Michael Jackson died

[Hellbilly Jim]

"I can't wait to meet baby Jesus." - Michael Jackson

 

[Sarek]

I shut the TV off yesterday and haven't listened to the radio at all today.

Has Sharpten blamed this on the white man yet? I know Jesse Jackson's already grabbing a shovel and digging for a chance at some money.

 

[Dirk Funk]

If he hasn't he will be by the end of the week, at least.

 

[Sarek]

Unfucking believable. It's been 8 damn days since he kicked and it's still wall to wall fucking coverage.

We could nuke the entire middle eastern region and they'd pre-empt any coverage to discuss how long it would take his plastic enhanced corpse to finally deteriorate.

I bet he lasts longer than Pamela Anderson's fake tits.

 

[Rafterman]

Unfucking believable. It's been 8 damn days since he kicked and it's still wall to wall fucking coverage.

We could nuke the entire middle eastern region and they'd pre-empt any coverage to discuss how long it would take his plastic enhanced corpse to finally deteriorate.

I bet he lasts longer than Pamela Anderson's fake tits.

Can you imagine the toxic waste if he's opted for cremation?

 

[Hellbilly Jim]

Can you imagine the toxic waste if he's opted for cremation?

 

[Dark Pickle]

Unfucking believable. It's been 8 damn days since he kicked and it's still wall to wall fucking coverage.

We could nuke the entire middle eastern region and they'd pre-empt any coverage to discuss how long it would take his plastic enhanced corpse to finally deteriorate.

I bet he lasts longer than Pamela Anderson's fake tits.

You're honestly suprised? We'll never hear the end of this: of that I'm certain.

 

[Iyhara]

Move over Elvis: You're being moonwalked off the stage.

 

[Sarek]

Move over Elvis: You're being moonwalked off the stage.

Never happen.

Though the circumstances are similar and Elvis was a whack job in his own right, Elvis gave more to the music industry than MJ ever did. Hell, if it wasn't for Elvis and his pelvis, guys like MJ would have been tossed off the stage and sent back to the jungle for their crotch grabbing antics a long time ago.

Even MJ has sited Elvis as his inspiration.

 

[Sarek]

I hear Michael Jackson actually died from food poisoning.

He ate some 10 year old nuts!

 

[Sarek]

Michael Jackson hasn’t been this stiff since Macully Culkin spent the night at Neverland Ranch.

 

[Sarek]

Because Jackson’s body was 95% plastic, he will be melted down and turned into legos, this way kids can play with him for a change.

 

[Sarek]

Reports that Michael Jackson has died of a heart attack in his home are untrue… He actually died having a stroke in the children’s ward.

 

[Sarek]

In the spirit of recycling, Michael Jackson will be melted down into plastic party cups so kids can still get their lips around his rim.

 

[Sarek]

In accordance with Michael Jackson’s will, little boys’ pants shall be flown at half-mast today.

 

[Sarek]

I heard Michael Jackson died of food poisoning from eating a 5 year old wiener.

 

[Sarek]

Micheal jackson will always be with us… he is not biodegradable.

 

[Sarek]

Farrah Fawcett arrived at the Pearly Gates and God asked her what he could do for her having led such an honest life. Farrah asked God to simply make sure the children of the world were safe. Five minutes later, Michael Jackson died.

 

[Sarek]

MJ’s dying wish was to be melted down and turned into straws so he can still get sucked on by kids.

 

[Sarek]

It has been released that MJs last wish was that he wants to be melted down and made into a slide so kids can go down on him forever.