The Andorian Incident - Archer wants to stop at P'Jem, a Vulcan monastery. Phlox figures out that T'Pol doesn't want to be seen with humans. He reminds her of the Vulcan IDIC and...I'm not sure how T'Pol feels. Tim Russ could play Tuvok in such a way that you'd know how he felt without showing much emotion, but Jolene Blalock always just seems pissed off as T'Pol. Archer, T'Pol and Trip go down to the monastery (T'Pol says it's 3,000 years old, meaning Vulcans have been in space a really long time.) A monk asks them to leave, but T'Pol spots a statue perched at an odd angle(!) and notices the monk acting weird. Archer and Trip find an Andorian hiding behind a screen and tackle him, but more armed Andorians show up and lock them up with a bunch of Vulcans. The Andorians look cool and have antenna that move by themself! Their leader, Shran, is played by the great Jeffrey Combs and he suspects Archer of working with the Vulcans. Then hits him in the stomach. Another Andron says he'll enjoy "having" T'Pol...as a prisoner and I think that was supposed to sound like a rape threat? In Star Trek! T'Pol and the other Vulcans explain that the Andorians are paranoid assholes who think the Vulcans are going to invade their homeworld and that they're hiding a sensor array in the monastery. They've searched it before but are now even more suspicious because of the humans arriving (the Vulcans come across as asshoels here, because it's Enterprise.) Shran beats up Archer and asks him why he has a Vulcan science officer. Reed contacts Archer and finds out what's going on. The Anderians want the Enterprise to leave but Reed won't go. The Vulcans talk about how smelly the humans are. Archer is worried Reed is about to send an armed landing part down but luckily there's secret passages underneath the room they're all locked up in, leading to catacombs where there's a radio they can use to call for help.
Trip makes his way through the tunnels, passing mummified Vulcans. He gets back before the Andorians check on them, which is lucky. Archer invites T'Pol tell share his blanket and she deos so despite his smell. They debate a non-violent response versus fighting back as self defence. Trip manages to radio Reed and warn him not to send the boys in. Trip reports to Archer that he saw three holes in a wall down in the tunnel and Archer thinks they might match up to the eye and mouth holes in a big Vulcan face in a wall they saw earlier. Arccher pretends he has information for Shran but just waffles on a load of crap while the Andorians beat him up. It's all a ruse so he can throw a stone through the big face, then Trip can go back into the tunnel and find the stone to confirm what they suspected. Err, couldn't Trip have just LOOKED through the holes? There's light on the other side! He'd have been able to see the room. Archer did this for nothing. Reed and his lads reluctantly use the transporter to sneak in. They had behind the big face. The rapey Andorian says he's heard Vulcan women force their men to fight to the death and offers to kill for her. Reed and his bros finally spring into action but Shran escapes to the catacombs. The Vulcan priest just yells at Archer for tyring to save them. A younger Vulcan wants to help Archer fight Shran (to "protect the relics") so at least there's some hints of Vulcan depth there. There's more shooting before Archer discovers a hidden Vulcan sensor array in the catacombs. Yep, the Andorians were right all along! The young Vulcan threatens to blow Archer's head off but Archer punches him out (aren't Vulcans super strong?) T'Pol looks shocked and disappointed by it all so credit to Blalock there. Archer gives Shran all the details they've scanned of the array and has T'Pol give the order that they're allowed to leave. Shran tells Archer he's in his debt.
The thing everyone remembers about this episode is the ending. There's a reason for that: it's a great ending that elevates the rest of the episode. Wihtout it, the Andorians would have just bene mindless thugs. Archer punching out the Vulcan is satisfying given how annoying the Enterprise Vulcans are. But the body of the episode is a mixed bag. There's good stuff, like Archer and T;Pol's interections. But I'm not a big fan at all of the Vulcans just being total assholes all the time and moaning about how smelly humans are. I don't mind them having a hidden spy array, that's obviously settting up future stories and I'm totally cool with that, but make the such one dimensional twats is wearing thin. Jeffrey Combs is great but doesn't get much to do here as Shran execpt beat up Archer and sneer at Vulcans. Even though the Andorians turn out to be in the right they're still treated as typical hostile alien assholes and one of them seems to be a rapist, so I can't say I like them as characters yet. And the whole bit with the big stone face is so dumb. But yeah, that ending!
SCORE: 7.5/10
Breaking The Ice - The Enterprise discovers a comet. Archer wants to take a closer look even though T'Pol thiks comets are boring. Trip offers her some pecan pie but she's distracted by a letter. The comet contains a rare element so Archer prepares to land a shuttle on it. Vulcan Captain Vanik shows up in his ship just then. He says he's here to "observe" the humans. Archer's sick of Vulcans babysitting but agrees to let Vanik watch. Trip and Hoshi discover that T'Pol has received an encrypted message. Archer is disappointed that T'Pol is secretly talking to Vulcans behind his back and has Hoshi decrypt the message. Archer records a message answering questions from schoolchildren back on Earth. The questions are pretty dull until someone asks about the toilet. Archer wants Trip to answer and he's annoyed at getting a "poop question." This all goes on a bit long but I do like the idea that children on Earth are interested in Enterprise's mission. Reed and Travis make a snowman on the comet. Hoshi gives the decrypted letter to Trip to read. Trip tells Archer it's a personal letter and he'd rather not tell him the contents. Trip is angry at himself for reading it and thinks he should tell T'Pol. She makes him feel worse.
Reed and Mayweather turn their snowman into a Vulcan. They blow it up to blow a hole in the ice. Archer, T'Pol and Trip have dinner with guest Vanik. Vanik doesn't eat because he's already eaten. The conversation does't go well as Vanik just wants to sit there not eating. Archer gets bored and asks why Vanik is spying on them. He doesn't really get an answer. T'Pol talks to Trip about her personal situation as he's the only one onboard who knows about it. Her arranged marriage is due to happen soon and she'll have to leave the Enterprise if she wants it to go ahead. Trip asks her to use logic to make a decision. He wonders if she previously postponed the wedding because subconsciously she wants out of it. Travis hurts his leg. The comet rotates and faces the sun and starts to crack under them. They try to take off but the shuttle falls through the ice. The Enterprise tries to fish them out with their grappling hook but drops the shuttle further into the comet. T'Pol points out that Vanik could save them with his tractor beam. Archer doesn't want his help but realises he must swallow his pride and ask the Vulcan (T'Pol says this will show Vanik that humans aren't as prideful as he thinks.) The Vulcans rescue the shuttle. T'Pol sends a message to the Vulcan ship, presumably cancelling her marriage, then eats some pecan pie in her quarters.
It's the best episode yet, I'd say. It's a pretty light episode but all the stories are done fairly well. T'Pol is probably the most successful and she's finally starting to feel like a character. There's another Vulcan asshole Captain, yes, but at least there's a point to it with Archer accepting that the Vulcans really can help them. This is probably overly generous but...
(EDIT: Knocked 0.5 off the score because I'm a dick.)
SCORE: 7.510