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Starbucks Barista Whores

Hambil

Hambil

I AM A GOLDEN GOD
This is how they get you - we discussed this in the chatroom and I thought it was worth bringing to everyone's attention, lest you be tricked like so many others.

Pretty young Baristas who smile and pretend they like you while selling you a $50 cup of coffee. Maybe they flirt a little with another pretty Barista so you start thinking lesbian sex and suddenly you're buying another $50 latte.

They don't really like you - you're being used. Starbucks has special training for these whores.

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The problem is you're paying $50 instead of like $5.
 
They don't get me, because I hate coffee.
 
Ok, here is the thing.

#1. I have not experienced pretty young baristas at every starbucks I go to. There is one near my work that seems to have alot of old people. I don't care, make my fucking coffee and we are good.

#2. In non starbucks places I go to-mostly drive ups-I do appreciate a pleasant cute girl or guy serving me coffee-I will tip them a $ if they are sweet.

#3. Sometimes I just want them to shut the fuck up and make my god dammed coffee already.

#4. I am difficult to please.

#5. When I watch a cute girl ignore me because she thinks I won't tip, but then give extra special attention to the man in the next window I get annoyed-she is correct no tip from me stupid slut!!!!!!
 
Hambil, or anyone else for that matter-Have you been to Cowgirls? Or the coffee places where the baristas where lingerie? I went to one Bikini Barista coffee place-and I was like "OH please put some clothes on" The girls serving coffee looked like little boys with thier straight figures. Srsly
And if they are going to be doing that-where is the eye candy for the woman? Maybe a coffee shop where the guys serving coffee are in tight jeans and no shirt?
W/E I really just want my coffee-I don't need to get all horny before going to work.

Please.
 
I SUDDENLY FEEL LIKE GETTING A $50 CUP OF COFFEE.
 
ABORT ABORT!
 
What got me were the milk dispensers.
 
The boys are terrible flirts and the girls don't "flirt" with me, obviously but are always sweeter than the boys and less distracted.
 
What about Batista Whores?
 
This reminds me; I was watching a local news story about that one bikini barrista place that got robbed, and they kept showing the security cam footage of the robbery. You know, an excuse for local news to show footage of a young girl in a bikini over and over. Then they try to make it a feel-good thing by explaining that the police arrived on the scene so fast because, because the manager had the security cam footage streaming onto his home computer and was watching the holdup from home.
 
Here is a link:

Camera Rolls During Bikini Barista Robbery

Monday, January 5, 2009 – updated: 11:38 am PST January 5, 2009

TACOMA, Wash. -- Police are looking for a man who robbed a Pierce County bikini barista at gunpoint on Saturday while cameras were recording. The barista is the same woman who threw hot water on a man who exposed himself at the stand last summer.

The robbery occurred Saturday night at Java Girls just south of the Tacoma city limits on Pacific Avenue.

The stand is outfitted with several security cameras.

Barista Kiley Ross told KIRO 7 Eyewitness News that a car pulled up, two men ordered coffee and as she delivered the drinks, one man pulled a gun and demanded money.

Ross' boss was at home watching the surveillance live, so by the time the barista called him, police were already on their way.

"He wouldn't show his face. He kept his arm by his face because he probably noticed the cameras," said Ross.

The owner of Java Girls is offering a $500 reward to anyone who can help track down the robber.
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Bolding mine. Pervertedness his.
 
let's get one thing straight.

a barista is a coffee expert who knows how to pull espresso. the work espresso machines, the kind where you have to grind and tamp the coffee by hand. when they pull a shot, they are trying to extract only the most tasty espresso from the grinds, often discarding poorly pulled or old shots. any espresso left to rest for longer than 30 seconds after the pull is discarded.

the people at starbucks are button pushers. they press the button marked "2 shots" and then pour the swill that comes out into burnt milk. they are not baristas.
 
Ishcabittle said:
let's get one thing straight.

a barista is a coffee expert who knows how to pull espresso. the work espresso machines, the kind where you have to grind and tamp the coffee by hand. when they pull a shot, they are trying to extract only the most tasty espresso from the grinds, often discarding poorly pulled or old shots. any espresso left to rest for longer than 30 seconds after the pull is discarded.

the people at starbucks are button pushers. they press the button marked "2 shots" and then pour the swill that comes out into burnt milk. they are not baristas.
Click to expand...
Starbucks rejected you and now you work at Joe's Coffee?
 
Eat at Joes!
 
Hambil said:
Starbucks rejected you and now you work at Joe's Coffee?
Click to expand...

nope. i just know how coffee is supposed to taste. starbucks, especially now that it's all robospresso, ain't it.
 
Ah, Charbucks. Over-roasting their beans since who-the-fuck-cares.
 
Yeah, Starbucks over-roasts their beans. And all the ones I've been to in SoCal are staffed by twee emo boys, fat mexican girls, or tatooed dykey-lookin' chix. Or some combo of the above.

Meh, Dunkin' Donuts is the best. And I miss WaWa coffee too!
 
MOS EISLEY SPACEPORT HAS THE BEST COFFEE.
 
I just make my own coffee.
 
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