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Gems from Twitter

Florida Man ‏@_FloridaMan 39m39 minutes ago

Instead of Doing Chores, Florida Man Decapitates Mom With Ax | Florida Man Charged With Decapitating Mom With Ax - NBC News …

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I DON'T BELIEVE HE WOULD DO SUCH A THING, LOOK AT HIS SWEET FACE.
 
Please come visit me here at Tingle Tower again, where wonderful fairy magic makes the place spin and spin!
 
The Wind Waker @TWW_ebooks · 23h 23 hours ago

Match the seal on the envelope with the same icon on the shelf and throw the letter onto that shelf. Real easy. Simple.

This game is infuriating!
 
I was good at it!
 
YOU WOULD BE :rwmad:
 
Caitlin Stacey is perpetually angry, isn't she?
 
For good reasons!
 
nap sleeper ‏@map_keeper 21h21 hours ago

when a fruit is hotter than u

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@AnnieLowrey
Revvin' up your engine
Listen to her howlin' roar
Metal under tension Beggin' you to touch and go
HIGHWAY TO THE BIDEN ZONE
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BIDEN ZONE!
 
@ZekeJMiller

Biden: “Dick! How are you pal.” Durbin: Thanks for swearing us in. Biden chuckles: “It’s easy for us to swear at you”
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:D
 
Karen Hackett ‏@karen_hackett 11h11 hours ago

How to tell if ur dog is involved in a sex scandal

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I spent about an hour going through #foxnewsfacts tonight. There are some real zingers.

I'm actually going to Birmingham (or Birminglamb, as it's now known in the interests of not offending Muslims #foxnewsfacts) this week, so wish me luck inshallah.
 
Good luck!
 
Jason Mansfielde ‏@JasonMansfielde 2h2 hours ago

God answered my prayers RT @MikeyFresh1: Lmao Nancy Grace vs 2 Chainz Marijuana debate tonight ”

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