CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
Various movies mostly from 2012 that I watched over the FESTIVE PERIOD that don't already have or deserve their own thread.
Men In Black 3 - Remember when Men In Black was a FUCKING HUGE DEAL and had a song by Will Smith that was also A FUCKING HUGE DEAL and it was even okay for adults to like it because it was actually pretty good? Well, now it's just something to distract me from suicidal thoughts for 90 minutes. I want to say "well, it was better than Men In Black 2!" since that one seems to be regarded as the worst, but I don't remember ever watching Men In Black 2. This one has time travel and it doesn't follow its own time travel rules and that annoys me. I mean I know it's a kids movie but at least be consistent! Josh Brolin is a good choice as young Tommy Lee Jones (even though the ages don't add up), the sidekick alien was a charming character, the villain was lame...I pretty much forgot the movie as soon as it was over. I cannot recommend this movie to anyone, but it wasn't actually actively bad or anything so if you're ever forced to watch it with young relatives or something at least you'll know that it's not terrible.
Ted - So I don't really like Seth MacFarlane things. I haven't watched Family Guy for years and I don't count American Dad (WHICH IS GOOD) as a Seth MacFarlane thing as he isn't really invovled in it (other than voicing half the characters.) BUT I remembered Ted getting "it's actually pretty good!" reviews and...and it's actually quite okay/good. Better than the last Family Guy I remember watching anyway. It does have the usual Seth MacFarlene probablems: there's a couple of terrible cutaways (seriously what was the point of the parody of Airplane other than to remind people that Airplane was a much funnier movie than this?) and some of the humour just goes for shocking rather than funny. But...some of it is pretty funny. The best parts are actually the parts with Ted and Mark Wahlberg interacting because, IF NOTHING ELSE, Seth is a talented voice actor and Mark Wahlberg can convincingly play man talking to a living teddy bear. And there's a Patrick Stewart voiceover and Joel McHale and Mila Kunis. So yeah...mild recommendation! Or strong recommendation if you actually still watch Family Guy. NOT BAD.
21 Jump Street - Again I was hesitant with this as I sometimes don't like these MODERN comedies that everyone seems to find hilarious...but this turned out good! At the start I wasn't really feeling it as it seemed to rely on characters saying things like "suck my dick!" and doing a funny chance while repeating "suck my dick!", but once it actually got going I enjoyed it and got into it. It just gets more bizarre and surreal as it goes on and I actually laughed (more than at Ted) quite a few times. And WHO KNEW that Channing Tatum was actually awesome? (Probably everyone already found that out last year.) Also fun Johnny Depp cameo! I'd recommend this even if you think you'd hate it because you might not! RIOTOUSLY ENTERTAINING!
50/50 - It's a comedy about Joseph Goden-Levitt with cancer. It's good! JGL puts in a strong perforrmance as usual and it's quite touching and sometimes funny. I mean I don't think it was amazingly great or anything, but I enjoyed it. The "evil girlfriend" character played by Bryce Dallas Howard was a bit too evil though, as they could have done her in a more realistic way but in the end just kind of made her a bit too much of a movie character. But that didn't detract too much. Also Anna Kendrick WAS A DELIGHT as the nice girl. EIGHT THUMBS UP OUT OF TEN.
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter - This wasn't good. It's not serious but it's not a comedy either. It's just a thing. It tries to cover his whole life AND have a vampire plot...all in about 90 minutes. Nothing really has much impact or anything. There's some of those CGI, start and stop slow motiony videogamey action scenes that every mediocre action movie seems to have these days. GIVE IT A MISS.
Men In Black 3 - Remember when Men In Black was a FUCKING HUGE DEAL and had a song by Will Smith that was also A FUCKING HUGE DEAL and it was even okay for adults to like it because it was actually pretty good? Well, now it's just something to distract me from suicidal thoughts for 90 minutes. I want to say "well, it was better than Men In Black 2!" since that one seems to be regarded as the worst, but I don't remember ever watching Men In Black 2. This one has time travel and it doesn't follow its own time travel rules and that annoys me. I mean I know it's a kids movie but at least be consistent! Josh Brolin is a good choice as young Tommy Lee Jones (even though the ages don't add up), the sidekick alien was a charming character, the villain was lame...I pretty much forgot the movie as soon as it was over. I cannot recommend this movie to anyone, but it wasn't actually actively bad or anything so if you're ever forced to watch it with young relatives or something at least you'll know that it's not terrible.
Ted - So I don't really like Seth MacFarlane things. I haven't watched Family Guy for years and I don't count American Dad (WHICH IS GOOD) as a Seth MacFarlane thing as he isn't really invovled in it (other than voicing half the characters.) BUT I remembered Ted getting "it's actually pretty good!" reviews and...and it's actually quite okay/good. Better than the last Family Guy I remember watching anyway. It does have the usual Seth MacFarlene probablems: there's a couple of terrible cutaways (seriously what was the point of the parody of Airplane other than to remind people that Airplane was a much funnier movie than this?) and some of the humour just goes for shocking rather than funny. But...some of it is pretty funny. The best parts are actually the parts with Ted and Mark Wahlberg interacting because, IF NOTHING ELSE, Seth is a talented voice actor and Mark Wahlberg can convincingly play man talking to a living teddy bear. And there's a Patrick Stewart voiceover and Joel McHale and Mila Kunis. So yeah...mild recommendation! Or strong recommendation if you actually still watch Family Guy. NOT BAD.
21 Jump Street - Again I was hesitant with this as I sometimes don't like these MODERN comedies that everyone seems to find hilarious...but this turned out good! At the start I wasn't really feeling it as it seemed to rely on characters saying things like "suck my dick!" and doing a funny chance while repeating "suck my dick!", but once it actually got going I enjoyed it and got into it. It just gets more bizarre and surreal as it goes on and I actually laughed (more than at Ted) quite a few times. And WHO KNEW that Channing Tatum was actually awesome? (Probably everyone already found that out last year.) Also fun Johnny Depp cameo! I'd recommend this even if you think you'd hate it because you might not! RIOTOUSLY ENTERTAINING!
50/50 - It's a comedy about Joseph Goden-Levitt with cancer. It's good! JGL puts in a strong perforrmance as usual and it's quite touching and sometimes funny. I mean I don't think it was amazingly great or anything, but I enjoyed it. The "evil girlfriend" character played by Bryce Dallas Howard was a bit too evil though, as they could have done her in a more realistic way but in the end just kind of made her a bit too much of a movie character. But that didn't detract too much. Also Anna Kendrick WAS A DELIGHT as the nice girl. EIGHT THUMBS UP OUT OF TEN.
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter - This wasn't good. It's not serious but it's not a comedy either. It's just a thing. It tries to cover his whole life AND have a vampire plot...all in about 90 minutes. Nothing really has much impact or anything. There's some of those CGI, start and stop slow motiony videogamey action scenes that every mediocre action movie seems to have these days. GIVE IT A MISS.
