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Wacky Reviews: Star Trek
- Thread starter CaptainWacky
- Start date
CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
I'm not reviewing anymore Star Trek until Tomtrek reviews The Force Awakens by the way.
CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
Star Trek: The Motion Picture - I linked to this article earlier in the thread. It's a fascinating look at the first attempt to get a Star Trek movie made. I'm sure there's articles about the making of TMP too and maybe I'll find one later and edit in another link! http://www.denofgeek.com/movies/sta...the-titans-the-star-trek-movie-that-never-was
It's 1979. No Star Trek for ten years (I imagine everyone just forgo about TAS as soon as it ended.) Star Wars is two years old and now we're finally getting the big budget Star Trek movie we all wanted! It would have been pretty cool seeing this for the first time after waiting that long. It begins with a pretty beautiful shot of (what we soon find out is) a Klingon warship. Even though the Klingons have forehead ridges now and speak their own cool language, they still kind of feel like the Klingons from the original series? Like I think I would have recognised that these are an updated version of Klingons and that they actually looked like this all along and the original series just couldn't afford to show them properly. Their ship is deleted by a mysterious space cloud and it's a pretty cool opening scene!
Then we get Spock with long hair on Vulcan undergoing some crazy ritual. Then we see Starfleet Headquarters in San Fransisco for the first time. So many locations in the first ten minutes! Kirk meets with a Vulcan named Sonak who is the new Enterprise science officer. There's some really impressive model work showing shuttles and space stations. It totally blows away any model stuff from the original series, as it should. We see that Scotty has a moustache now and is a bit fatter. Kirk has been head of Starfleet operations for two and a half years but he's been given the Enterprise back now. They fly over to the Enterprise. After about two minutes we see the Enterprise from the front and it's a great moment and the Enterprise looks great. I imagine Trekkies had tears in their eyes seeing this for the first time in 1979. Kirk and Scotty don't speak much at all during this, they just smile at the Enterprise. It's the first part of the movie where people are going to say "this is taking too long." It's still working for me so far though; it's really an impressive piece of cinema with the model work and Jerry Goldsmith's amazing music. But yeah it does last literally five minutes so I can understand people thinking "maybe it would have been just as good at two and a half minutes."
Sulu, Chekov and Uhura are there and they're all cool! We see the Engineering room and it's nothing like the one in the original series. There's a warp core like the one we'll see in every other Star Trek after this. Admiral Kirk tells the Enterprise's new Captain Decker that Kirk is in command for this mission. Decker isn't happy and thinks Kirk is jealous of him and screwed him out of command.
Janice Rand is a transporter chief now(!?) and she manages to kill Sonak and another officer in a horrific scene. Good job, Rand! Those screams. It's hurt a bit by a wooden reaction from Shatner and Grace Lee Whitney. It also feels like a completely needless scene?
Kirk calls a briefing where he shows the crew the Klingon ship being deleted. It's cool how they can actually show hundreds of crewmembers in the one room. In the original series we never saw this many Enterprise crewmembers together because of the limitations of a tv budget (by the third season we barely saw anyone but the main characters.) There's even some alien officers. A Starfleet space station was destroyed too and it's all very sad.
The ship's navigator Ilia arrives. She's bald, she's hot, she's a Deltan...and her oath of celibacy is on record. What the fuck. There's no explanation at all for why she said that. I know Gene didn't get a writing credit on this movie but I'm 100% convinced he put that in.
McCoy finally arrives too (he doesn't want to use the transporter...which is pretty reasonable) and brings some much needed personality to the movie. Because so far, while it's been enjoyable, it's been very sterile. There's been literally no humour. It's only when DeForest Kelley appears with his crazy beard that you remember how much fun Star Trek used to be! Sadly he shaves the beard right away.
Sulu takes the ship out and Kirks says they must risk going to warp inside the star system to meet the cloud. Everyone tells him they need to do more simulations but Kirk orders them to go to warp. They end up in a wormhole (which doesn't look as good as the other effects) and everything starts moving slowly because that's what wormholesdo apparently. Kirk wants to use phases on an asteroid in the wormhole (why is there an asteroid in a wormhole...oh, who cares) but Decker orders Chekov to use torpedos instead. Decker explains that the phasers wouldn't work because of the new design and he's sorry if he's embarrassed Kirk. Kirk is still pissed at him even though clearly Decker was right. Decker is concerned that Kirk is endangering the mission.
Decker and Ilia have a moment. It's not terribly interesting.
Another shuttle catches up with the Entrprise. It has a warp sled (is that what you call it) which is pretty cool. It's Spock! Nearly an hour into the movie (after one brief appearance earlier) he's finally here. He even gets Shatner to show emotion! Uhura and Chekov are excited to see him too and it's a nice moment. But Spock doesn't give a fuck! He fixes and improves the engines because he's fucking Spock! Kirk winks. It's starting to feel a bit more like Star Trek! Kirk, Spock and McCoy have a scene where we find out the ritual Spock was undergoing was supposed to purge all his emotions. He sensed an alien intelligence and had to come investigate.
The Enterprise reaches the cloud. Spock sense an object in the centre of the cloud. It fires on them and Chekov burns his little arm. The Enterprise sends friendship messages and the cloud is fine with them now? The Enterprise starts to fly into the cloud. There's lots of close-ups of all the crew staring at the trippy effects outside. We watch all this on the viewscreen rather than seeing the Enterprise actually fly through the cloud, which feels a bit cheap? McCoy walks onto the Bridge and walks off again, just to give him something to do.
We do get some shots of the Enterprise flying through after that and it is impressive. The cloud is really big and alien looking. I'm not saying it's not a good looking sequence, but it just keeps going and starts to get repetitive. We're not really learning anything new after a certain point. We already know it's big and alien looking.
The cloud probes them with a crazy light and makes Ilia disappear. McCoy walks off the Bridge again because that's what he does now. They fly about some more and the cloud closes its bumhole to lock them in. Ilia appears in a shower. Except she's a probe now and she's showing lots of leg. We finally learn that the alien is named V'Ger. There's a security guy in a helmet? V'Ger wants to join with the creator. The Ilia Probe smashes through a door in a funny bit (I assume it's meant to be funny.) Kirk has Decker follow the robot version of his dead lover around.
Decker tries to get the Ilia Probe to remember being Ilia. She starts remembering things and McCoy has to remind Decker not to try to shag her.
Spock nerve pinches a guy (yes!) and sneaks out of the ship in a spacesuit (a "thrustersuit" actually.) He thrusts through V'Ger's orifice as it opens and enters its interior. It's the most exciting moment so far and pretty sexy. He sees lots of images inside that help him understand what's going on. He tries to mind meld with V'Ger and it hurts him.
Kirk rescues him and takes him to Sickbay. Spock starts laughing(!) V'ger is from a super advanced machine planet and knows all the secrets of the universe but doesn't understand emotion. Kirk and McCoy are both fascinated. It's a good scene, one of the best in the movie.
V'Ger arrives at Earth and disables all planetary defence systems. It wants to remove the "infestation" of carbon units from Earth. It seems a bit random, really. Spock explains that V'Ger is a child. Kirk tells Ilia/V'Ger that it knows the reason why V'Ger can't find the creator but he won't tell. V'Ger lets the Enterprise come to its heart and Kirk, Spock, McCoy, Decker and Ilia finally meet the real V'Ger. It's the Voyager 6 NASA probe and it only thought its name was "V'Ger" because there was dirty on the name plate. Wait...what? The alien race was advanced enough to understand English and be able to send V'Ger back to Earth but not to clean dirt off the name plate? Voyager 6's databanks didn't including its real name? The aliens couldn't have just told V'Ger where it came from (if they can understand English and be able to send it to Earth, surely they'd know that.) It's pretty silly! But kind of charming, in a Star Trek way. The aliens built a machine around Voyager 6 so it could fulfil its mission of learning everything there is to learn. The creator isn't answering because it's using such an old signal. No one mentions that this is all very similar to the episode 'The Changeling'.
