THE NEW YEAR GHOST

[CaptainWacky]

SCROOGE WOKE TO SEE A GHOST BEFORE HIM

SCROOGE: WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?

GHOST: THE NEW YEAR GHOST

SCROOGE: I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS! I'M 98 YEARS OLD!

GHOST: BOO!

SCROOGE: AH!

(SCROOGE DIES AND TURNS INTO A GHOST.)

SCROOGE: SO WHAT'S THE POINT OF LIFE IF YOU JUST TURN INTO AN IMMORTAL GHOST AT THE ENED?

GHOST: YOU'RE NOT REALLY A GHOST, THIS IS JUST YOUR BRAIN SPLUTTERING AND DYING AND CREATING ONE LAST FANTASY TO KEEP YOU CALM AND SANE AS YOUR ENTIRE EXISTENCE ENDS.

SCROOGE: OH. THAT SUCKS.

GHOST: YEP!

SCROOGE: I REGRET NOTHING!

GHOST: NOT EVEN ALL THOSE CHILDREN YOU HAD KILLED?

SCROOGE: NOTHING!

GHOST: FINE BY ME, I HAVE NO MORALS!

(THEY KISS THE END)

 

[Tisiphone]

God Blesses Hitler!

 

[CaptainWacky]

THE NEW YEAR GHOST WILL RETURN NEXT YEAR SO WATCH OUT FOR THAT

 

[Tisiphone]

But will he be the Ghost of New Year's past???

 

[FBI parte due]

I spent last New Year's Eve getting lost and wandering around the fens looking for stupid college students to jump for pot. Then I watched King Kong.

But tonight I just get to sleep off the effects of spending 15 hours cooped up in the back of a minivan.

 

[CaptainWacky]

You'd have to be high to watch King Kong!

(Or dead.)

 

[Tisiphone]

I went out last New Year's as well...and opted to stay in tonight since I have to work tomorrow.

OH THE HUMANITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[CaptainWacky]

I opted to pretend that I'm immortal.

 

[Cassie]

OMG FBI was kidnapped?!!

 

[CaptainWacky]

that's what the new year ghost says

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

LETS PLAY YOU GO FIRST

 

[CaptainWacky]

Got to do SOMETHING all year until it's time for the ghost again, I'll play.

 

[Dr Dave]

So the ghost of New years is Hitler?