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Since my old "Ask me anything" thread is archived
- Thread starter Sadistic Bastard
- Start date
Sadistic Bastard
No Mercy
Security, money (I can always make more), resources, any physical possession I owned. I would be willing to try to get rid of my defense mechanisms if asked, but can't say if it would work (some of those are very ingrained into me).
I shall expand on your question, however.
I would NOT sacrifice personal honor for it, and I won't break a vow for it. I won't sacrifice my own sense of identity for it.
Anyone who was worthy of my love wouldn't want me to anyway.
-SB
I shall expand on your question, however.
I would NOT sacrifice personal honor for it, and I won't break a vow for it. I won't sacrifice my own sense of identity for it.
Anyone who was worthy of my love wouldn't want me to anyway.
-SB
emme
Tool of the muses
Sadistic Bastard
No Mercy
Yes, I have fallen in love with my partners. I don't stop myself from that.
However, "Polyamorous" is a description of how this works. As I said before, the word and concept is often mis-used and misunderstood. The key is "simple", but difficult to execute.
Love each person as an individual. Not as a substitute, not as an image, not as a fantasy or illusion. See then, hear them, and love what which you see and hear, uniquely and unstintingly. There's actually enough love in the human heart...
However, poly only works if ALL of those loved also love in return. "Poly" in stories and fiction is often actually an "apex" relationship, or a stable/harem. The idea is not to have ONE person loved by a competing pool of people, but for all of the "pool" to love each other as well. It need not be sexual between all of the partners, but everyone needs to work WITH each other at some level.
The closest I've actually found where this works is the old style Mormon plural marriages, where the women acted almost like a commune, sharing chores and child-raising duties as well as a husband. They all had the spiritual bond through their religion that they were an "eternal" family, and so they were ALL accepted.
Now in practical terms, think of a "conventional" couple. You have ONE relationship. Now make it a triad. You have THREE relationships now. A "quad" and you have TWELVE to deal with (each of the 4 members with 3 relationships). That's a LOT of work. Even one relationship is hard at times. While love is unlimited, time and energy are. So Poly works for very few people.
Sexual and emotional closeness should work with each other. As I said, sex without emotional/spiritual intimacy is just friction. So your statement is one I agree with...don't change.
The end result is I've become VERY picky about whom I take to bed. "Play" is more casual...but I have to at least like them and be intrigued.
I have a bit of a reputation as a snob in some circles...and I'm rather pleased by that.
-SB
However, "Polyamorous" is a description of how this works. As I said before, the word and concept is often mis-used and misunderstood. The key is "simple", but difficult to execute.
Love each person as an individual. Not as a substitute, not as an image, not as a fantasy or illusion. See then, hear them, and love what which you see and hear, uniquely and unstintingly. There's actually enough love in the human heart...
However, poly only works if ALL of those loved also love in return. "Poly" in stories and fiction is often actually an "apex" relationship, or a stable/harem. The idea is not to have ONE person loved by a competing pool of people, but for all of the "pool" to love each other as well. It need not be sexual between all of the partners, but everyone needs to work WITH each other at some level.
The closest I've actually found where this works is the old style Mormon plural marriages, where the women acted almost like a commune, sharing chores and child-raising duties as well as a husband. They all had the spiritual bond through their religion that they were an "eternal" family, and so they were ALL accepted.
Now in practical terms, think of a "conventional" couple. You have ONE relationship. Now make it a triad. You have THREE relationships now. A "quad" and you have TWELVE to deal with (each of the 4 members with 3 relationships). That's a LOT of work. Even one relationship is hard at times. While love is unlimited, time and energy are. So Poly works for very few people.
Sexual and emotional closeness should work with each other. As I said, sex without emotional/spiritual intimacy is just friction. So your statement is one I agree with...don't change.
The end result is I've become VERY picky about whom I take to bed. "Play" is more casual...but I have to at least like them and be intrigued.
I have a bit of a reputation as a snob in some circles...and I'm rather pleased by that.
-SB
Friday
Bazinga!
You have to be a special type of person to be polyamorous, in the fullest sense of the word.
I need to be #1 where my partner is concerned. Sharing our intimacy would be a sign of betrayal, in my book. I don't mind my partner having friends of the opposite sex, but I draw the line at the level of closeness that should be reserved solely for me.
You are fortunate to have found someone who shares your views on love and sex.
I need to be #1 where my partner is concerned. Sharing our intimacy would be a sign of betrayal, in my book. I don't mind my partner having friends of the opposite sex, but I draw the line at the level of closeness that should be reserved solely for me.