Anyway, remember how V'Ger wanted the creator to join with it? Kirk and freinds work out that V'ger needs the capacity to leap beyond logic by physically joining with a human. I'm not sure if that was the reason V'Ger wanted to join with the creator though. Decker merges with V'Ger (after Kirk makes a real half assed attempt to stop him) and a weird spacey thing happens and V'Ger disappears. A new lifeform has been born! Somehow! It's a bit like the ending of 2001: A Space Odyssey but not as good.
Everyone is pretty happy despite Decker just sacrificing himself and Kirk says "out there. Thattaway." The end.
The human adventure is just beginning.
I made the mistake of looking at the comments under a review of this movie before watching it. Some liked it, some didn't, obviously. But the thing that annoyed me was that (some of) the people who liked it were acitng like anyone who didn't like it was an idiot. "This is an ingelligent science fiction movie for intelligent people! YOU JUST WANTED EXPLOSIONS AND ACTION! GO WATCH FAST AND FURIOUS INSTEAD." As if the only two options for a movie are to be slow and ponderous or be Fast and Furious. Another thing I've seen said is that this is the Star Trek movie that's closest to the original series, because it's the most serious and intelligent (they say.) To those people I say, have you watched the original series? It wasn't like this movie! It was fun and wacky! It had loads of humour and crazy funny plots! The thing people remember most fondly about the original series is the Kirk/Spock/McCoy relationship, not serious science fiction. I resent people acting like anyone who doesn't worship this movie as the definitive Star Trek isn't a real fan. I am a real fan. So those types of comments annoyed me!
Having said that, I did enjoy watching it a bit more than I thought I would! It's a big movie. It's ambitious. And it's important to place it in its proper time and context: no Star Trek for ten years then a big budget movie with a beautiful depiction of the Enterprise and space. The model work really holds up well even nearly forty years later. V'Ger feels huge and alien in a way no other Trek movie has really pulled off. The music is great. There are big ideas about the nature of life and the search for meaning which, granted, aren't explored as well as they could have been but at least they're included. The lack of explosions and action isn't a problem (in fact the wormhole scene seems to be injected to add some action and I could have really done without it.) But there are massive problems...
It's not more explosions and action the movie needs, it's more plot and characterisation. While the first half hour is really gripping, it was after that point where I started to think "wait, is this going to be the pace for the whole movie?" I don't think the pace was so slow because it was a super intelligent movie, I think it was because it has a thin plot that needed stretched out. There's long sections (cloud fly through I'm looking at you) where nothing much happens to advance the plot at all. It's a better version of the story from 'The Changeling', yes, but it's a shame they didn't have an original story to go with the stunning effects work.
In terms of characters it's a mixed bag. Spock is the best served of them all: he gets a proper story arc with V'ger's lacking of understanding of emotion mirroring his abandoned attempt to purge all emotions. But Kirk? It's not a good movie for Kirk and that's kind of hard to forgive! He seems like a bit of an asshole for the first half. There's the start of a story with him and Decker where Kirk is jealous of the younger officer and possibly endangering the crew, but there's no resolution to it at all. It's just dropped once they arrive at V'Ger and Decker conveniently dies at the end so they don't have to deal with it again and Kirk can be Captain unchallenged. Shatner doesn't give a particuarly strong performance either. He doesn't even get to make a speech.
I don't care about Decker much. Stephen Collins is pretty wooden (and, you know, a paedophile) so I just kind of shrugged when he died. Ilia doesn't do much before being replaced by the probe, but Persis Khamabatta does a good job after that. Plus she looks quite stunning and alien.
McCoy doesn't do much except walk onto the Bridge and off again (seriously, watch out for him doing that) and Scotty, Uhura, Chekov and Sulu get nothing. But they never got much to do in the original series either so that's not necessarily a complaint.
There's also the completely pointless introduction then death of Sonak. Why did they bother?
So yeah, it's not a disaster. It's a huge achievement in a lot of ways. There's some very memorable visuals and even some great Star Trek moments. But it's lacking a lot of the stuff that made Star Trek so great. It drags at times. I don't know. It's not bad. It's hard to hate something that so much effort went into. I just wish it had been better written ultimately!
SCORE: 7/10
It's 1979. No Star Trek for ten years (I imagine everyone just forgo about TAS as soon as it ended.) Star Wars is two years old and now we're finally getting the big budget Star Trek movie we all wanted! It would have been pretty cool seeing this for the first time after waiting that long. It begins with a pretty beautiful shot of (what we soon find out is) a Klingon warship. Even though the Klingons have forehead ridges now and speak their own cool language, they still kind of feel like the Klingons from the original series? Like I think I would have recognised that these are an updated version of Klingons and that they actually looked like this all along and the original series just couldn't afford to show them properly. Their ship is deleted by a mysterious space cloud and it's a pretty cool opening scene!
Then we get Spock with long hair on Vulcan undergoing some crazy ritual. Then we see Starfleet Headquarters in San Fransisco for the first time. So many locations in the first ten minutes! Kirk meets with a Vulcan named Sonak who is the new Enterprise science officer. There's some really impressive model work showing shuttles and space stations. It totally blows away any model stuff from the original series, as it should. We see that Scotty has a moustache now and is a bit fatter. Kirk has been head of Starfleet operations for two and a half years but he's been given the Enterprise back now. They fly over to the Enterprise. After about two minutes we see the Enterprise from the front and it's a great moment and the Enterprise looks great. I imagine Trekkies had tears in their eyes seeing this for the first time in 1979. Kirk and Scotty don't speak much at all during this, they just smile at the Enterprise. It's the first part of the movie where people are going to say "this is taking too long." It's still working for me so far though; it's really an impressive piece of cinema with the model work and Jerry Goldsmith's amazing music. But yeah it does last literally five minutes so I can understand people thinking "maybe it would have been just as good at two and a half minutes."
Sulu, Chekov and Uhura are there and they're all cool! We see the Engineering room and it's nothing like the one in the original series. There's a warp core like the one we'll see in every other Star Trek after this. Admiral Kirk tells the Enterprise's new Captain Decker that Kirk is in command for this mission. Decker isn't happy and thinks Kirk is jealous of him and screwed him out of command.
Janice Rand is a transporter chief now(!?) and she manages to kill Sonak and another officer in a horrific scene. Good job, Rand! Those screams. It's hurt a bit by a wooden reaction from Shatner and Grace Lee Whitney. It also feels like a completely needless scene?
Kirk calls a briefing where he shows the crew the Klingon ship being deleted. It's cool how they can actually show hundreds of crewmembers in the one room. In the original series we never saw this many Enterprise crewmembers together because of the limitations of a tv budget (by the third season we barely saw anyone but the main characters.) There's even some alien officers. A Starfleet space station was destroyed too and it's all very sad.
The ship's navigator Ilia arrives. She's bald, she's hot, she's a Deltan...and her oath of celibacy is on record. What the fuck. There's no explanation at all for why she said that. I know Gene didn't get a writing credit on this movie but I'm 100% convinced he put that in.
McCoy finally arrives too (he doesn't want to use the transporter...which is pretty reasonable) and brings some much needed personality to the movie. Because so far, while it's been enjoyable, it's been very sterile. There's been literally no humour. It's only when DeForest Kelley appears with his crazy beard that you remember how much fun Star Trek used to be! Sadly he shaves the beard right away.
Sulu takes the ship out and Kirks says they must risk going to warp inside the star system to meet the cloud. Everyone tells him they need to do more simulations but Kirk orders them to go to warp. They end up in a wormhole (which doesn't look as good as the other effects) and everything starts moving slowly because that's what wormholesdo apparently. Kirk wants to use phases on an asteroid in the wormhole (why is there an asteroid in a wormhole...oh, who cares) but Decker orders Chekov to use torpedos instead. Decker explains that the phasers wouldn't work because of the new design and he's sorry if he's embarrassed Kirk. Kirk is still pissed at him even though clearly Decker was right. Decker is concerned that Kirk is endangering the mission.
