Have you ever seduced a chick...

[jack]

What's a "forty"? Is that ebonics for consuming mass quantities of a malt beverage?

 

[Kefka]

40 ounce beer.

 

[obsidian]

I once seduced myself. Took myself out to dinner and a movie. Things were going great -- in the middle of the picture, I couldn't help but notice that my hand was resting on my thigh. And when it got to the scary part, I jumped into my arms and trembled like a frightened kitten, which gave me the opportunity to cuddle with myself.

Later, I took myself out dancing and I got even closer to myself, if ya know what I mean. Well, I was having a great time when I walked myself over to the bar and started buying myself drinks. Needless to say, things went without a hitch, and before I knew it, I'd taken me back to my place. I think you know how the story goes from there.

I can't find the transcript of it, but this immediately reminded me of the intro monologue to "Better Off Without A Wife" on Tom Waits's Nighthawks at the Diner.. Classic.

 

[starguard]

...by telling her yer gonna get her a heroin fix?

And after you fucked her, told her to get the fuck out cause she's a doped up whore!??

And then laughed when she threatened to kill you?

Just askin'.

No. but Ive had women do ME like that a few times :huh:

 

[Gagh]

SHUT THE FUCK UP HENOCH!

Shut the fuck up, Sarek.

 

[The Question]

SHUT THE FUCK UP TQ!

 

[Conchaga]

turn the heat up in your apartment to uncomfortable levels to make them strip their clothes.