What's new
Troll Kingdom

This is a sample guest message. Register a free account today to become a member! Once signed in, you'll be able to participate on this site by adding your own topics and posts, as well as connect with other members through your own private inbox!

Make up more lies about the McCanns thread

25) Sarek fucked off with her.
 
26) there is no Maddy, only Zool
 
27) A waiter who may or may not have worked at the resort at the time of the disapperance described Kate as "cold" two days before the abduction. "Her daughter was two days away from being abducted, but it was like she didn't even care! She was just acting like normal, even though in two days her daughter would be gone! It didn't make no sense!"

28) Kate barely even noticed when Maddy was born. When the doctor told her it was a girl and asked if she wanted to hold it, Kate said "Meh, I'll check on it in four hours." When the doctor asked Gerry if he wanted to cut the cord he said "four hours!" and went back to his Game Boy.

29) Kate often says that Gerry was "taller when she first met him" to guests at dinner parties then laughs uncontrollably, while Gerry just kind of shuffle his feet awkwardly. No one knows why.

3) Gerry thinks about Avril Lavigne whenever he makes love to Kate.
 
31) Kate isn't sure if Gerry is really Maddy's father, she had an affair with Jerry Springer at the time of Maddy's conception. Maddy was kidnapped by Maury for a "WHO'S MY DADDY"? spring DNA extravaganza. Jerry hit Maury in the head with a steel chair and stole Maddy away from him. It's rumored that Jerry and Maddy are getting to know each other somewhere in California.
 
32) Maddy started the fires in California and is being hidden for her own protection.
 
33) Kate refuses to watch Eastenders since Bobby Davro joined the cast.

34) Gerry applied for membership of the Honky Elders forum.
 
35) Kate and Gerry want to start a blue peter appeal, and when enough kids send in bottle tops, they will reveal what really happened to Maddy
 
36) Kate and Gerry created an ice cream company called KATE AND GERRY'S they accidentally added Maddy to a batch of choccy crunch. The ice cream quickly sold out and the public never suspected a thing. One customer was heard to say "I don't know how they made it so crunchy, but I LOVE IT!!"
 
37) Kate and Gerry are good parents
 
cassieSassyPants said:
Kate and Gerry created an ice cream company called KATE AND GERRY'S they accidentally added Maddy to a batch of choccy crunch. The ice cream quickly sold out and the public never suspected a thing. One customer was heard to say "I don't know how they made it so crunchy, but I LOVE IT!!"
Click to expand...


That was ME!

uh. oh.
Maybe THAT's how I got my tummy ache. :(
 
38) Gerry is really a robot driving instructor from the future.
 
39) Gerry and Kate only ever had two children. Maddy was in fact a stray midget who became part of the family over the course of a few months. When Madison made known his wish to return to the circus, the McCann's threatened to send him to hell... A BRITISH EX PAT COMMUNITY IN SPAIN
 
40) Kate McCann rang up George Lucas suggesting he send her "A MILLION FUCKING BUCKS TO HELP US FIND MADDY, PLEASE" but he politely declined.
 
41) Kate McCann is actually CU of TK

42) Kate McCann helped Janet Reno kidnap Elian Gonzalez. To repay the favor, Reno is hiding Madeline Mccann in a pinball machine somewhere in south Jersey.
 
43) Gerry draws pictures of dragons eating little blond girls but won't show anyone.

44) How can you tell Kate McCann is insincere? Her lips are moving! Or tears are running down her face. Or tears are NOT running down her face. Or she's eating ice cream. Or...
 
45) Gerry has been known to call Madeline by the name of Jon Bona on occasion.
 
Maddy wasn't the one who was abducted. It was US.
 
47) The McCann's are pleased the clocks go back tonight as it "gives them an extra hour to find little Maddy".

48) Little Maddy has had a growth spurt since being abducted and is now 5'8 and unrecognisable.
 
49) Madeline McCann is currently in Chicago co-directing The Dark Knight with Christopher Nolan.
 
50) Gerry has offered to help Joss Whedon finish his next Astonishing X-Men issue quicker since "it's not like I'm doing anything else right now!"
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top