Decker and Ilia have a moment. It's not terribly interesting.
Another shuttle catches up with the Entrprise. It has a warp sled (is that what you call it) which is pretty cool. It's Spock! Nearly an hour into the movie (after one brief appearance earlier) he's finally here. He even gets Shatner to show emotion! Uhura and Chekov are excited to see him too and it's a nice moment. But Spock doesn't give a fuck! He fixes and improves the engines because he's fucking Spock! Kirk winks. It's starting to feel a bit more like Star Trek! Kirk, Spock and McCoy have a scene where we find out the ritual Spock was undergoing was supposed to purge all his emotions. He sensed an alien intelligence and had to come investigate.
The Enterprise reaches the cloud. Spock sense an object in the centre of the cloud. It fires on them and Chekov burns his little arm. The Enterprise sends friendship messages and the cloud is fine with them now? The Enterprise starts to fly into the cloud. There's lots of close-ups of all the crew staring at the trippy effects outside. We watch all this on the viewscreen rather than seeing the Enterprise actually fly through the cloud, which feels a bit cheap? McCoy walks onto the Bridge and walks off again, just to give him something to do.
We do get some shots of the Enterprise flying through after that and it is impressive. The cloud is really big and alien looking. I'm not saying it's not a good looking sequence, but it just keeps going and starts to get repetitive. We're not really learning anything new after a certain point. We already know it's big and alien looking.
The cloud probes them with a crazy light and makes Ilia disappear. McCoy walks off the Bridge again because that's what he does now. They fly about some more and the cloud closes its bumhole to lock them in. Ilia appears in a shower. Except she's a probe now and she's showing lots of leg. We finally learn that the alien is named V'Ger. There's a security guy in a helmet? V'Ger wants to join with the creator. The Ilia Probe smashes through a door in a funny bit (I assume it's meant to be funny.) Kirk has Decker follow the robot version of his dead lover around.
Decker tries to get the Ilia Probe to remember being Ilia. She starts remembering things and McCoy has to remind Decker not to try to shag her.
Spock nerve pinches a guy (yes!) and sneaks out of the ship in a spacesuit (a "thrustersuit" actually.) He thrusts through V'Ger's orifice as it opens and enters its interior. It's the most exciting moment so far and pretty sexy. He sees lots of images inside that help him understand what's going on. He tries to mind meld with V'Ger and it hurts him.
Kirk rescues him and takes him to Sickbay. Spock starts laughing(!) V'ger is from a super advanced machine planet and knows all the secrets of the universe but doesn't understand emotion. Kirk and McCoy are both fascinated. It's a good scene, one of the best in the movie.
V'Ger arrives at Earth and disables all planetary defence systems. It wants to remove the "infestation" of carbon units from Earth. It seems a bit random, really. Spock explains that V'Ger is a child. Kirk tells Ilia/V'Ger that it knows the reason why V'Ger can't find the creator but he won't tell. V'Ger lets the Enterprise come to its heart and Kirk, Spock, McCoy, Decker and Ilia finally meet the real V'Ger. It's the Voyager 6 NASA probe and it only thought its name was "V'Ger" because there was dirty on the name plate. Wait...what? The alien race was advanced enough to understand English and be able to send V'Ger back to Earth but not to clean dirt off the name plate? Voyager 6's databanks didn't including its real name? The aliens couldn't have just told V'Ger where it came from (if they can understand English and be able to send it to Earth, surely they'd know that.) It's pretty silly! But kind of charming, in a Star Trek way. The aliens built a machine around Voyager 6 so it could fulfil its mission of learning everything there is to learn. The creator isn't answering because it's using such an old signal. No one mentions that this is all very similar to the episode 'The Changeling'.
Anyway, remember how V'Ger wanted the creator to join with it? Kirk and freinds work out that V'ger needs the capacity to leap beyond logic by physically joining with a human. I'm not sure if that was the reason V'Ger wanted to join with the creator though. Decker merges with V'Ger (after Kirk makes a real half assed attempt to stop him) and a weird spacey thing happens and V'Ger disappears. A new lifeform has been born! Somehow! It's a bit like the ending of 2001: A Space Odyssey but not as good.
Everyone is pretty happy despite Decker just sacrificing himself and Kirk says "out there. Thattaway." The end.
The human adventure is just beginning.
I made the mistake of looking at the comments under a review of this movie before watching it. Some liked it, some didn't, obviously. But the thing that annoyed me was that (some of) the people who liked it were acitng like anyone who didn't like it was an idiot. "This is an ingelligent science fiction movie for intelligent people! YOU JUST WANTED EXPLOSIONS AND ACTION! GO WATCH FAST AND FURIOUS INSTEAD." As if the only two options for a movie are to be slow and ponderous or be Fast and Furious. Another thing I've seen said is that this is the Star Trek movie that's closest to the original series, because it's the most serious and intelligent (they say.) To those people I say, have you watched the original series? It wasn't like this movie! It was fun and wacky! It had loads of humour and crazy funny plots! The thing people remember most fondly about the original series is the Kirk/Spock/McCoy relationship, not serious science fiction. I resent people acting like anyone who doesn't worship this movie as the definitive Star Trek isn't a real fan. I am a real fan. So those types of comments annoyed me!
Having said that, I did enjoy watching it a bit more than I thought I would! It's a big movie. It's ambitious. And it's important to place it in its proper time and context: no Star Trek for ten years then a big budget movie with a beautiful depiction of the Enterprise and space. The model work really holds up well even nearly forty years later. V'Ger feels huge and alien in a way no other Trek movie has really pulled off. The music is great. There are big ideas about the nature of life and the search for meaning which, granted, aren't explored as well as they could have been but at least they're included. The lack of explosions and action isn't a problem (in fact the wormhole scene seems to be injected to add some action and I could have really done without it.) But there are massive problems...
It's not more explosions and action the movie needs, it's more plot and characterisation. While the first half hour is really gripping, it was after that point where I started to think "wait, is this going to be the pace for the whole movie?" I don't think the pace was so slow because it was a super intelligent movie, I think it was because it has a thin plot that needed stretched out. There's long sections (cloud fly through I'm looking at you) where nothing much happens to advance the plot at all. It's a better version of the story from 'The Changeling', yes, but it's a shame they didn't have an original story to go with the stunning effects work.
In terms of characters it's a mixed bag. Spock is the best served of them all: he gets a proper story arc with V'ger's lacking of understanding of emotion mirroring his abandoned attempt to purge all emotions. But Kirk? It's not a good movie for Kirk and that's kind of hard to forgive! He seems like a bit of an asshole for the first half. There's the start of a story with him and Decker where Kirk is jealous of the younger officer and possibly endangering the crew, but there's no resolution to it at all. It's just dropped once they arrive at V'Ger and Decker conveniently dies at the end so they don't have to deal with it again and Kirk can be Captain unchallenged. Shatner doesn't give a particuarly strong performance either. He doesn't even get to make a speech.
I don't care about Decker much. Stephen Collins is pretty wooden (and, you know, a paedophile) so I just kind of shrugged when he died. Ilia doesn't do much before being replaced by the probe, but Persis Khamabatta does a good job after that. Plus she looks quite stunning and alien.
McCoy doesn't do much except walk onto the Bridge and off again (seriously, watch out for him doing that) and Scotty, Uhura, Chekov and Sulu get nothing. But they never got much to do in the original series either so that's not necessarily a complaint.
There's also the completely pointless introduction then death of Sonak. Why did they bother?
So yeah, it's not a disaster. It's a huge achievement in a lot of ways. There's some very memorable visuals and even some great Star Trek moments. But it's lacking a lot of the stuff that made Star Trek so great. It drags at times. I don't know. It's not bad. It's hard to hate something that so much effort went into. I just wish it had been better written ultimately!
