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SPAMCAPITAL VII: Conchaga is a douchebag!!

ships didn't pass in the night
 
they collided
 
and people were shouting avast, ahoy, astern, port this ...
 
and all that nautical stuff
 
then both ships sank
 
there was no saving the doorknobs
 
or the pantry doors
 
the interior of the captain's quarters.
 
All the men got out though.
 
There were no women or children on board.
 
Which explained the two guys that barely got off their ships in time because they had to get their inflatables from under their beds.
 
Couldn't let the plastic of their dreams sink to the depths where they'd be left to darkness and fish poo.
 
That's why I left instructions not to be buried at sea.
 
I do not wish to be fish food.
 
Besides, I am a fish eater.
 
Can you imagine what they would do to my corpse before they ate me?
 
Corpse crunchers.
 
Oh well.
 
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