So tesco beefburgers are really horse meat

[whisky]

No wonder they give me the trots.

 

[headvoid]

The french are shrugging as we speak.

 

[whisky]

Don't they do that all the time anyway?

Whilst riding a push bike, wearing a beret, and having a necklace of onions?

 

[Cassie]

I've never eaten horse meat, it is illegal in Florida anyway.

 

[whisky]

What?

You can make boots out of snakes but you cant make burgers out of horses?

 

[Cassie]

There's a black market horse meat problem now (srsly). I have no idea why it's illegal here, or how it came to be illegal.

 

[Cassie]

Ah HA! Okay, apparently it was made illegal because people's horses were being stolen and butchered. I can believe that, because someone in my family was constantly having his horses and goats stolen. He even found one of his miniature horses with its throat slashed, but I guess the people trying to steal it left in a hurry or something so didn't get to take it with them.

OF course that doesn't really explain why eating horse meat is illegal, when they could import the meat from a real butcher.

 

[whisky]

Probably people in the beef industry didn't want the competition.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Also it turns out Tesco's horseburgers are really polar bear.

 

[Cassie]

I want a unicorn burger.

 

[headvoid]

[ whisky ]Tesco have assured us the situation is now stable [\ whisky ]

 

[whisky]

Hay!

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

I've always wanted to try their philly cheesesteak.

 

[whisky]

I wonder if Pepperoni will rethink their current "Its a bit of an animal" advertising campaign?

 

[whisky]

This warning is a bit late anyway, its like shutting the stable door after you have bolted the horse.

 

[headvoid]

I believe there is even some problems with the vegetarian burgers. Stuffed full of UniQuorn.

 

[whisky]

Or if you want a cheaper brand, there is always my Lidl pony.

 

[headvoid]

Stop horsing around and pulling my reins. I am the champion crap joker here. You are old news now, out to pasture.

 

[whisky]

Sounds like someone's got the bit between their teeth.

Watch out, or I might send you to the horsebital.

These burgers are fine as part of a stable diet.

 

[Sarek]

Oy. Another topic I shouldn't of read.

Screw it. I'm taking my can of Unicorn meat and finding a quiet place to eat it. Alone!