SCORE: 7/10
The Tomtrek
Love Wookiee
I have this weird soft spot for Star Trek: The Motion Picture. There are several moments in that film where the plot stands up and goes "Uh, hey guys, I'm just going to pop out for a bit so, uh, just stay here and look at some effects and listen to some music and I'll be back in, like, 5 minutes...".
And I should hate that, except the effects are AMAZING and the music is (in my opinion) some of the best music that has ever been written for film.
It tries to go for big ideas and it never really gets there, but I liked that it tried. I like that in a post-Star Wars world (and this film only exists because Star Wars was so big and the studios wanted anything sci-fi to cash in on that) it instead tries to do 2001: A Space Odyssey instead of Star Wars but Star Trek (UNLIKE SOME OTHER RECENT STAR TREK FILMS I COULD NAME).
You're right that this is a really good story for Spock, though - in a way it's one of the most important parts of his character development. His mind meld with V'Ger is what finally allows him to find the balance between his human and vulcan halves, bringing us from the sometimes quite emotional character we saw in TOS to the more calm and balanced Spock we see throughout the rest of the films.
The costumes are terrible and it's 70's as fuck but only in the same way that TOS was 60's as fuck.
Ages ago - ALMOST SEVEN FUCKING YEARS HOLY FUCK WE'RE ALL SO OLD - I made a thread about the novelisation to TMP, which was written by Gene "waves and waves and waves of cum" Roddenberry himself and is SO FUCKING HORNY because of it.
The "oath of celibacy" thing is explained that Deltans LOVE TO FUCK but when a human fucks a Deltan they go insane with love so Deltans aren't allowed to have sex in Starfleet.
Like, this is what Gene Roddenberry, great bird of the galaxy, created of Star Trek, wrote for the scene where the robot Ilia appears in the sonic shower:
Seriously if you can find a copy of the TMP novelisation it's really worth a read because there are parts of it that are just softcore Star Trek Erotic written by Gene himself. It's odd when Rick Berman was trying to preserve "Gene's vision" after he died, none of it involved crazy alien sex people WHO LOVE TO FUCK and Starfleet Captains staring at boobs.
And I should hate that, except the effects are AMAZING and the music is (in my opinion) some of the best music that has ever been written for film.
It tries to go for big ideas and it never really gets there, but I liked that it tried. I like that in a post-Star Wars world (and this film only exists because Star Wars was so big and the studios wanted anything sci-fi to cash in on that) it instead tries to do 2001: A Space Odyssey instead of Star Wars but Star Trek (UNLIKE SOME OTHER RECENT STAR TREK FILMS I COULD NAME).
You're right that this is a really good story for Spock, though - in a way it's one of the most important parts of his character development. His mind meld with V'Ger is what finally allows him to find the balance between his human and vulcan halves, bringing us from the sometimes quite emotional character we saw in TOS to the more calm and balanced Spock we see throughout the rest of the films.
The costumes are terrible and it's 70's as fuck but only in the same way that TOS was 60's as fuck.
Ages ago - ALMOST SEVEN FUCKING YEARS HOLY FUCK WE'RE ALL SO OLD - I made a thread about the novelisation to TMP, which was written by Gene "waves and waves and waves of cum" Roddenberry himself and is SO FUCKING HORNY because of it.
The "oath of celibacy" thing is explained that Deltans LOVE TO FUCK but when a human fucks a Deltan they go insane with love so Deltans aren't allowed to have sex in Starfleet.
Like, this is what Gene Roddenberry, great bird of the galaxy, created of Star Trek, wrote for the scene where the robot Ilia appears in the sonic shower:
Seriously if you can find a copy of the TMP novelisation it's really worth a read because there are parts of it that are just softcore Star Trek Erotic written by Gene himself. It's odd when Rick Berman was trying to preserve "Gene's vision" after he died, none of it involved crazy alien sex people WHO LOVE TO FUCK and Starfleet Captains staring at boobs.
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CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
Star Trek 2: The Wrath of Khan - It's 1982. Gene Roddenberry's been booted of fhis own creation after being blamed for the creative failures and huge ballooning budget of The Motion Picture. HIs replacement is producer Harve Bennet, who hired Nicolas Meyer to direct this sequel (he also did an uncredited full rewrite.) With rumours that Spock is going to die, there's a chance fans could completely reject this even more than they did The Motion Picture. So it needs to be good!
We start with a young Vulcan female in command of the Enterprise(!?) with Spock, McCoy, Sulu and Uhura all on the Bridge. The Enterprise enters the Klingon Neutral Zone to save a ship, but is attacked by Klingons. Sulu, McCoy and Spock(!) all died. Well, no. Kirk comes walking on the Bridge and it's just a simulator. Spock isn't dead, those rumours were obviously about this scene and Spock will never die for real! Admiral Kirk tells Saavik about no win scenarios and lays down some of the themes of the film (how we deal with death is important and he's getting old!)
It's Kirk's birthday and he's not happy about it. Spock gives him A Tale Of Two Cities and McCoy gives him Romulan Ale and reading glasses. The scene between Kirk and McCoy alone has more characterisation for Kirk than all of The Motion Picture did.
Chekov is first officer on a ship named The Reliant now (the first Federation starship we've seen that doesn't look like the Enterprise.) They're working with some scientists on something named Genesis. Chekov and the Reliant's Captain Terrell beam down to planet Ceti Alpha VI and find a pod with a copy of MOBY DICK inside. Chekov starts to panic. They're taken prisoner by a bunch of people and their leader, a guy with some awesome gloves. It's Khan! Ricardo Montalban was one of the most memorable villains of the original series and he's back and his voice is still awesome. Chekov explains his backstory (and let's not even go into the whole "but Khan never met Chekov!" thing because who cares really.) Khan explains that he wants revenge on Kirk for stranding him on this lifeless planet (Ceti Alpha VI blew up and fucked up Ceti Alpha V) and Montalban is just glorious chewing every word out. He picks up Chekov with one hand and it's pretty awesome! He inserts mind-fucking eels into Chekov and Terrell's ears in a pretty horrific moment.
Sulu flies Kirk, Uhura and McCoy to the Enterprise in a shuttle. It's much shorter than the scene of Kirk being flown to the Enterprise in the previous movie! Kirk says something about having Sulu for "three weeks" but it's not explained where Sulu is going in three weeks. Did Shatner really mess the scene up on purpose because he didn't want Sulu to become a Captain? That's what George Takei said. I don't know what happened, but it was worth mentioning.
Everyone's happy to be back on the Enterprise. Spock lets Saavik fly the Enterprise out of spacedock.
Mindfucked Chekov tells Carol Marcus (the chief scientist) that he's coming to take her Genesis Device and blames Admiral Kirk. Carol's son seems to dislike Kirk!
She contacts Kirk and tells him what's going on with Genesis. He doesn't know what she's talking about. The Enterprise is the "only ship in the quadrant" as usual. Kirk wants Spock to stay in command but Spock insists Kirk do it. Spock seems realy laid back here after the events TMP. Like McCoy he tells Kirk that he made a mistake by accepting promotion. Also the needs of the many outweight the needs of the few and he they have been and always shall be friends! I wonder if those lines will ironically be repeated later.
Khan has command of the Reliant now and he's showing off his chest. I would too if I had that chest! His friend telsl him he doesn't need to go after Kirk but Khan is still full of wrath.
Kirk reveals Project Genesis to Spock and McCoy. Genesis is a device that can terraform a dead planet into one that can sustain life. It seems pretty cool! We get a great classic Spock/McCoy clash as they talk about Genesis. Spock thinks it's great but McCoy instantly points out the way it could be misused.
The Reliant shows up acting weird. Saavik starts to point out a general order but Spock tells her Kirk is well aware. Motalban is just having the time of his life talking about a certain old Klingon proverb! The Enterprise raises its shields too late and the Reliant fires on them. Khan reveals himself to Kirk and even though Montalban and Shatner aren't in the same room (and never will be in the whole movie) they're great bouncing off each other. Khan wants Genesis but Kirk manages one of his brilliant Kirk moves by lowering Reliant's shields remotely and shooting the shit out of them.
