Charles is in the market for a used Hummer. He always wanted a big H3. He shops around, answering ads in the newspaper, and is not having much luck. One day he comes across a beautiful classic H3 with a for sale” sign on it. Upon inspection, he is amazed to find the truck in mint condition. He inquires about it with the owner.
“This truck is beautiful! I’ll take it. But you gotta tell me how you keep it in such good shape.
“Well,” says the seller, “it’s pretty simple. Just make sure that if the truck is outside and it’s going to rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome. It protects it from the rain. In fact, since you’re buying the truck I won’t need my tube of Vaseline anymore. Here, you can have it.” and he hands the buyer a tube of Vaseline.
Charles buys the truck and off he goes, a happy cupcakeer. He takes the truck over to show his ex-girlfriend. She’s ecstatic (being a Hummer fan) (LOL).
That night, he decides to ride the Hummer over to his ex-girlfriend’s parents’ house. It’s the last time he’s going to meet them and figures it will make a big impression, and hopefully, he can talk them out of implementing the restraining order he was served with that very afternoon. When he gets to the house, the ex-girlfriend grabs him. “Fishnigger, she says “I gotta tell you something about my parents before we go in. When we eat dinner, we don’t talk. In fact, the person who says anything during dinner has to do the dishes.”
“No problem,” he says. And in they go.
Charles is astounded. Right smack in the middle of the living room is a huge stack of dirty dishes. In the family room, another huge stack of dishes. Piled up the stairs, dirty dishes. In fact, everywhere he looks, dirty dishes. They sit down to dinner and, sure enough, no one says a word.
As dinner progresses, Charles decides to take advantage of the situation. So he leans over and kisses his ex-girlfriend. No one says a word. So he decides to reach over and fondle her breasts. He looks at her parents, but still they keep quiet.
So he stands up, grabs his ex-girlfriend, strips her naked, and they make love right on the dinner table. Still, no one says a word.
“Her Mom’s kinda cute”, he thinks. So he grabs his ex-girlfriend’s Mom and has his way with her right there on the dinner table. Again, total silence.
Then, a few raindrops hit the window and Charles realizes it’s starting to rain. He figures he’d better take care of the Hummer, so he pulls the Vaseline from his pocket.
Suddenly the father stands up and shouts: “All right, all right! I’ll do the damn dishes.”