I need some convincing lies to tell the interviewer on Monday

[Gagh]

Tell them this is you

 

[CaptainWacky]

You haven't received any orders and you most certainly did not just enjoy this delicious plump-breasted pigeon.

 

[Gagh]

Convince them you are 'on some kind of....'Star Trek''

 

[CaptainWacky]

Say you like Technology "A HELL OF A LOT", Massachusetts "nearly as much" and "certain types" of Institute more than Massachusetts but less than technology.

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

The movie Forrest Gump was a ripoff of your REAL LIFE but you can't say any more because of ongoing litigation.

You have mastered no less than 3 spells from the Harry Potter books, and if you get the gig you'll let them know which ones. (And if you don't get the gig, they'll find out which ones THE HARD WAY)

 

[CaptainWacky]

Just walk in, say "don't believe the hype," sit slouched on the chair wearing a hat at a jaunty angle, smile knowingly and nod seemingly at random and they'll be so intrigued that they'll have no choice but to let you in!

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

Be rich, and bribe them.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Be rich and get them drunk on whisky then go to the biotech lab.

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

Mmm...Jameson's and soda.

Pity I'm fresh out of both.

 

[FBI parte due]

Be attractive, and sex them OH WAIT

 

[CaptainWacky]

I don't suppose any of these lies were convincing...

 

[FBI parte due]

There's still time to find out yet!

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

You just might be able to use the "pi" one...especially if any of the faculty are getting faith-based grants.

 

[CaptainWacky]

 

[Cassie]

Yoda's GQ photo shoot?

 

[CaptainWacky]

Yaddle!

 

[Henoch]

AS TITLE

i always like to say i'm a team player...that's usually a convincing lie.

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

I can't decide if that's more Dick Cavett or Linda Hunt.

 

[Cassie]

FBI should be using our helpful and convincing lies today. OH HE'LL GET INTO MIT FOR SURE!

 

[CaptainWacky]

GOOD LUCK WITH THE INTERVIEW BY THE WAY!!! (It's probably too late to say that now.)