Scotty shows up on the Bridge with a horribly burned Cadet, who then dies in Sickbay. Probably should have gone to Sickbay first? (I know he's supposed to be Scotty's nephew but that isn't mentioned at all in the version I'm watching.)
The Enterprise arrives at Regula 1 where Carol and David Marcus are and Kirk, McCoy and Saavik beam down. They find most of the crew dead and Chekov and Terrell stuffed in a box. They find the Genesis Device at last and are attacked by David Marcus. Turns out Terrell and Chekov are still under Khan's control! Khan has Genesis. Terrell kills himself rather than kill Kirk as Khan orders (great pained performance by Paul Winfield) and Kirk and Khan trade some all time classic dialogue (I really love "Khan, you bloodsucker!") Kirk tries to bait Khan down to the planetoid but Khan says he's done far worse by leaving Kirk buried alive on a dead planet. This happens.
(Of course we soon find out that Kirk and Spock were speaking in code, so the situation wasn't as dire as it first appeared. Was Kirk exaggerating his "KHAN!" to fool Khan? Or was it just a genuine reaction to the fact that Khan had killed many people and was going to kill more? Probably both?)
We find out that David is Kirk's son. That just makes him feel even older! We see the Genesis Cave and it's quite beautiful. Even McCoy likes it. Kirk tells Saavik he cheated on the Kobayashi Maru test. She points out he's never faced death but he doesn't believe in no win scenarios. Spock lied about how long it would take to fix the Enterprise and now it's time for the big fight!
Kirk takes the Enterprise to the Mutara Nebula where the odds will be even. Kirk laughs at Khan's superior intellect! Khan can't resist fighting because he didn't understand the message of Moby Dick. Even though this is the big action setpiece of the movie it plays out like a battle of wits between two great commanders rather than just an excuse to blow things up. That's what makes it good! Khan isn't used to thinking three dimensionally and Kirk uses that to best him. But Khan still wants his revenge and won't surrender, activating the Genesis Device instead. The Enterprise can't escape fast enough due to damage to the engines and there's a radiation leak. What's going to happen...
Spock has actually been pretty lowkey in the movie so far. He's been good when he's been there, but we've kind of took him for granted. He nerve pinches McCoy (and mysteriously tells him "REMEMBER") and enters the radiation filled room. Spock fixes the engines and the Enterprise escapes just as Genesis goes off. A new planet is being formed...as Kirk runs down to engineering to find Spock dying. (One crewmember helpfully gives Kirk a blowjob while he's held back to calm him down.) I've probably watched this scene more times than any other scene in Star Trek. It still works. Spock repeats his lines from earlier about the needs of the many, just as I predicted!
As if that isn't sad enough, the funeral is possibly even more tear-jerking with Shatner's brillian delivery of "his was the most...human." And Scotty playing the bagpipes.
Kirk admits to David that he's finally faced death. David said says he's proud to be Kirk's son. I sure hope we get to see their relationship develop in future movies.
Kirk feels young and Spock's torpedo coffin has touched down on Genesis. Nimoy gets to make the "space, the final frontier" speech THE END.
So, this is a great movie but let's start by comparing it to The Motion Picture. The one area where it isn't as good as TMP is how it looks. I mean, the uniforms look better, but the special effects aren't as good and it doesn't feel as big as the previous movie. Some of the wonder if space travel is gone. But it had an $11 million budget compared to the insane (for the time) $46 million TMP ended up costing so that's to be expect! And consdering the budget it still looks really good.
It's interesting how this movie completely ignores the events of TMP. It works perfectly as a sequel to the original series, set fifteen years later, and you could actually avoid TMP and not miss anything. I'm not saying you should do that, just that you could! There's some weirdness in that it's supposed to be set 12 years after TMP, which really doesn't feel right, but I assume that's becasue of Kirk's "fifteen years" line about Khan and the Okudas working out some timeline and really I stopped caring about things like that years ago. Let's move on!
In terms of character work it blows TMP away. This is the best Kirk's been since season two of TOS back in 1968. Shatner was initially reluctant to play an aged version of Kirk but does a great job (and actually his reluctance probably helped him make Kirk's comments about aging and death feel more real.) Nimoy is so good as Spock that it's only when he does something big (like, you know, dying) that you realise how great he is. Chekov gets an expanded part and while I didn't like Chekov much in the original series he's actually very good here. Kirstie Alley makes a very good Vulcan (and yes she was hot.)
Khan was the perfect choice for the villain. The only other original series character I could see being as good would have been John Colicos as Kor, but he didn't have a reason to be bitter at Kirk. Khan actually has a pretty good case against Kirk here: it was pretty bad of Kirk to just leave all Khan's people and never check for explodng planets or anything. Killing off Marla McGivers means we don't have to deal with their rather problematic relationship and gives Khan another good rason to want revenge. I also enjoy his relationship with Joachim.
Even though it's more action packed than TMP, it's not some dumb action movie. The big space battle doesn't turn into a Star Wars rip-off, it's more inline with original series episodes like 'Balance of Terror' but updated for the big screen. Really the whole Mutara Nebula sequence is a master class in editing, acting, music and effects work (on a budget) that the later movies have never been able to replicate as they just say "LET'S HAVE A BIG SPACE FIGHT LIKE WRATH OF KHAN" without remembering what it was that made that fight so great.
And it still has scinece fiction stuff in it! The Genesis Device is a really cool idea and we get some Trekkian moments of wonder when Kirk first sees the Genesis Cave, and in the birth of the Genesis planet at the end.
It's a movie that's probably remembered first for Spock's death and second for Khan as a villain, but really everything about this movie is pretty great and just works. It manages to be more exciting and accessible than TMP while also being more true to the spirit of the original series and having much better story-telling. It's quite an amazing achievement! At this point it's peak Star Trek.
SCORE: 10/10
We start with a young Vulcan female in command of the Enterprise(!?) with Spock, McCoy, Sulu and Uhura all on the Bridge. The Enterprise enters the Klingon Neutral Zone to save a ship, but is attacked by Klingons. Sulu, McCoy and Spock(!) all died. Well, no. Kirk comes walking on the Bridge and it's just a simulator. Spock isn't dead, those rumours were obviously about this scene and Spock will never die for real! Admiral Kirk tells Saavik about no win scenarios and lays down some of the themes of the film (how we deal with death is important and he's getting old!)
It's Kirk's birthday and he's not happy about it. Spock gives him A Tale Of Two Cities and McCoy gives him Romulan Ale and reading glasses. The scene between Kirk and McCoy alone has more characterisation for Kirk than all of The Motion Picture did.
Chekov is first officer on a ship named The Reliant now (the first Federation starship we've seen that doesn't look like the Enterprise.) They're working with some scientists on something named Genesis. Chekov and the Reliant's Captain Terrell beam down to planet Ceti Alpha VI and find a pod with a copy of MOBY DICK inside. Chekov starts to panic. They're taken prisoner by a bunch of people and their leader, a guy with some awesome gloves. It's Khan! Ricardo Montalban was one of the most memorable villains of the original series and he's back and his voice is still awesome. Chekov explains his backstory (and let's not even go into the whole "but Khan never met Chekov!" thing because who cares really.) Khan explains that he wants revenge on Kirk for stranding him on this lifeless planet (Ceti Alpha VI blew up and fucked up Ceti Alpha V) and Montalban is just glorious chewing every word out. He picks up Chekov with one hand and it's pretty awesome! He inserts mind-fucking eels into Chekov and Terrell's ears in a pretty horrific moment.
Sulu flies Kirk, Uhura and McCoy to the Enterprise in a shuttle. It's much shorter than the scene of Kirk being flown to the Enterprise in the previous movie! Kirk says something about having Sulu for "three weeks" but it's not explained where Sulu is going in three weeks. Did Shatner really mess the scene up on purpose because he didn't want Sulu to become a Captain? That's what George Takei said. I don't know what happened, but it was worth mentioning.
