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Moments where you killed.

Shitty Dual

Shitty Dual

schroedinger's fat
So I and about five others were watching the Episode of LOST where Charlie and Desmond are on that boat floating over the Looking Glass underwater station having some tête à tête about Desmond's precognitive visions of Charlie's death. When they finally agree that Desmond should swim down, Charlie knocks him unconscious as soon as he turns his back on him. At which point I summon my best Desmond-brogue and say "DINT SEE THAT ONE COMIN', BROTHAH."

Floored the whole fucking room. :bigass:
 
In the gazillion scenes where Frodo and Sam look at each other like angst ridden lovers, I
scream "KISS HIM! GRAB HIS TITS!!!"

Gets a laugh every time.
 
sometimes I play the ren and stimpy theme music over the intercom at work. other times it's the price is right theme. havent worked up the balls to play bananaphone over it yet.....but i will.....if it's the last thing i do.
 
IN THE TRAILER FOR EPISODE III WHEN THE FIRST PART OF CGI CAME ON THE SCREEN I YELLED AT THE TOP OF MY VOICE "LUCAS? MORE LIKE LUCASSHHHHHHHHH" AND THE ENTIRE CINEMA FELL ABOUT LAUGHING AND ALL THE GIRLS IN THE CINEMA HAD SEX WITH ME AND I MARRIED TWO OF THEM AND I WAS CROWNED KING OF THE CINEMA AND WORLD PEACE WAS DECLARED.
 
um. ok, that beats my story. :(
 
I killed Cosmic Average.
 
We know.
 
One time I was driving by some hobos, and one was crossing the street so I hit em. The other hobos laughed.

2 birds one stone.
 
The only time I make people laugh is when they are laughing at me instead of with me.
 
Damn, I thought I was going to be able to tell my story about nam, but its the wrong type of killing.

Wheres my parade?
 
Yub said:
The only time I make people laugh is when they are laughing at me instead of with me.
Click to expand...

Yeah thats why I try to laugh at myself before other people have a laugh at me.
 
Last night on The Amazing Race there was a task where the teams had to identify someone in a crowd of Army regulars doing martial-arts training in South Korea. Once correctly identified, that GI would go over to where a small wooden board was being held up and taekwondoe-kick it to smithereens, whereupon their next clue --hidden in the board-- would be revealed. One particularly grating, stupid contestant whose been annoying the living shit out of me the entire season chose her guy and ran him towards the board, at which point I cried out, "Kick her in the HEAD; see if a clue falls out!"

UP TOP
 
In our works christmas party this year the meal was followed by a take that tribute act.

They did a set, then asked if anyone had any requests.

I shouted "yeah, fuck off"

Got quite a few laughs.
 
Did they have a Robbie?
 
Yes, although they always had, they never got rid of theirs when the real ones split with him.

None of them looked like who they were meant to be, or sounded that much like them.

Me and the other men just drank at the bar while they were on, the girls seemed to like them though.
 
Wow, either the women in your town are really hard up, or your office is filled with fag hags. :eek:
 
I live for "kill" moments, it's why I exist. I try to do it every time I go to the piano bars, and more often than not I'll get one good line in that stops the room.

The best is when I killed on stage in a play/musical, especially if it was because of an original way I decided to say a line in the script that the director didn't dictate.

I kid you not, I stopped the show with the following lines, sometimes when my part wasn't even that big:

"I drove her!"

"Oh! We didn't know that!"

"Everybody mambo!"

(various Looney Tunes pratfalls in a Toulouse Latrec costume with shoes on my knees)

(glaring out at the audience after closing a closet door)

...and the all-time favorite:

"Rape."
 
Is picturing Eggs doing this:
[YOUTUBE]FW02c5UNGl0[/YOUTUBE]
 
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