LOL - okay, true story time. One of my sister's kids was having some serious behaviour problems and decided she wanted to come live with me because I am oh so very cool while her mom was such a bitch. So, I was at their house observing the situation. Kid put on one of her mom's nightgowns and sat around the living room mouthing off at her mother. Her mom told her to put up her gown, then put on her own pajamas and go to bed. Kid would not obey. Instead, kid argued with her mom and begged to come live with me. I told her that would be fine. However, I'm much different than her mom. I wouldn't ask her twice or argue with her. I'd tell her once to take my gown off and put it up. If she did not do it immediately, I'd rip that gown off of her and throw her butt outside naked. She was also having a problem sneaking out of the house and staying at other people's houses overnight or longer without permission. I told her that, too, would stop immediately. If she snuck out of the house, I would have her tracked down and then she'd spend her nights chained to the toilet. If she disappeared, I'd have her hunted down by the biggest, ugliest, scariest guys I know. The only time she wouldn't be chained to the toilet is when she went to school. The chain would be long enough for her to sleep in her bed, come to the dining table, and clean baseboards with a toothbrush in various places throughout the house. I further explained to her that I believe on making the punishment fit the crime most of the time so she might want to be real careful about what she chose to do to misbehave. She made the mistake of thinking I was kidding with her. By the end of the first week she decided that she had the sweetest most wonderful mom on the planet and could she please go back home to the mother she adored with all of her heart. I kept her a month. Now she is grown. She works for the Police Department and I am the godmother of her children. I am a very nice and generous person except when I am not.
