Gwyneth Paltrow

[CaptainWacky]

Does Will I Am judge literally every one of these type of show.

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

And didn't Gwyneth leave GOOP?

 

[CaptainWacky]

She is the living soul of GOOP.

 

[SAUSAGEMAN]

"Le GOOP, c'est moi" - Queen Gwyneth I

 

[headvoid]

I have managed to avoid anything to do with Planet of the Apps yet. I keep on seeing videos autostart and I scrabble at the mouse / screen like my mother has just caught me watching porn.

It's a battle, but the PR machine is fading so I think I may have won.

 

[CaptainWacky]

She's well fit.

 

[headvoid]

Does one of the 3 moves involve surgery?

 

[CaptainWacky]

WASH YOUR MOUTH OUT (with vegan soap.)

 

[CaptainWacky]

GOOP TO SAVE PRINT AS A MEDIUM. http://wwd.com/business-news/media/gwyneth-paltrow-goop-magazine-anna-wintour-10876897/

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

Let's watch as this plays out pretty much how we all think it will.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Who will play the Gwyenth inspired character in the Devil Wears Prada sequel...

 

[SAUSAGEMAN]

come on

it's one hundo p Blake Lively

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

Gwyneth Paltrow Finally Admits the Truth About Goop: 'I Don't Know What the Fuck We Talk About'

A Perfect Murder star Gwyneth Paltrow was on Jimmy Kimmel’s talk show Monday night, and the two spent a large chunk of time discussing Goop, her nearly 10-year-old company that Paltrow calls her “full-time job.” After beginning with a few compliments (“I like the cooking stuff, and I like to see you on vacation”), Kimmel moves on to the site’s much-maligned wellness section.

First, he asks about “Earthing,” the practice of walking around barefoot in order to...actually I’m not sure, and neither is Gwyneth.

“So one of the things we like to do on Goop is find what the alternative world says about feeling good in the modern-day world. So, earthing—I don’t actually know that much about earthing, and it came out of me not knowing anything about earthing but hearing about it. They say that we lost touch with sort of being barefoot in the earth, and there’s some sort of electromagnetic thing that we’re missing. It’s good to take your shoes off in the grass.”

Though she almost makes it through that non-explanation worthy of a participation ribbon at Ronald Reagan Middle School’s annual science fair, Paltrow ultimately can’t hold in her laughter and eventually admits, “I don’t know what the fuck we talk about!”

After Kimmel reads something from Goop about how “squatting” while urinating is good for you, she admits (with another laugh), “I don’t know! I’ve never read that before!”
While it’s thrilling to hear her admit—or at least come close to admitting—that her “full-time job” is peddling pseudoscience (she really is a charmer!!), it doesn’t change the fact that plenty of Goop’s readers will do whatever she tells them to do, even if she doesn’t do those things herself. Case in point: those dreaded Jade Eggs.

“So, the Jade Egg is an ancient Chinese practice where women insert the Jade Egg in their lady parts to help tone the pelvic floor,” Paltrow says.

Kimmel is baffled. “How does it help do that?”

“I don’t know,” Paltrow says for the third time, adding:

“I need to start the Jade Egg practice! Women have actually had incredible results. It acts as a small weight, so I suppose it tones the pelvic floor, and there are women who are really good at practicing this, and they say it’s good for balancing hormones and all kinds of amazing benefits.”

Goop: We Don’t Know What This Does, But Shove It Up There Anyway.

 

[CaptainWacky]

She's a hero.

 

[SAUSAGEMAN]

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

And yet she couldn't hold on to Brad Pitt.

 

[The Question]

Goop: We Don’t Know What This Does, But Shove It Up There Anyway.

QOTFW

 

[Cassie]

I reckon you could save a few bucks and use an old fashioned enema filled with some Folgers.

 

[CaptainWacky]

As long as you know what you're doing!

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

Jeebus bean-grinding christmas.