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State of CHING

headvoid

Can I have Ops?
As you all know "Price Tag" by Jesse J has now become a global issue. During the last few months, it has been played so many times, it became a sentient being and started to make some astute decisions.

As the song started to accumulate wealth and land, it also started to build attack other songs. The small, although unfortunately fascist, state of "Firework" by Katy Perry was overrun by a large army of Crack troops orginating from the "Kerching Kerching" region of Europe. This particularly overplayed line became so powerful that Austria and most of Poland have had to cede vast tracts of land. The line "Not about the Bling" grew with such rapidity and ferocity that it took over large areas of Southern Africa, making it (Ironically) a large producer of diamonds and gold. The sentient beast at the head of the "Not about the bling" line state sees no irony, and in fact has crushed any dissent by playing "baby" by Justin Beiber continually over loud speakers now attached to every citizens head.

Fearne Cotton stated yesterday:
vapid idiotic woman said:
Everyone here at Radio JESSE (formerly Radio 1) had no idea at the time it was growing into a sentient being. One morning we all woke up and boom, the song had bought Tesco and most of France. We tried to send Stuart Marconi out with some Belle and Sebastian, but it was no use, by that point Price Tag had secured tactical nuclear weapons.
 
"WE'RE REAL LAWYERS!!", says that bloke off The Bill from inside London's City Hall, which is for some reason standing in for the LAWYERS4U offices.

I'm sure their real offices look even better than Foster and Partner's award winning design, but were being used as a refuge center for orphaned kittens during the advert's filming.
 
I also hate those adverts where a man with a regional accent is doing a spoken word version of a song or poem. You know the ones.
 
They need more adverts where a fit naked lady almost shows you the goods, but somehow manages to keep all the best bits hidden.

Dosnt matter what they are advertising.
 
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