CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
Why do they call it boxing day lol I could just look it up on wiki pedia something about the queen giving out presents in boxes to commoners and then then the commoners' children play in the boxes because of course children always prefer to play with boxes due to their boudless imaginations and shit lol I miss being a child so much and guess what I'LL NEVER BE ONE AGAIN how fucked up is that, do you ever think about it, the linearity (WORD?) of life well you probably do on a superficial level but REALLY think about it and you cry LOL WHAT IS THIS IT'S A JOKE CAN'T COMPREHEND MOST OF THE UNIVERSE IS EMPTY SPACE WHY DOES MY CONSCIOUSNESS EXIST IN THE MIDDLE OF IT IS IT SO THAT I CAN ASK THIS QUESTION WELL OKAY I'VE ASKED IT...NOW WHAT?
Anyway.
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Johnny Nose decided he would go to the park and meet girls.
"I'll go to the park and meet girls!" he said out loud. He felt that commentating on his life would somehow make it more meaningful. "Yes, a great idea! THIS TIME I will meet girls and and the girls will...will meet me! Haha! MOOOOO!" He said that last bit at a cow who was staring at him with its cold cow eyes. Johnny would have liked to believe that the cow could tell that he was not like the other people, that he was special, that he had some high destiny...but, honestly, he didn't get that impression from the cow.
He headed towards the park. It meant going down the street, which meant walking by people. He didn't like being seen by people anymore. He used to. He used to perform for them, let them know that they were witnessing Johnny Nose live and in person. But...he didn't enjoy that as much anymore. They didn't seem to see Johnny Nose. They seemed to see a crazy person. They'd point at him, always point. He could feel their fingers poking his ribs when they point. They'd laugh, often they'd laugh. Sometimes they'd threaten him. He never understood that. Why threaten someone just for being a little eccentric? It hurt him to think about it. He used to be able to tell himself that they were threatening him because they were threatened by him and his greatness...but being honest with himself, that definitely wasn't the case.
"Still, I'm going to the park to meet girls!" he said. He decided to go quickly throught he street. Everything would be fine in the park. Less people...and he'd be there, he had plans, he was going to meet girls, it would be okay.
"I'll be okay."
He walked down the street as fast as he could. It was going well...until he was almost ran over crossing the road. But he kept going, didn't even look at the car that was honking at him. "It doesn't understand, stupid car," he said. A passing old woman looked at him oddly, maybe she'd heard him saying "stupid car." Ignore her. "Ignore her."
He was at the park. That wasn't so bad. He was shaking but it wasn't so bad.
"Now to find me some girls!" He strolled around confidently. Well, he tried to. He was strolling in what he thought was a confident way, but he didn't feel confident. He felt sick. He felt overwhelmed. He wanted to go...home.
"But you don't have a home, you're homeless, you fool! Oh, there's a shelter, PATHETIC HOMELESS SHELTER FOR LOSERS." Oh dear, someone heard that, a man with a moustache, where did he come from, never mind, ignore him, keeping walking.
"Girls, girls, girls, want to meet girls, meet meet meet, want to show them my meat, and by meat I mean my penis...penis penis penis." No one could hear, he was saying it softly. "Penis penis penis...PENIS PENIS PENIS!" He had started shouting before he even knew what he was doing. Had he developed tourette's? "PENIS!"
"Is there something wrong, mate?" A different voice, not his! Weird to hear someone else talk. It was moustache man...and a girl! A girl was with him, hot, sexy...well, no, she was average, painfully average, not fit for Johnny Nose.
"Paintfully average, not fit for Johnny Nose...hehe, not fit. You're not fit!" He tried to skip away, but moustache man was holding him.
"Is there someone who looks after you?"
"YEAH, MY PAL JESUS, HE DIED ON THE SINS FOR MY CROSS, OKAY JIMMINY!" Moustache man was so confused by this that he released his grip and Johnny skipped away...well, it was more like a run.
