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Medical Advice Requested

Gonad

DON'T FUCK WITH MY TITLE BITCH
aka LOL MY ANUS IS BLEEDING thread.

FOr the last month my stools have been bloody--I think. When I look behind me after pooping nine times out of ten there is blood in the toilet. At first I thought it was spotting but then I realized that the toilet paper I used to wipe my ass was bloody too.

Oh dear.

I don't think I've had anal sex in a long long time although I do tend to black out on the weekends, so it is possible. I should probably ask him, but anal sex has never led to a month of bloody poops before.


Do I really need to see a doctor? I tried looking on the internet but that really wasn't as informative as I had hoped.
 
aka LOL MY ANUS IS BLEEDING thread.

FOr the last month my stools have been bloody--I think. When I look behind me after pooping nine times out of ten there is blood in the toilet. At first I thought it was spotting but then I realized that the toilet paper I used to wipe my ass was bloody too.

Oh dear.

I don't think I've had anal sex in a long long time although I do tend to black out on the weekends, so it is possible. I should probably ask him, but anal sex has never led to a month of bloody poops before.


Do I really need to see a doctor? I tried looking on the internet but that really wasn't as informative as I had hoped.

Jesus.

It's rectal or colon cancer. You're dying. Pack your bags and take your last vacation.

Baring that, it's probably a bleeding hemorrhoid. See a doctor.

If it's from anal sex, the constant ramming of your head against your headboard is probably compacting your innards. The blood is natures way of telling you that eventually, your lungs are going to squirt out your ass.
 
Blood in the stool for females under 40 isnt usually cancer.

You should get a consult about a colonoscopy, though.
 
That's not medical advice unless you recommend that she collect the sample and then take it a doctor for lab analysis.

How about taking a dump in your mouth? Probably the only anal action you'll get at your age, until the nice ladies at the home start wiping your bottom for you.
 
How about taking a dump in your mouth?

Still not medical advice.

Probably the only anal action you'll get at your age,

Well, considering my wife and i aren't really into that to begin with, I really don't see any particularly great lose.

...until the nice ladies at the home start wiping your bottom for you.

Age is a fact of life and we're all dealt a hand full of invisible cards. It may well come to that at some point, or it may not. But I'm not going to dwell on it. ;)
 
Oh, I forgot the weirdest part--there is absolutely no pain. I wouldn't even have noticed except for all that red in the toilet bowl.
 
Oh, I forgot the weirdest part--there is absolutely no pain. I wouldn't even have noticed except for all that red in the toilet bowl.

I was wondering that. My next question for you would be um WTF are you eating?! Is your shit hard or soft? Maybe your ass needs a rest-but a month does seem like a long time-I would um probably go see a doctor about it to make sure nothing is wrong.
 
Actually, I was being light hearted, Sarek.

Perhaps I'll get a fucking kazoo out next time.
 
I stopped bleeding less than three days after posting this. TK = miracle cure for bleeding anus. Like a salve that only the likes of George Cohen would have sold. The Phantom President for prez.
 
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