The Cast of Eastenders should all be replaced...

[Gagh]

...with Sumo Wrestlers. Just for one episode, without being advertised or mentioned. All the Wrestlers should deliver the lines for both male & female parts in broken English.

The episode should then never be mentioned on the BBC website, no public apology should be made.

 

[The Tomtrek]

I'd like to see an episode where every single character meets in Albert Square and has a mass suicide. As the corpses of the entire cast hit the ground at the same time, the pool of blood slowly spills down the street.


DUN DUN DUN

DUN
DUNDUNDUNDUN

 

[CaptainWacky]

Michelle Ryan returns, shoots Doc Cotton in the face, then just walks away and nobody mentions it.

 

[Gagh]

Until Bouncer from Neighbours pisses in the bullet wound.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Have you see that advert with Bianca and her scummy children singing a Jackson Five song? DEATH.

 

[Fuddlemiff]

I think that ad's hilarious. I'm guessing they used the old auto tuner on her voice though.

There should DEFINITELY be a musical episode of Eastenders. There's serious potential there.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Dirty Den singing "Rest In Peace"!?

 

[Fuddlemiff]

Pat: "Give me sumfin te shaaaaht abbaaaahht!"

Stall holders: "Oooooohh oooooh oooooooooh!"

Pat "I need sumfink te shaaaahht abbbaaaatt!"

Stall holders: "Innn-iiiiii-iiiiitttt!"

 

[Gagh]

They got the FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKIN' MUSTARD AHHHHHHHHHHHHT!

 

[CaptainWacky]

Are there any dirty lesbians in EE at the moment? Do they feel cum-plete?

 

[whisky]

In program lesbians 0

Lesbian actresses playing straight 2

 

[CaptainWacky]

Oh yeah, Fat Pat is gay and counts as two people.

 

[Gagh]

In program lesbians 0

Lesbian actresses playing straight 2

Fat Pat - who's the other?

 

[whisky]

SHirley

 

[Gagh]

Really? That does surprise me.

 

[whisky]

It does? With that face?

 

[Gagh]

No. I was, as par for the course, being utterly sarcastic ;

 

[whisky]

D'oh!

 

[Fuddlemiff]

Is Shirly the one that looks like a younger, much angrier Pat?

 

[whisky]

Possibly, she was also teh governer in bad girls.

Shes making a play for Phil at the moment.