CaptainWacky: Defender of the Mine Field Season 1

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
GOOD SEXINESS.
 

Dr Dave

pillzlol
Episode 7: Mouse Trap

The disco party concluded, and the next day the USS Sexy Pants approached The Planet of Mice.

"Sir, I'm not detecting any ships in the area" said Lt.FBI Part Due

"There is a residual impulse signature in the area" noted Lt. Fuddlemiff

"Somethings not right, sheilds up, arm weapons, YELLOISH alert!" commanded CaptainWacky

"Continual scans of the area Mr.Fuddle" said Commander Cassie

"Aye sir" replied Lt.Fuddlemiff

Commander Cassie gave Lt.Fuddlemiff her MAD FACE

"Full stop Mr.Gagh" said CaptainWacky

"AYE AYE AYE!" said Ensign Gagh

Suddenly a ship appeared, then two, then 3, THEY WERE CLOAKED!

"RED ALERT!" said CaptainWacky

Suddenly the ship shook as it was hit at MULTIPLE ANGLES!

"Sir, ships cable tv just went out" said Lt.Fuddlemiff

"BASTARFUCKS!!! FIRE AT WILL!" shouted CaptainWacky

To be continued...
 

Cassie

Touching the monolith
Staff member
WHAT WILL WE DO WITHOUT CABLE TV IN SPACE?
 

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
There should be an officer named Will who everyone fires at (not really.)
 

Dr Dave

pillzlol
Episode 8: Seph Part II

The ship shook as it was hit by more weapons fire, but that did not detour Ensign Seph from his mission. Seph went directly to medical to visit and "council" Nurse Tisiphone.

"Hello...baby" said Seph

"Seph, I'm kinda busy" said Tisiphone looking around to all the wounded crewman, adding "Dr Dave is in engineering, something exploded, I'm manning the store ALL ALONE, god I could cut a bitch..."

"I'm here to council you, that or BREAT SOMEBODIES PATELLAS!" said Seph

"It hurts!" said the patient Nurse Tisiphone was treating

"I've given you pain meds Ensign" replied Nurse Tisiphone

"No this crappy plot line...seriously Seph dosen't act like this...this is just DUMBER THEN 9 DUMB PIES!" said the Ensign

Seph leaped up and shattered both his patellas.

"Fuck this!" said Seph as he left he kicked over Loktar who was tied to a park bench in Medical.

...

"Shields at 40%" said Lt.FBI Part Due

"We need a new stratagy...deploy...The Rebeca Black cannon!" said CaptainWacky

"Aye sir, deploying now!" replied Lt.FBI Part Due

To be continued...
 

Dr Dave

pillzlol
Epsiode 9 (not episode 6, don't believe the rumors about it): The Ultimate Weapon

The USS Sexy Pants took anouther hit.

"Sheilds at 27%!" said Lt.FBI Part Due

"Status of Rebeca Black cannon?" asked CaptainWacky

"Ready to fire..." replied FBI a look of concern in his eyes.

"FIRE!" shouted CaptainWacky

The other ship suddenly exploded.

"My god...they hit their self destruct..." said Lt. Fuddlemiff

"They did what any crew would do when faced with this ultimate weapon" Said CaptainWacky

"Sir, enginering reports massive casualties...including...Tomtrek!" said headvoid

"You have the bridge number one...ahhh just as soon as this vagina massage is over" said CaptainWacky

"Aye sir" replied Commander Cassie, as she winked.

To be continued...
 

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
I love that they'd rather blow themselves up than be shot by the Rebecca Black cannon!
 

Dr Dave

pillzlol
Episode 10: Loss

CaptainWacky left the bridge to attend to IMPORTANT MATTERS (checking on the casualties then wanking), commander Cassie had the bridge.

"Commander...I don't know how to say this..." stuttered Lt.Fuddlemiff

"Out with it!" she demanded

"Mam.. it's your quarters, the last blast caused a hull breach...Captain Kirk has been lost...to SPACE." replied Lt.Fuddlemiff

"They're lucky they're dead...Or all they're COCKS WOULD BE MINE!" shouted Commander Cassie

...

In medical Dr Dave was attending to Tomtrek.

"What happend?" asked CaptainWacky

"Sanaptic pathway overload, he was running a diagonstic when somehow he was blasted with 10,000 Michelle Trachtenberg images at once" said Dr Dave

"My GAWD!" said Captainwacky doing an impression of a famous wrestleing anouncer

"Yes, the mind can only handle 5,000 max of the MT, all that Trachtenberg was just too much for him..." replied Dr Dave

"Will be be alright?" asked CaptainWacky

"Only time will tell..." replied Dr Dave

To be continued...
 

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
COCKS
 

Dr Dave

pillzlol
Episode 11: Old Man Dr Dave

The USS Sexy Pants resumed course. Most of the crew were JOLLY like mice at a cheese shop. The damage had been repaired, the cable and ships internet restored. Dr Dave and some of the others were having a party to celebrate Season 4 of Cat Cleaners being finally downloaded into the ships computer.

"Man, I wish I could clean a cat!" said Lt.Fuddlemiff

"Well Tomtrek is still unconsuous, why don't you go give him a sponge bath!" said Dr Dave

"COULD I?" replied Lt. Fuddlemiff

"Go on lad, get er' dun!" said Dr Dave

Lt.headvoid laughed once Fuddlemiff left

"What's so funny?" asked Dr Dave

"Oh you know, Tomtrek hates sponges, he's sure to wake up from that coma...and you know what happend to the last fellow who woke Tomtrek from a coma" said Lt.headvoid

"Yeah, well that's what Fuddlemiff gets for tossing condoms at the tv when ever he saw Jock, plus Tomtrek does need to get cleaned. People never question how people get clean when they're unconssous for days on a star ship..." said Dr Dave, clearly in ramble mode.

"Old Man Dr Dave!" laughed Lt.headvoid

To be continued...
 

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
So that's how to wake Tomtrek!
 

Tisiphone

Elitist Redheaded Trollop
I think we should all write little TK MF stories, pool them together and SELL THEM TO THE MASSES
 

Dr Dave

pillzlol
Episode 12: Tomtrek Trouble

Lt.Fuddlemiff arrived in sick bay to give Tomtrek his sponge bath.

"I'm here to bath Chief Engineer Tomtrek!" he shouted with glee.

"Err, well alright...I'll be far far away" said Nurse Tisiphone as she made a quick escape

"How strange..." pondered Lt.Fuddlemiff as he found the sponge bath equipment.

As Lt.Fuddlemiff started his bathing of Tomtrek, suddenly Tomtrek woke up.

"FECK OFF!" he shouted and hit Lt.Fuddlemiff with a Tricorder.

"Ouch,hey sit back down and take your bath!" said Fuddlemiff

"MURDERS, ASSASIANS, SPONGES!" shouted Tomtrek as he knocked Fuddlemiff over and rushed outside.

"You forgot your pants sir!" shouted Lt.Fuddlemiff

...

On the bridge

"Commander, Lt.Fuddlemiff reports Tomtrek has gone space mad...oh lord, after he tried to give Tomtrek a sponge bath" said Lt.FBI Part Due

"Security alert, all decks, apprehend Chief Engineer Tomtrek, he may have gone space mad" said Commander Cassie. Looking at Lt.FBI Part Due she said "You're with me, Mr.Gagh you have the bridge, inform the captain of the issue"

"AYE!" replied Ensign Gagh

To be continued...
 

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
Solid writing.
 
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