Everyone's happy to be back on the Enterprise. Spock lets Saavik fly the Enterprise out of spacedock.
Mindfucked Chekov tells Carol Marcus (the chief scientist) that he's coming to take her Genesis Device and blames Admiral Kirk. Carol's son seems to dislike Kirk!
She contacts Kirk and tells him what's going on with Genesis. He doesn't know what she's talking about. The Enterprise is the "only ship in the quadrant" as usual. Kirk wants Spock to stay in command but Spock insists Kirk do it. Spock seems realy laid back here after the events TMP. Like McCoy he tells Kirk that he made a mistake by accepting promotion. Also the needs of the many outweight the needs of the few and he they have been and always shall be friends! I wonder if those lines will ironically be repeated later.
Khan has command of the Reliant now and he's showing off his chest. I would too if I had that chest! His friend telsl him he doesn't need to go after Kirk but Khan is still full of wrath.
Kirk reveals Project Genesis to Spock and McCoy. Genesis is a device that can terraform a dead planet into one that can sustain life. It seems pretty cool! We get a great classic Spock/McCoy clash as they talk about Genesis. Spock thinks it's great but McCoy instantly points out the way it could be misused.
The Reliant shows up acting weird. Saavik starts to point out a general order but Spock tells her Kirk is well aware. Motalban is just having the time of his life talking about a certain old Klingon proverb! The Enterprise raises its shields too late and the Reliant fires on them. Khan reveals himself to Kirk and even though Montalban and Shatner aren't in the same room (and never will be in the whole movie) they're great bouncing off each other. Khan wants Genesis but Kirk manages one of his brilliant Kirk moves by lowering Reliant's shields remotely and shooting the shit out of them.
Scotty shows up on the Bridge with a horribly burned Cadet, who then dies in Sickbay. Probably should have gone to Sickbay first? (I know he's supposed to be Scotty's nephew but that isn't mentioned at all in the version I'm watching.)
The Enterprise arrives at Regula 1 where Carol and David Marcus are and Kirk, McCoy and Saavik beam down. They find most of the crew dead and Chekov and Terrell stuffed in a box. They find the Genesis Device at last and are attacked by David Marcus. Turns out Terrell and Chekov are still under Khan's control! Khan has Genesis. Terrell kills himself rather than kill Kirk as Khan orders (great pained performance by Paul Winfield) and Kirk and Khan trade some all time classic dialogue (I really love "Khan, you bloodsucker!") Kirk tries to bait Khan down to the planetoid but Khan says he's done far worse by leaving Kirk buried alive on a dead planet. This happens.
(Of course we soon find out that Kirk and Spock were speaking in code, so the situation wasn't as dire as it first appeared. Was Kirk exaggerating his "KHAN!" to fool Khan? Or was it just a genuine reaction to the fact that Khan had killed many people and was going to kill more? Probably both?)
We find out that David is Kirk's son. That just makes him feel even older! We see the Genesis Cave and it's quite beautiful. Even McCoy likes it. Kirk tells Saavik he cheated on the Kobayashi Maru test. She points out he's never faced death but he doesn't believe in no win scenarios. Spock lied about how long it would take to fix the Enterprise and now it's time for the big fight!
Kirk takes the Enterprise to the Mutara Nebula where the odds will be even. Kirk laughs at Khan's superior intellect! Khan can't resist fighting because he didn't understand the message of Moby Dick. Even though this is the big action setpiece of the movie it plays out like a battle of wits between two great commanders rather than just an excuse to blow things up. That's what makes it good! Khan isn't used to thinking three dimensionally and Kirk uses that to best him. But Khan still wants his revenge and won't surrender, activating the Genesis Device instead. The Enterprise can't escape fast enough due to damage to the engines and there's a radiation leak. What's going to happen...
Spock has actually been pretty lowkey in the movie so far. He's been good when he's been there, but we've kind of took him for granted. He nerve pinches McCoy (and mysteriously tells him "REMEMBER") and enters the radiation filled room. Spock fixes the engines and the Enterprise escapes just as Genesis goes off. A new planet is being formed...as Kirk runs down to engineering to find Spock dying. (One crewmember helpfully gives Kirk a blowjob while he's held back to calm him down.) I've probably watched this scene more times than any other scene in Star Trek. It still works. Spock repeats his lines from earlier about the needs of the many, just as I predicted!
As if that isn't sad enough, the funeral is possibly even more tear-jerking with Shatner's brillian delivery of "his was the most...human." And Scotty playing the bagpipes.
Kirk admits to David that he's finally faced death. David said says he's proud to be Kirk's son. I sure hope we get to see their relationship develop in future movies.
Kirk feels young and Spock's torpedo coffin has touched down on Genesis. Nimoy gets to make the "space, the final frontier" speech THE END.
So, this is a great movie but let's start by comparing it to The Motion Picture. The one area where it isn't as good as TMP is how it looks. I mean, the uniforms look better, but the special effects aren't as good and it doesn't feel as big as the previous movie. Some of the wonder if space travel is gone. But it had an $11 million budget compared to the insane (for the time) $46 million TMP ended up costing so that's to be expect! And consdering the budget it still looks really good.
It's interesting how this movie completely ignores the events of TMP. It works perfectly as a sequel to the original series, set fifteen years later, and you could actually avoid TMP and not miss anything. I'm not saying you should do that, just that you could! There's some weirdness in that it's supposed to be set 12 years after TMP, which really doesn't feel right, but I assume that's becasue of Kirk's "fifteen years" line about Khan and the Okudas working out some timeline and really I stopped caring about things like that years ago. Let's move on!
In terms of character work it blows TMP away. This is the best Kirk's been since season two of TOS back in 1968. Shatner was initially reluctant to play an aged version of Kirk but does a great job (and actually his reluctance probably helped him make Kirk's comments about aging and death feel more real.) Nimoy is so good as Spock that it's only when he does something big (like, you know, dying) that you realise how great he is. Chekov gets an expanded part and while I didn't like Chekov much in the original series he's actually very good here. Kirstie Alley makes a very good Vulcan (and yes she was hot.)
Khan was the perfect choice for the villain. The only other original series character I could see being as good would have been John Colicos as Kor, but he didn't have a reason to be bitter at Kirk. Khan actually has a pretty good case against Kirk here: it was pretty bad of Kirk to just leave all Khan's people and never check for explodng planets or anything. Killing off Marla McGivers means we don't have to deal with their rather problematic relationship and gives Khan another good rason to want revenge. I also enjoy his relationship with Joachim.
Even though it's more action packed than TMP, it's not some dumb action movie. The big space battle doesn't turn into a Star Wars rip-off, it's more inline with original series episodes like 'Balance of Terror' but updated for the big screen. Really the whole Mutara Nebula sequence is a master class in editing, acting, music and effects work (on a budget) that the later movies have never been able to replicate as they just say "LET'S HAVE A BIG SPACE FIGHT LIKE WRATH OF KHAN" without remembering what it was that made that fight so great.
And it still has scinece fiction stuff in it! The Genesis Device is a really cool idea and we get some Trekkian moments of wonder when Kirk first sees the Genesis Cave, and in the birth of the Genesis planet at the end.
It's a movie that's probably remembered first for Spock's death and second for Khan as a villain, but really everything about this movie is pretty great and just works. It manages to be more exciting and accessible than TMP while also being more true to the spirit of the original series and having much better story-telling. It's quite an amazing achievement! At this point it's peak Star Trek.
SCORE: 10/10
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SAUSAGEMAN
Registered User
i've never seen twok
Fuddlemiff
Is this real life?
