President George W. Bush (2000 in Des Moines, Iowa)
Our nation must come together to unite.
- US President George W. Bush (June 4, 2001)
If you choose to do so, when Iraq is liberated, you will be treated, tried and persecuted as a war criminal.
- US President George W. Bush (In St. Louis on January 22, 2003, he likely meant 'prosecuted.' Just for the record Bill O'reilly made the same mistake on his TV show The O'reilly Factor in August 2004)
Will the highways on the Internet become more few?
- US President George W. Bush (Concord, New Hampshire, January 29, 2000)
If you don't stand for anything, you don't stand for anything!
- US President George W. Bush (November 2, 2000 at Bellevue Community College)
I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.
- US President George W. Bush (September 29, 2000 in Saginaw, Michigan)
I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family
- US President George W. Bush (January 27, 2000 in New Hampshire)
This very week in 1989, there were protests in East Berlin and in Leipzig. By the end of that year, every communist dictatorship in Central America had collapsed.
- US President George W. Bush (November 6, 2003 in Washington, D.C.)
Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream.
- US President George W. Bush (October 2000)
I think we agree, the past is over.
- US President George W. Bush (May 10, 2000)
They misunderestimated me.
- US President George W. Bush (November 6, 2000 in Bentonville, Arkansas)
Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.
- US President George W. Bush (August 5, 2004)
You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test.
- US President George W. Bush (2000?)
Reading is the basics for all learning.
- US President George W. Bush (Discussing his "Reading First" plan in Reston, Virginia, March 28, 2000)
Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?
- US President George W. Bush (January 11, 2000)
My views are one that speaks to freedom.
- US President George W. Bush (in Washington, D.C. on Jan. 29, 2004)
And it's a struggle between good and it's a struggle between evil.
- US President George W. Bush in a speech (on terrorism) to the Cattle Industry Annual Convention and Trade Show at the Denver Convention Center (February 8, 2002)
We cannot let terrorists hold this nation hostile or hold our allies hostile.
- US President George W. Bush (2000 in Des Moines, Iowa)
Our nation must come together to unite.
- US President George W. Bush (June 4, 2001)
If you choose to do so, when Iraq is liberated, you will be treated, tried and persecuted as a war criminal.
- US President George W. Bush (In St. Louis on January 22, 2003, he likely meant 'prosecuted.' Just for the record Bill O'reilly made the same mistake on his TV show The O'reilly Factor in August 2004)
Will the highways on the Internet become more few?
- US President George W. Bush (Concord, New Hampshire, January 29, 2000)
If you don't stand for anything, you don't stand for anything!
- US President George W. Bush (November 2, 2000 at Bellevue Community College)
I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.
- US President George W. Bush (September 29, 2000 in Saginaw, Michigan)
I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family
- US President George W. Bush (January 27, 2000 in New Hampshire)
This very week in 1989, there were protests in East Berlin and in Leipzig. By the end of that year, every communist dictatorship in Central America had collapsed.
- US President George W. Bush (November 6, 2003 in Washington, D.C.)
Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream.
- US President George W. Bush (October 2000)
I think we agree, the past is over.
- US President George W. Bush (May 10, 2000)
