STORY FOR THE DAY (FRIDAY)

[CaptainWacky]

Stuart walked into a bar.

"Hello, can I help you?" said the robot bartender (it was the future.)

"No," Stuart said, honestly. "Nobody can help me."

"Drink then?" it asked, no emotion in its mechinical voice.

"No, I don't drink," said Stuart, evenly. "I don't do anything."

"Well, you walked into my bar, that's something!" said the robot, engaging 'Happy Mode'.

"Yeah, I'm a real winner," said Stuart, reaching into his pocket. He pulled out a THERMAL DETONATOR.

"Oh my, a thermal detonator!" said the robot. "If I was wearing pants I would have soiled them! Are you going to rob me?"

"Nah," said Stuart and blew up the bar killing himself, the robot, 39 other people and three cats who were in an alley outside.

THE END

 

[Ishcabittle]

I sometimes want to do that while I'm at the office. Or on the bus. Or at a customer's home. Or at a major sporting event. Or on top of Ol' Smokey.

 

[curiousa2z]

me, not so much.

 

[Kerb Crawler]

I can't wait to see how Wacky tackles the sequel since all the principal characters are seemingly deaded.

I'm betting it has something to do with time travel and a croquet match played with 30 lb. hammers.

 

[Big Dick McGee]

That brought a tear to my eye.

Not so much because it was sad, but because reading it distracted me while I was putting in my contact lenses, and I poked myself in the eye.

 

[CaptainWacky]

The robot coud be rebuilt and look for revenge...

 

[Ishcabittle]

Revenge on the dude that blew himself into tiny, tiny, itty bitty, teeny weeny pieces?

 

[CaptainWacky]

But how can you get revenge...on a dead man?

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

I wish Stuart had asked the robot if he were fully functional, programmed in mulitple (gay) techniques before blowing him up.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Was it a pleasure-bot?

 

[Ishcabittle]

I look forward to Fridays now.

Unrelated reasons.

 

[jack]

I CANT SLEEP I NEED MORE STORIES

 

[CaptainWacky]

NATNATE KEIRA NATALIE NATALIE NKEIRA KEIRA NATALIE NATALIE KEIRA KEIRA NATALIELAEIL KEIRA KNATAEI KEIRA NAT

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

HAVA NAGUILAH HAVA NATALIE OUR LADY OF THE JEWDI

 

[CaptainWacky]

Is it possible to learn NATALIE'S SOU?

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

Yes. But you may have to dissect her first.

 

[CaptainWacky]

HAVE YOU EVEr, EVER FELT LIKE THIS, STRANGE THINGS HAPPEND YOU'RE GOING ROUND THE TWIST

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

IS IT NEXT FRIDAY YET>?????

 

[Stuart]

Are you talking about me?

 

[CaptainWacky]

No.