Specific neighbours discussion

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

I have one neighbor who keeps asking me to accept UPS packages for her. Then she doesn't pick them up for days. THE NERVE!

 

[headvoid]

Tell her you are worried the packages may get mixed up with your deliveries of Celebrity Sperm.

 

[CaptainWacky]

It's probably drugs.

 

[Cassie]

Punch her in the TITS.

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

WHAT ABOUT YOUR NEIGHBOURS? LET'S SWAP STORIES FOR THE NEXT 26 YEARS

 

[headvoid]

I have a gagging order.

 

[CaptainWacky]

I have nothing interesting to say.

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

That reply was so quick, one might call it a gag reflex.

 

[Cassie]

My backyard neighbors gave me a bucket of blueberries and two squash plants they didn't want. MY GAY NEIGHBORS are trying to get their little dachshund PICKLES to breed, AND ALSO my cat impregnated their cat.

 

[headvoid]

Gay neighbours? I thought there was a state funded extermination programme in the southern states.

 

[Fuddlemiff]

My neighbour's been singing Jingle Bells for the last couple of hours. IT'S NOT FUCKING CHRISTMAS

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

Florida took that law off the books, probably after The Golden Girls became so popular.

 

[Cassie]

The gays are everywhere MAKING THE WORLD FABULOUS.

(don't believe everything you hear about the SOUTH)

 

[Dr Dave]

My neighbour's been singing Jingle Bells for the last couple of hours. IT'S NOT FUCKING CHRISTMAS

Are they an upstairs neighbour or downstairs?

 

[headvoid]

I want a gay neighbour. Mine drives a JCB and plays the accordion, these are not generally gay pursuits.

 

[Fuddlemiff]

Great, now we're going to have an infographic from the Sausageman about gay JCB driving and accordion playing statistics. I hope you're proud of yourself!

Incidentally, my jingle bells neighbours are a gay couple, although only one of them actually lives there. The other one has a key and lets himself in most days. And they're almost always arguing.

 

[Dr Dave]

My question was not answered.

HOW CAN I ADVISE YOU WITHOUT INFORMATION FUDDLENOANSWERMIFF?

 

[Fuddlemiff]

THEY'RE ON TOP OKAY, THEY'RE BOTH ON TOP

 

[Dr Dave]

KINKY!

 

[CaptainWacky]

There's gay live across the road from me but they've never done anything interesting.

It's almost as if they're just...normal people.