"Home, home, home for more meat, ARR, penis...fit, fit...girls...you all betrayed me...only the cow is on my side...I'm not mad, I just talk that way...all a character, all part of being Johnny Nose...but I AM Johnny Nose AND I'M BETTER THAN YOU! HEHEHEHE, FISH, FISH, FIIIIISH! YEAH, YOU POINT, IT'S NOT HURTING MY RIBS, NOTHING HURTS, NOTHING, I'M JOHNNY NOSE AND I RUN THIS TOWN I RUN THIS REALITY I THINK MORE THAN YOU EVER THINK YOU COULD THINK...THINK ON THAT!"
This time, the car did hit him.
Anyway.
____________________________-----
Johnny Nose decided he would go to the park and meet girls.
"I'll go to the park and meet girls!" he said out loud. He felt that commentating on his life would somehow make it more meaningful. "Yes, a great idea! THIS TIME I will meet girls and and the girls will...will meet me! Haha! MOOOOO!" He said that last bit at a cow who was staring at him with its cold cow eyes. Johnny would have liked to believe that the cow could tell that he was not like the other people, that he was special, that he had some high destiny...but, honestly, he didn't get that impression from the cow.
He headed towards the park. It meant going down the street, which meant walking by people. He didn't like being seen by people anymore. He used to. He used to perform for them, let them know that they were witnessing Johnny Nose live and in person. But...he didn't enjoy that as much anymore. They didn't seem to see Johnny Nose. They seemed to see a crazy person. They'd point at him, always point. He could feel their fingers poking his ribs when they point. They'd laugh, often they'd laugh. Sometimes they'd threaten him. He never understood that. Why threaten someone just for being a little eccentric? It hurt him to think about it. He used to be able to tell himself that they were threatening him because they were threatened by him and his greatness...but being honest with himself, that definitely wasn't the case.
"Still, I'm going to the park to meet girls!" he said. He decided to go quickly throught he street. Everything would be fine in the park. Less people...and he'd be there, he had plans, he was going to meet girls, it would be okay.
"I'll be okay."
He walked down the street as fast as he could. It was going well...until he was almost ran over crossing the road. But he kept going, didn't even look at the car that was honking at him. "It doesn't understand, stupid car," he said. A passing old woman looked at him oddly, maybe she'd heard him saying "stupid car." Ignore her. "Ignore her."
He was at the park. That wasn't so bad. He was shaking but it wasn't so bad.
"Now to find me some girls!" He strolled around confidently. Well, he tried to. He was strolling in what he thought was a confident way, but he didn't feel confident. He felt sick. He felt overwhelmed. He wanted to go...home.
"But you don't have a home, you're homeless, you fool! Oh, there's a shelter, PATHETIC HOMELESS SHELTER FOR LOSERS." Oh dear, someone heard that, a man with a moustache, where did he come from, never mind, ignore him, keeping walking.
"Girls, girls, girls, want to meet girls, meet meet meet, want to show them my meat, and by meat I mean my penis...penis penis penis." No one could hear, he was saying it softly. "Penis penis penis...PENIS PENIS PENIS!" He had started shouting before he even knew what he was doing. Had he developed tourette's? "PENIS!"
"Is there something wrong, mate?" A different voice, not his! Weird to hear someone else talk. It was moustache man...and a girl! A girl was with him, hot, sexy...well, no, she was average, painfully average, not fit for Johnny Nose.
"Paintfully average, not fit for Johnny Nose...hehe, not fit. You're not fit!" He tried to skip away, but moustache man was holding him.
"Is there someone who looks after you?"
"YEAH, MY PAL JESUS, HE DIED ON THE SINS FOR MY CROSS, OKAY JIMMINY!" Moustache man was so confused by this that he released his grip and Johnny skipped away...well, it was more like a run.
"Home, home, home for more meat, ARR, penis...fit, fit...girls...you all betrayed me...only the cow is on my side...I'm not mad, I just talk that way...all a character, all part of being Johnny Nose...but I AM Johnny Nose AND I'M BETTER THAN YOU! HEHEHEHE, FISH, FISH, FIIIIISH! YEAH, YOU POINT, IT'S NOT HURTING MY RIBS, NOTHING HURTS, NOTHING, I'M JOHNNY NOSE AND I RUN THIS TOWN I RUN THIS REALITY I THINK MORE THAN YOU EVER THINK YOU COULD THINK...THINK ON THAT!"
This time, the car did hit him.