You are fortunate to have found someone who shares your views on love and sex.
Friday
Bazinga!
I agree with you that it's a healthy thing for your son to see the affection and love you have for each other. That's kinda nice.
However, there is an issue of him viewing his mom as having no self esteem, taken out of the context of your sex life. Aren't you concerned that seeing his mom treat you as her "master", and you treating her as your "slave", will give him the wrong impression of how to treat women? What if he internalizes the dominance, without the assent and compassion?
Are you religious enough that the "head of household" excuse will seem realistic?
Starship Coyote
Original Gangster!
SB, What wine goes best with Ritz crackers and Cheez-Wiz?
Sadistic Bastard
No Mercy
LOL!
His mom having no self esteem?
My Dear Miss Friday, again you have NO idea of the mental makeup of a woman who chooses this lifestyle, and no idea of what I appreciate and enhance in such a woman.
I do dishes, I do laundry, I do better than 80% of the cooking. As far as "slips" they won't be so obvious as calling pix "slave". I AM likely to call her pixie in front of him. A woman whom I collar has been pushed and passed through experiences that most cannot handle. As a result, her status is a source of pride, not shame. If anything, her self esteem is higher now than when I met her. I am not at all worried that my son will see anything harmful.
As for the head of household, yes, I am religious enough to make it stick. A great deal of the problems in today's society is that the sense of "role" has been lost. Gender grants us different strengths and abilities, and while one can carry the roles of the other at need, I believe MOST people are happier in a proper role. The problem rises when the opposite role isn't honored, or valued. Then people want to cross roles...and you get unhappy people wondering what's wrong.
There is a role for a man in a family. There is a role for a woman in a family. BOTH are vital and important. However, a man's role is to lead the family, and be worthy of that leadership role because when he makes a mistake he fixes it and takes responsibility for it. This dove-tails, in an exaggerated form, to my D/s roles and responsibilities.
It is this acceptance of responsibility AND his daily example of how I treat pix (and realistically, I treat her extremely well) are going to make him into a Dom male, most likely. However, I don't just command and then sit on my rear end all day...he's going to see that I work, that pix and I talk, and that she does things to please me as I do things to please and support her. We are surprisingly "conventional" to the untrained eye.
So no, I don't believe he will become abusively dominant. He'll see, and be taught, the responsibility that goes with the privilege.
-SB
Sadistic Bastard
No Mercy
Interesting spelling.
But of course, there can be only ONE answer.
Mogan David, of course.
I recommend Vintage Late November day-shift.
-SB
missmanners
grrrrrrrr...
Did you set a goal for 2009?
mm
mm
Sadistic Bastard
No Mercy
Several. I used to post them in my journal...since that's gone, I'll just have to tattoo them on...
Speaking of which, one is "Finish Left shoulder detail".
-SB
Speaking of which, one is "Finish Left shoulder detail".
-SB
Sadistic Bastard
No Mercy
I usually view food as a part of the seduction process (which IS sex, btw). As for actively using food during what most people think of as sex, I've tried it (whip cream, various sauces, bananna, etc), but usually I simply find it to be a somewhat messy distraction.
I LIKE the taste of woman, in all of the variations she offers, I don't see much need in a different flavor.
I do take care when selecting massage oils or lubricants to get something pleasant tasting as I do tend to put my mouth on more or less every part of the woman I'm with sooner or later.
If I must pick a favorite "sex food": for prelude Oyster's Rockefeller and an Amaretto Souffle'. The oysters may or may not work as an aphrodisiac, but the dish itself is rich and warming, and can be eaten with the hands and fed to one another with the fingertips. As for the souffle, if one has ever had a REAL one, properly cooked and fluffy, then the amaretto and the ritual of sharing something so difficult to make is a good way to promise other difficult yet mutual experiences later.
For during the act, the mildly cold shock and creamy taste/texture of good old-fasioioned whip cream from a can works well.
I do like to drink during some types of scenes. Usually if it's an "edge" or heavy scene, I'll sip whiskey over the course of it to focus me (not to getting drunk, just enough to take the edge off). It's like dancing, I dance better when I've had some alcohol (even if I must lead).
-SB
I LIKE the taste of woman, in all of the variations she offers, I don't see much need in a different flavor.
I do take care when selecting massage oils or lubricants to get something pleasant tasting as I do tend to put my mouth on more or less every part of the woman I'm with sooner or later.