The first time I watched it I was around 10 so it's difficult to stand back and judge it as a movie, but I reckon it'd be entertaining for anyone who likes Trek, or just a good cat and mouse movie. The sci-fi elements are actually fairly minimal. It certainly doesn't suffer from any of the technobabble that later shows and movies did. It could easily be set at sea without much change. What really makes it is the characterisation and acting. Ricardo Montalban is just so watchable.
CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
It's definitely a great movie in its own right. There isn't a moment wasted; every line serves the story; it's lean and focused. AND HIS PECS WERE REAL.
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Fuddlemiff
Is this real life?
Those pecs confused me so much as a child.
CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
Optimus Prime's big metal abs confused me.
The Tomtrek
Love Wookiee
Wrath of Khan... it's a good film!!
Colonel Kira's Left Tit
Bearded Belly of Bajor
It's not as good as most people say it is, but it is kind of an extension of TOS, so for that I'm grateful.
CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
Star Trek 3: The Search for Spock - It's 1984. Star Wars is finished FOREVER but after the success of TWOK Star Trek gets to live on in movie form. Harve Bennet writes with Leonard Nimoy (the guy who plays Spock!) directing. Nicholas Meyer supposedly didn't return because of being unhappy with the whole "bringing back Spock" thing.
The movie starts with a replay of Spock's death and funeral, and Nimoy reciting the "boldly go" speech. Niomy's name is notably absent from the cast list. It would be funny if they didn't find Spock after all! We do get a special appearance by Dame Judith Anderson (okay?) and introduced to Robin Curtis as Saavik. I hope we get a new Saavik in every film!
The Enterprise is on its way home and Kirk feels sad and lonely after Spock's death. This already feels like a retcon from the end of TWOK where he felt young. Meanwhile there's a Klingon with a dog. He's in a Bird of Prey and it looks cool. We get a lot of Klingon language between him and his wife and it sounds cool. Klingons are still cool. He blows up his wife which isn't cool for her.
The Enterprise arrives at Earth's Spacedock and it's massive. There's another ship there named the Excelsior and Scotty makes fun of it. Grace Lee Whitney is wearing a wig and I have no idea if she's meant to be Rand or not. Let's just ignore her. McCoy is acting crazy (DeForest Kelley does a great crazy face) and talking like Spock. He took the death hard, I guess!
An Admiral with a moustache reveals that the Enterprise is being decommissioned because it's "twenty years old" and I guess he forgot about Christopher Pike. Fuck that Admiral.
David Marcus and New Saavik arrive at Genesis on a science ship. They locate Spock's "tube" and detect lifeforms.
Sarek(!) comes to see Kirk. He's angry at Kirk for leveaing Spock's body on Genesis and talks about Spock's Katra and stuff and Kirk doesn't know what the fuck he's going on about. He mind melds with Kirk and finds no Katra. Kirk eventually works out that it's in McCoy, after watching a tape recording. You'd think McCoy acting weird and talking in Spock's voice would be enough to give it away but apparently not!
Saavik and David find lifeforms that have quickly evolved from microbes. That's not how evolution works.
Admiral Asshole won't let Kirk go to Genesis for some reason and Kirk says "the word is no...so naturally I'm going to do it anyway" which is a good Kirk line. McCoy's in a space bar that seems inspired by Star Wars but is more like Spaceballs. He talks to an alien who speaks in a really annoying backwards way. Like Yoda if Yoda sucked. FEDERATION SECURITY arrest McCoy. This scene doesn't work for me AT ALL.
Kirk asking McCoy "how many fingers am I holding up" while doing a Vulcan salute, on the other hand, does work for me. It's time to steal the Enterprise! A tall security guard calls Sulu "Tiny" and Sulu beats him up. Scotty says "up yer shaft!" to a turbolift. A bad actor is a dick to Uhura. What's with ALL OF STARFLEET being dicks in this movie? She locks him in the closet. The others steal the Enterprise, which can now be operated by five people. Excelsior tries to catch them using its fancy transwarp but Scotty's broken it. It's a fun sequence, the best part of the movie so far, even if it is highly cheesey in places (how did Mr. Adventure ever get through Starfleet Academy?)
Saavik and David find a Vulcan child. It's the reborn Spock, growing up super fast for reasons. The Captain of their ship is an idiot (as apparently everyone in Starfleet who isn't on the Enterprise is) and their ship is destroyed in one shot by the Bird of Prey.
David admits that he used unstable matter in construction of Genesis and basically he's a big unethical cheat. The planet will be dead soon and Spock's about to hit Pon farr. She does some finger touching with young Spock and the it cuts away. This would be pretty weird for Saavik, having sex (I assume they had sex!) with her former teacher, now in a teenage body. But the movie isn't interested in exploring that. The Klingons capture them the next morning.
The Enterprise shoots the Bird of Prety when it decloaks, but the Enterprise's shileds won't go up (Scotty fucked up!) and the Enterprise is disabled. Kirk and Kruge face off. Kirk gets to speak to David briefly. David dies in Saavik's place. Kirk sits down and misses his chair and calls Kruge a "Klingon bastard." It's a surprisingly effective bit of acting from Shatner.
Kirk surrenders the Enterprise to Kruge but sets the Enterprise to self destruct. The saucer blows up, killing the Klingons who beamed over, then the rest of the Enterprise burns up as Kirk watches from Genesis. It's a sad moment, obviously. Seems a bit weird that after everything the Enterprise has been through it would fall to a few Klingons, but that's how it goes!
Spock goes all Incredible Hulk on a Klingon and Kirk gets to mourn at David's body for a moment. He lies about knowing the secret of Genesis to get Kruge to come down to the dyng planet. They have a fight, kind of like the fights Kirk had in the original series except he doesn't lose his shirt this time. Kirk kicks him into lava saying "I...have had...enough...of YOU!" Kirk and Spock are beamed up to the Bird of Prey in time (there's only one Klingon left...more on that LATER.)
McCoy has a nice moment talking to Spock's regrown body. They arrive at Vulcan where Uhura (remmeber her?) and Sarek are waiting. An old Vulcan woman (ti's Dame Judith Anderson! I guess!) performs the rite to return Spock's Katra to his body. I do enjoy this mystical Vulcan stuff. I like the way the speak! It takes a while and eveyrone paces about looking concerned.
Sarek asks Kirk if it was all worth it. Spock comes walking out (isn't it really convenient that he aged back to the exact age he was at time of death?) and doesn't remember anyone at first. Kirk tells him that the needs of the one outweigh the needs of the many. Spock remember that his name is Jim and the original series theme plays and THIS is actually the best part of the movie.
...and the adventure continues...
This is a weird movie. It has a lot of good stuff in it. Whnever I see it on tv I can watch parts of it and enjoy those parts. But is it actually a good movie in its own right? I don't think it is? Like it exists solely to undo the ending of the previous (great) movie in the series. That's a pretty hard thing to overcome. I feel it has plot issues. Really the whole plot is just "fly to Genesis, fly to Vulcan." Everything else is just there to extend it. Everyone in Starfleet acts like a jerk to Kirk for no reason other than so we can have the stealing the Enterprise sequence (which is good fun!) The Klingons are just thugs who get in the way. What's the actual story here? I guess it's Kirk being willing to do anythng to get Spock back and asking if it's worth all the sacrifice. Is it worth it? I love Spock but he chose to give his life to save the crew. Does getting your best friend back make up for losing your son? I don't know. I feel like that all could have been explored more.
And I really don't like that David died. TWOK had a bittersweet ending with Kirk facing his own mortality after losing Spock, but also facing the possibility of having a relationship with the son he'd just discovered. None of that promsie pays off here as David dies after only a brief conversation with Kirk. He hasn't been around long enough for it to be sad, and while Shatner does a great job reacting to his death it all feels a bit cheap. Like they wanted another shocking death after TWOK and David was the easiest option. I also don't like how they reveal that he was a fraud who cheated with the Genesis Device and that the planet blows up a few days after being created. It feels like they're pissing on a lot of the plot developments from TWOK. And what's with Carol Marcus just being completely ereased from the story?
