Troll Kingdom

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STARBUCKS PRANCES PRECARIOUSLY WITH STIFF SWIGS TO THE RUIN OF THE TOILET SEAT!

The nearest Starbucks is...I don't even know where the nearest Starbucks is. :(
There isn't a Second Cup franchise around here either.
Just Ten million Tim Horton's and I HATE their coffee!
There, I said it.
 
I rip off Starbucks by buying a spicy tea, drinking half of it, then filling up the other half with their whole milk for a chai latte. Especially since they serve their tea hot as the sun.
 
I rip off Starbuck's by never spending a cent in any of their stores, thereby doing my part to bankrupt them. IT'S WORKING I CAN FEEL IT.
 
If you get herpes from a toilet seat the Shat sat upon, do you have sherpes?
 
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