I think that possibly you are one of the brightest posters on the board. Like many bright minds, though, you've reached a level where you've stagnated. You could choose to be something more positive, philanthropic, contributory, enlightening, creative, but the ego rewards are quicker and easier on the downard spiral of negativity and you meet with little resistance or reason not to follow this path. It could get real deep here but I think you already know this. Basically, I think you beg for someone to stop you - i.e., take a baseball bat to you - so you won't wind up some 50 year old man sleeping on someone's couch or sitting in a mobile home with beer and gravy stains on your t-shirt watching the evening news and wondering what the hell happened to your life because you were such a fabulous troll.