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SHORT STORY

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
Nigel was a boy and he liked cars

"vroom vroom" he said one day to his mother an alcoholic

"fuck off you little brat" she said with a tongeu of acid

"wah wah!" he cried like the FOUR YEAR OLD he was

His mother hit him with a steel chair

"that oughta shut him up" seh said and ate some bacone

Nigel went into a coma and in that coma a dream came to him and took shape in his mind in images and sounds and it showed a white castel high on a hill and Nigel admired it from a far and the thought came to his mind to scale that hill and see the castle or himself so he set on the way but a monster stood in his path with big teeth so Nigel pulled out a gun and shot it and he wondered where from teh gun cameth but shrugged and headed for the castle and drew nearer and nearer but then the doctor pulled the plug on his life support mahicne and he never got to see it and his mother killed herself in shame the end
 
I THINK I REALLY NEED TO MEET NIGEL AND GIVE HIM A RED ROSE (LOL, THAT'S SLANG FOR 'BLOW JOB' LOL!)
 
I THINK I REALLY NEED TO MEET NIGEL AND GIVE HIM A ROUND ROGERING (LOL, THAT'S SLANG FOR ANAL SEX THAT I JUST MADE UP LOL!)
 
He's dead you sickos.
 
Oh, shit, you're right. I better buy a better brand of lube, then, eh what?
 
Or you could show some respect for the dead and just KISS HIM.
 
KISS KIM? HARRY KIM? EW!!!!
 
GAIL KIM YOU FRUTINOSEttt
 
OH, I'D EAT HER BREASTS.
 
I had talent once.
 
YOU NEVER DID.

EDIT: OR DID YOU?

EDIT EDIT: MAYBE YOU DID I FORGET

EDIT EDIT EDIT: I REALLY DON'T LIKE JAFFA CAKES

EDIT EDIT EDIT EDIT: DO THE GOA'ULD HAVE JAFFA CAKES?
 
This was no necessarily a demonstration of said talent.
 
WHOOO!
 
The Italians got an extended version of the titles too the lucky GREASERS.
 
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