THE DATABASE OF LIES

[Tisiphone]

The Jesus stick can't really channel Jesus.

 

[Ishcabittle]

A dowel rod is actually a conduit to Nirvana.

 

[headvoid]

Condaleeza Rice has a large collection of illegaly imported Marmosets, She asks them for advice on key strategic issues. Cheney was ousted because "Mr Chops" didn't like him

 

[Cranky Bastard]

Marmosets are native in Montana.

 

[whisky]

Acting like a complete pervert is a sure fire way to be a hit with the ladies

 

[CaptainWacky]

The Simpsons is filmed before a live studio audience.

 

[Cassie]

Lost is filled with government secrets that are being decoded by chimpanzees as we speak.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Pikachu is not an official Pokemon.

 

[Cranky Bastard]

Neither is my dick.

 

[Loktar]

Cylons are real and were sent by Skynet to terminate Wacky.

 

[headvoid]

Jerry Bruckenheimer has an unnatural fear of loud noises

 

[headvoid]

All of the lies about Tom Cruise we told were actually true.

 

[Cassie]

Tom Cruise's is living on Katie's breast milk and their kid is starving.

 

[Loktar]

Tom Cruise's kid will soon be adopted by Madonna.

 

[Cranky Bastard]

Tom Cruise's kid will soon be adopted by Madonna.

Nah, the kid isn't black enough.