My neighbour's wheely bin is heavy

[Fuddlemiff]

Like, dead body heavy.

Actually, it's my wheely bin, but they decided to dump a whole lotta somethin in it anyway.

 

[Ishcabittle]

Snag the body, that's lunch!

 

[Cassie]

What's a wheely bin?!

 

[Ishcabittle]

It's one of those garbage bin thingings.

 

[CaptainWacky]

On wheels.

 

[Cassie]

OH

I'd be pissed if my neighbors were putting their trash in my garbage thingamabob without asking.

KILL THEM AND PUT THEM IN THE WHEELY BIN!

 

[Ishcabittle]

THEN IT WILL BE A SELF FULFILLING PROPHECY FOR REEAL

 

[curiousa2z]

^^but there's ALREADY a dead body in the wheely bin!!!!

 

[Fuddlemiff]

It's heavy enough already! If it gets any heavier the dustbin men(AKA garbage men) will get suspicious!

Snag the body, that's lunch!

Good idea, I won't have to go to the supermarket tomorrow!

 

[curiousa2z]

HAVE YOU GOT ANY CHIANTI?

 

[Fuddlemiff]

GOD DAMNIT!

*goes back to writing shopping list*

 

[CaptainWacky]

I remember the days before we had wheely bins and it makes me wonder why no one thought of JSUT PUTTING WHEELS ON BINS.

 

[Cassie]

and fava beans

 

[Ishcabittle]

YOU CAN'T PUT A FAVA BEAN ON A WHEELY BIN, THEY'LL GET CRUSHED AND THEN YOU'RE RIGHT BACK TO BARBARISM.

 

[Fuddlemiff]

I remember the days before we had wheely bins and it makes me wonder why no one thought of JSUT PUTTING WHEELS ON BINS.

And hinges on the lids and fifty bazillion bins per household so every known substance can be recycled seperately.

 

[CaptainWacky]

WHo can take the trash out!
Stomp it down for you!
Something something cat poo,
The Garbage man can!

 

[Cassie]

We have a big two yard dumpster. You can fit at least 15 bodies in there.. the trash man doesn't even get out of his truck!

 

[Mentalist]

If you have a dead body you can't get rid of then here are some tips:

Drag it into the bathroom and string it up over the bath by its feet. Cut the throat and let the blood drain out of the body. After that process is finished dismember the body and chop it up into pizza sized servings and wrap each part in a plastic bag. Then take all your wrapped body parts and put them in a bin liner (double bag it) and leave it out for the dustman to take away.


Works every time.



I imagine...

 

[Fuddlemiff]

Mmm, but then if I ever become a suspect for the death and the police get a warrant, there'll be traces of blood in the bath and all down the pipes. Maybe it'd be more practical to siphon the blood off into milk bottles or something.

I'll ask next door.

 

[Cassie]

Use lots of bleach! And draino, and other chemicals. Then run the water for hours and hours to wash it all away.