It’s finally fucking over.
THANK FUCKING GOD.
Ugh.
I just watched the final achievement pop after 122 hours of playtime. The main story takes under 20 hours. So what the fuck have I been doing for the extra 100? Grinding this fucking platinum trophy. Never again will I seek to platinum a Yakuza game. RGG Studio are psycho sadists, and I'm clearly a masochist for thinking pursuing the 100% completion trophy was a fun idea. .
With Yakuza 0 and Kiwami 1, my personal completion criteria was to finish the main story and do all the substories. Once you do this, the secret bosses (the Amon brothers) spawn, and you have to defeat them. These are really hard fights that the game almost winks at you to try to cheese because they are so unfair, and completing them in Yakuza 0 and Kiwami 1 was a really nice finish line for those games. I also do most of the mini-games. Alongside the mini-games, there are usually more involved sub-games in each game. I complete these too. In Kiwami 2, these are the Cabaret Club Grand Prix, Majima Construction, and Bouncer Missions.
That is typically good enough for me, but for some twisted reason, I decided in January that I would pursue the platinum. I play on legend difficulty as default which helped make this decision since that is also required for the plat, so I thought “why not” like the moron I am.
And yeah, it's almost broken me. The completion list for the platinum in this game is obscene.
Haruka's Requests
Ah, sweet innocent Haruka. You pledge to look after her in Kiwami 1 and this is how she repays you?

This is the face of the most sadistic character. Forget the battle hardened Yakuza bosses. Forget the Chinese hitmen and Korean mafia you have to face. The Amon Bros? lol. No.
Haruka gives you 45 requests if you want the plat. They're mostly minigame challenges and specific item purchases. No combat-related tasks or gear-specific fights. Just a lot of running around, playing darts, batting, karaoke, and buying her snacks. It's tedious, but necessary for 100% completion. Doesn't sound too bad, right?
WRONG.
While a lot of the requests are decoding her vague requests to go to certain diners (of which there are about a hundred) and order her certain dishes. These are time-consuming but whatever. The real pain comes from her karaoke and golf requests. Karaoke in Yakuza 0 and 1 was easy. it's just a simple rhythm game. It's still a simple rhythm game in Kiwami 2, but it's WAY harder.
You have to score 90 points on her song and then on your song. It is SUPER unforgiving, though. There are two modes, casual and passionate. On casual there are fewer notes to hit but it's actually the harder mode. Miss one note? LOL. Fuck you. Not good enough. Hit EVERY single note but get 2 “goods” instead of “greats”?
LOL. FUCK YOU. Not good enough.
Passionate is the way to go because you are afforded a FEW more slip ups, but now there are 3 times as many notes and it's faster. I felt my arm tense at one point, and a solid thought about launching my controller into my wall did pass my brain. I didn't in the end, but that's the closest I've come to hurling my controller since I got skill checked by the Nameless King in Dark Souls 3.
The other hair puller is the golf bingo. It's bullshit. Trust me. She also has you grinding away in the batting centre, and multiple gambling achievements that are separate from their own mini-game win conditions. It's painful and EXTREMELY time consuming. Again, this is a fun part of the game that ties into the story but it's fun if you do say...10 of the requests. Not 45.
Street Bosses
There are 18 Street Bosses—9 in Kamurocho and 9 in Sotenbori. They appear after defeating a certain number of enemy groups (Delinquents, Thugs, Yakuza). You get emails notifying you when a boss is ready to fight. They're not particularly hard, but tracking them down is a chore. Also, you need certain enemy types to spawn to trigger the next boss, and it's really fucking annoying when the game refuses to spawn the right enemy types.
Coliseum
The Coliseum is absolutely required for the completion list. You’ve got to clear a bunch of solo and team tournaments, each with different rules, and grind out enough victory points to progress further through the ranks. I really enjoy the Coliseum but like with everything in this game once you're going for the plat it becomes very grindy. Also, the final missions of these modes ramp up difficulty in ridiculous ways.
Can't rag on it too much though because it's a lot of fun:
Bouncer Missions
There are 78 Bouncer Missions. Seventy. Eight. Why?
It’s just recycled combat in small arenas with waves of enemies, over and over again. Some missions are short. Some are tedious. But it’s the last few — the final high-difficulty ones — where things go completely off the rails. These fights are Dark Souls 3 DLC boss level hard. Not even joking.
