I've got a problem...

[Goblin]

Okay, here it is.

For the last month, I've had a personal goal. I've been trying to ejaculate over two feet.

That's it. Two measley feet. My goal is to hit the mirror in the bathroom. At least a drop or two.

That's it.

But it's just not happening...I've tried waiting a week or so, I've tried holding my piss for a while and then stroking off right after peeing.

But I'm coming short, pun intended.

Got any recommendations?

 

[Sarek]

Yes.

Please don't breed.

 

[jack]

You have to squeeze the base on the upstroke.

 

[Dracula]

Here's a tip, Gobs.

Get a quarter slice of watermelon at the store.

Dig out a hole.

Hump the watermelon, then when you're about to blow, pull out, stick a finger up your ass, and then jack off.

You'll hit your target.

 

[Goblin]

Thanks, Drac. That sounds interesting.

I have a pumpkin left over from Halloween...would that work?

 

[Kitty]

At best, youre an idiot.

Here's a suggestion.
Set REAL goals for yourself.

 

[Zombie Superman]

^^^This from a guy with an avatar of a cat shooting people from a window.

Yeah, that's real funny. Making light of sniper killings.

Bravo.

At least Goblin here is doing something that won't hurt anyone.

Well, maybe himself, if he starts to chafe...

 

[Sarek]

Oh god.

It's "Clash Of The Morons" and I'm stuck in a front row seat.

 

[Kitty]

^^^This from a guy with an avatar of a cat shooting people from a window.

Yeah, that's real funny. Making light of sniper killings.

Bravo.

At least Goblin here is doing something that won't hurt anyone.

Well, maybe himself, if he starts to chafe...

Youre right! An avatar of a cat FICTIONALLY sniping ppl is much worse than some idiot tryin to cum on his bathroom mirror.

That guy should try shootin a load into your mouth to shut you the fuck up. At least then he'll be doing somethin of possitive consequence after all.

 

[Zombie Superman]

Awww, did da widdle boy who has the kitty wit da gun get upset?

Diddums he lose his widdle temper? Diddum his widdle feewings get hurt?

Aww...

 

[Falconarg]

 

[jack]

Alright, which one of you is the Pivot Person?

 

[Cacophony]

Oh lawd, the duals...

 

[Falconarg]

Youre right! An avatar of a cat FICTIONALLY sniping ppl is much worse than some idiot tryin to cum on his bathroom mirror.

That guy should try shootin a load into your mouth to shut you the fuck up. At least then he'll be doing somethin of possitive consequence after all.

 

[Kitty]

Awww, did da widdle boy who has the kitty wit da gun get upset?

Diddums he lose his widdle temper? Diddum his widdle feewings get hurt?

Aww...

Again, a stupid response.

The old fashoined cry baby copy/pasted retort. Try harder, maybe Ill stay interested.

 

[Sarek]

I bet this is what the Oval office is like late every night.

One lone moron talking to himself. And answering.

 

[Falconarg]

I bet this is what the Oval office is like late every night.

One lone moron talking to himself. And answering.

 

[Goblin]

Just used one of my girlfriend's vibrators (vibrating ducky) on my balls and my anus.

Got close to the mirror, but fell short by at least six inches...

I'll keep you guys posted..

And yeah, that's Alison Angel's wonderful bum.

 

[Sarek]

No, actually, it's Bill the cat.

But hey, it's still pussy. I guess.

 

[bad dog]

Okay, here it is.

For the last month, I've had a personal goal. I've been trying to ejaculate over two feet.

That's it. Two measley feet. My goal is to hit the mirror in the bathroom. At least a drop or two.

That's it.

But it's just not happening...I've tried waiting a week or so, I've tried holding my piss for a while and then stroking off right after peeing.

But I'm coming short, pun intended.

Got any recommendations?

Just stick one thumb in your mouth and the other in your asshole, count 1 , 2 , 3 and switch places realy fast. do it again and again.

I hope that helps.