If I must pick a favorite "sex food": for prelude Oyster's Rockefeller and an Amaretto Souffle'. The oysters may or may not work as an aphrodisiac, but the dish itself is rich and warming, and can be eaten with the hands and fed to one another with the fingertips. As for the souffle, if one has ever had a REAL one, properly cooked and fluffy, then the amaretto and the ritual of sharing something so difficult to make is a good way to promise other difficult yet mutual experiences later.
For during the act, the mildly cold shock and creamy taste/texture of good old-fasioioned whip cream from a can works well.
I do like to drink during some types of scenes. Usually if it's an "edge" or heavy scene, I'll sip whiskey over the course of it to focus me (not to getting drunk, just enough to take the edge off). It's like dancing, I dance better when I've had some alcohol (even if I must lead).
-SB
Love Child
One Love
Is there an S&M method for addiction? I have been thinking about that this week, and while some parts of it seem pleasurable, some seem wrong-the whole pain and pleasure, some things should be kept seperate in my mind, but still, if I were addicted to something and wanted to use pain to overcome that addiction, could I?
Sadistic Bastard
No Mercy
S&M can be an escape, like drugs or fantasy games or even vanilla sex. The problem is that people use these things to escape problems that are harder to deal with in 'real life'. It's something to absorb energy and distract rather than dealing with problems. Pleasure/pain is an endorphin rush. That rush can be addicting.
By using simple association, you can link the two. For example, if you are spanked and then given an orgasm either during or immediately after the spanking, eventually your body will associate the two sensations. Someone so conditioned will become aroused when they are spanked. In some cases, they can be brought to orgasm through the spanking alone (although some technique is involved, there is a way of hitting the ass that can move energy through the body to the clit, but even with that technique the energy/sensation there is subtle and not enough to cause orgasm in most non-conditioned women).
D/S (not necessarily S&M, the two are vastly different once you examine them) can be used to overcome addiction. The Dom/Domme can impose structure to help an addict resist their urges. Of course, then it's a struggle between the addiction and the desire of the submissive to please/obey their Dom. The sub must want to change...if they don't no amount of D/s is going to change the addictive behavior.
Does that begin to answer the question?
-SB
By using simple association, you can link the two. For example, if you are spanked and then given an orgasm either during or immediately after the spanking, eventually your body will associate the two sensations. Someone so conditioned will become aroused when they are spanked. In some cases, they can be brought to orgasm through the spanking alone (although some technique is involved, there is a way of hitting the ass that can move energy through the body to the clit, but even with that technique the energy/sensation there is subtle and not enough to cause orgasm in most non-conditioned women).
D/S (not necessarily S&M, the two are vastly different once you examine them) can be used to overcome addiction. The Dom/Domme can impose structure to help an addict resist their urges. Of course, then it's a struggle between the addiction and the desire of the submissive to please/obey their Dom. The sub must want to change...if they don't no amount of D/s is going to change the addictive behavior.
Does that begin to answer the question?
-SB
Sadistic Bastard
No Mercy
A person's attachments are, by definition, attached to themselves.
Since posting yourself is illegal according to the Postmaster General (and I'm sure the airlines have something to do with it too), I would assume that attempting to post your "attachments" would be similarly illegal.
Perhaps a specialist courier service or a charter would help you?
Regards,
SB
Since posting yourself is illegal according to the Postmaster General (and I'm sure the airlines have something to do with it too), I would assume that attempting to post your "attachments" would be similarly illegal.
Perhaps a specialist courier service or a charter would help you?
Regards,
SB
Tamar_Garish
beer, I want beer
:lol:
From what I have seen, as risk of bringing SBs wrath upon me, it is not women with no self-esteem who are into being a submissive.
It is extremely strong women who are or have had to be strong, in control, in an area of leadership who are intrigued by letting go completely and handing the reigns to someone else.
Think about it...do you have the internal fortitude and will it takes to put complete and utter trust in another person's hands? To put your life, safety and deepest fantasies at the whims of another? I would wager most people would say no.
A woman with no self-esteem is not going to seek or find pleasure at being made to feel weaker or in being humiliated. A strong woman won't feel weak while giving her all and indulging her fantasies. And the dirtiest secret of all is that most Doms are as enslaved as their slaves are...they are there for a reason themselves and more often than not, if you could read their minds you would find that internally, it is the Dom who is the weaker element in that dance, not the sub. :lol:
Huh...I guess I better think of a question before I get spanked for posting in here without one...mmm.
SB...how would you define romance and how do you create it for your loved ones?