I almost tapped out. Multiple times. I seriously considered abandoning the whole platinum run because I genuinely didn’t know if I could clear the final ones. They expect perfect spacing, tight dodging, and absolutely zero room for error. You get juggled, stun-locked, and nuked by enemies that seem like they were balanced for someone playing on NG++++.
I finished them. Somehow. But I didn’t feel accomplished. I felt drained.
Cabaret Club Grand Prix
This is one of the main side modes in
Kiwami 2, and it’s actually really good. Back and better than ever from Yakuza 0 I spent way too much time mixing and maxing accessories and dresses on my hostesses. Playing glorified doll dress up at 41. Nice.
You manage a cabaret club, scout and train hostesses, then compete in league matches to climb through five ranks. You need to hire platinum hostesses, build their stats, max their affection, and win every match. There are also individual hostess side stories you have to complete. There is a lot of story in here as well. It's just a really cool part of the game.
Majima Construction
This is a real-time strategy minigame where you defend a construction site from waves of enemies. You hire NPC fighters (including real-life pro wrestlers), assign them to different positions, and watch the fight play out.
There are 21 missions in total, and you need to win all of them for completion. Early ones are fine, but later missions get ridiculous — enemies do massive damage, and if you didn’t level the right characters or place them perfectly, you’ll get steamrolled. What is more, the final mission has 17 waves, and it would take 15 minutes to play through, and I'd keep dying on wave 16. It… tests one patience. Let's leave it at that.
It’s another mode that’s fun in small doses but turns into a grind when you’re chasing 100%.
Traditional Japanese Games
Mahjong, Shogi, Koi-Koi, Oicho-Kabu. You can't skip them if you want the platinum.
I’ve been playing Mahjong for 30 years, so that was a big advantage. I didn’t need to learn the rules from scratch like most players do. Even then, the expert tables and tournament wins are unforgiving. You can't just know what you're doing — you also have to play well.
And then there’s the
STUPID achievement where you not only have to win two separate Expert Mahjong tournaments, but also go out with Ron or Tsumo
THIRTY FUCKING TIMES. Pure sadism from the devs.
Shogi usually filters people out fast, but again I’ve played chess for years and am way above average and Shogi’s very similar. Same ideas of tempo, piece value, spatial control. So that section wasn’t too bad for me, though winning without take-backs is still rough on expert.
Koi-Koi and Oicho-Kabu are pure RNG hell. You need to win thousands of tags for completion, and it’s just hours of praying the cards don’t screw you. Easily the most joyless part of the gambling section.
There’s also the random one-offs that show up in the completion list and waste your time. You have to win at Virtual-On with every character, beat the Toylets games on hard mode (literally a piss-based minigame), complete the Gravure photo shoot sessions perfectly (OK, this was pretty fun tbf), hit the UFO catcher prizes, and even take ten touristy photos across both cities.
Skill Trees & EXP Grind
You need to fully unlock every single ability on Kiryu’s skill grid. That means farming tens of thousands of experience points in every category — Soul, Technique, Body, and Charm. You don’t get enough from regular play, so you’ll be grinding minigames, eating meals, and doing repeat fights just to fill it all out. You will absolutely hit a wall late game where it’s nothing but XP farming for hours.
Final Thoughts
The game itself is fantastic if you ignore the platinum trophy. The main story is great, the drama, intrigue, twists, and turns are all top-notch as is to be expected from a main line Yakuza game. The thing is, I technically beat the main story just after Christmas, lol. I've been grinding since then. It should be noted my gaming time has been greatly reduced these past few months because of the move and upheaval but still. I love this franchise so much, but the 100% completion trophy stopped being fun at the end, and it was pure sunk cost that made me grit my teeth through the final ten hours of grindy bullshit. Play it, enjoy the story, do the substories, do the feature modes like Cabaret Club and Majima Construction, but don't pursue this platinum unless you enjoy pissing yourself off.
Amazing game. Platinum trophy? Not worth it.
I will take a break to finish Ghost of Tsushima and then probably Last of Us Part II before I dive back in for the next Yakuza adventure. I'm definitely going back to my previous completion criteria for that and all the ones after.