There's some cool new models here for the Klingon Bird of Prey and Starbase, yet the spaceship stuff doens't look as good as it did in TWOK? I think it's the way they shoot space? It doesn't look as spacey. I don't know. It's a thing.
Nimoy does a decent job as director but Nicholas Meyer did a great job as director so it's hard not to compare the two.
HAVING SAID ALL THAT, there's still plenty to like here!
Pretend that says "III" and it's still true! Shatner gives another strong performance here with lots of quotable lines. I praised his reaction to David's death earlier, but has there ever been a better Shatner line reading than this?
DeForest Kelley is fun as a Bones who is sharing Spock's mind. The rest of the crew don't do much (as usual!) but they're all reliably entertaining. Christopher Lloyd actually does a very good job as Kruge, better than I remembered. The problem is that Kruge lacks an complexity. It's a good bad guy performance, but there's nothing more to the character. And of course any villain is going to suffer compared to Khan. Robin Curtis is not as good a Saavik as Kirstie Alley. She's not terrible but it just adds to the general feeling of the movie being worse than TWOK in every way.
So yeah, it's a movie with lots of good stuff that lacks its own identity. I'm not saying I'm totally against Spock coming back, but having to make a whole movie just to undo the biggest thing that happened in the previous movie is always going to resort in slightly substandard story. I'd probably even say TMP worked better as a movie in its own right than this did.
SCORE: 6.5/10
The movie starts with a replay of Spock's death and funeral, and Nimoy reciting the "boldly go" speech. Niomy's name is notably absent from the cast list. It would be funny if they didn't find Spock after all! We do get a special appearance by Dame Judith Anderson (okay?) and introduced to Robin Curtis as Saavik. I hope we get a new Saavik in every film!
The Enterprise is on its way home and Kirk feels sad and lonely after Spock's death. This already feels like a retcon from the end of TWOK where he felt young. Meanwhile there's a Klingon with a dog. He's in a Bird of Prey and it looks cool. We get a lot of Klingon language between him and his wife and it sounds cool. Klingons are still cool. He blows up his wife which isn't cool for her.
The Enterprise arrives at Earth's Spacedock and it's massive. There's another ship there named the Excelsior and Scotty makes fun of it. Grace Lee Whitney is wearing a wig and I have no idea if she's meant to be Rand or not. Let's just ignore her. McCoy is acting crazy (DeForest Kelley does a great crazy face) and talking like Spock. He took the death hard, I guess!
An Admiral with a moustache reveals that the Enterprise is being decommissioned because it's "twenty years old" and I guess he forgot about Christopher Pike. Fuck that Admiral.
David Marcus and New Saavik arrive at Genesis on a science ship. They locate Spock's "tube" and detect lifeforms.
Sarek(!) comes to see Kirk. He's angry at Kirk for leveaing Spock's body on Genesis and talks about Spock's Katra and stuff and Kirk doesn't know what the fuck he's going on about. He mind melds with Kirk and finds no Katra. Kirk eventually works out that it's in McCoy, after watching a tape recording. You'd think McCoy acting weird and talking in Spock's voice would be enough to give it away but apparently not!
Saavik and David find lifeforms that have quickly evolved from microbes. That's not how evolution works.
Admiral Asshole won't let Kirk go to Genesis for some reason and Kirk says "the word is no...so naturally I'm going to do it anyway" which is a good Kirk line. McCoy's in a space bar that seems inspired by Star Wars but is more like Spaceballs. He talks to an alien who speaks in a really annoying backwards way. Like Yoda if Yoda sucked. FEDERATION SECURITY arrest McCoy. This scene doesn't work for me AT ALL.
Kirk asking McCoy "how many fingers am I holding up" while doing a Vulcan salute, on the other hand, does work for me. It's time to steal the Enterprise! A tall security guard calls Sulu "Tiny" and Sulu beats him up. Scotty says "up yer shaft!" to a turbolift. A bad actor is a dick to Uhura. What's with ALL OF STARFLEET being dicks in this movie? She locks him in the closet. The others steal the Enterprise, which can now be operated by five people. Excelsior tries to catch them using its fancy transwarp but Scotty's broken it. It's a fun sequence, the best part of the movie so far, even if it is highly cheesey in places (how did Mr. Adventure ever get through Starfleet Academy?)
Saavik and David find a Vulcan child. It's the reborn Spock, growing up super fast for reasons. The Captain of their ship is an idiot (as apparently everyone in Starfleet who isn't on the Enterprise is) and their ship is destroyed in one shot by the Bird of Prey.
David admits that he used unstable matter in construction of Genesis and basically he's a big unethical cheat. The planet will be dead soon and Spock's about to hit Pon farr. She does some finger touching with young Spock and the it cuts away. This would be pretty weird for Saavik, having sex (I assume they had sex!) with her former teacher, now in a teenage body. But the movie isn't interested in exploring that. The Klingons capture them the next morning.
The Enterprise shoots the Bird of Prety when it decloaks, but the Enterprise's shileds won't go up (Scotty fucked up!) and the Enterprise is disabled. Kirk and Kruge face off. Kirk gets to speak to David briefly. David dies in Saavik's place. Kirk sits down and misses his chair and calls Kruge a "Klingon bastard." It's a surprisingly effective bit of acting from Shatner.
Kirk surrenders the Enterprise to Kruge but sets the Enterprise to self destruct. The saucer blows up, killing the Klingons who beamed over, then the rest of the Enterprise burns up as Kirk watches from Genesis. It's a sad moment, obviously. Seems a bit weird that after everything the Enterprise has been through it would fall to a few Klingons, but that's how it goes!
Spock goes all Incredible Hulk on a Klingon and Kirk gets to mourn at David's body for a moment. He lies about knowing the secret of Genesis to get Kruge to come down to the dyng planet. They have a fight, kind of like the fights Kirk had in the original series except he doesn't lose his shirt this time. Kirk kicks him into lava saying "I...have had...enough...of YOU!" Kirk and Spock are beamed up to the Bird of Prey in time (there's only one Klingon left...more on that LATER.)
McCoy has a nice moment talking to Spock's regrown body. They arrive at Vulcan where Uhura (remmeber her?) and Sarek are waiting. An old Vulcan woman (ti's Dame Judith Anderson! I guess!) performs the rite to return Spock's Katra to his body. I do enjoy this mystical Vulcan stuff. I like the way the speak! It takes a while and eveyrone paces about looking concerned.
Sarek asks Kirk if it was all worth it. Spock comes walking out (isn't it really convenient that he aged back to the exact age he was at time of death?) and doesn't remember anyone at first. Kirk tells him that the needs of the one outweigh the needs of the many. Spock remember that his name is Jim and the original series theme plays and THIS is actually the best part of the movie.
...and the adventure continues...
This is a weird movie. It has a lot of good stuff in it. Whnever I see it on tv I can watch parts of it and enjoy those parts. But is it actually a good movie in its own right? I don't think it is? Like it exists solely to undo the ending of the previous (great) movie in the series. That's a pretty hard thing to overcome. I feel it has plot issues. Really the whole plot is just "fly to Genesis, fly to Vulcan." Everything else is just there to extend it. Everyone in Starfleet acts like a jerk to Kirk for no reason other than so we can have the stealing the Enterprise sequence (which is good fun!) The Klingons are just thugs who get in the way. What's the actual story here? I guess it's Kirk being willing to do anythng to get Spock back and asking if it's worth all the sacrifice. Is it worth it? I love Spock but he chose to give his life to save the crew. Does getting your best friend back make up for losing your son? I don't know. I feel like that all could have been explored more.
And I really don't like that David died. TWOK had a bittersweet ending with Kirk facing his own mortality after losing Spock, but also facing the possibility of having a relationship with the son he'd just discovered. None of that promsie pays off here as David dies after only a brief conversation with Kirk. He hasn't been around long enough for it to be sad, and while Shatner does a great job reacting to his death it all feels a bit cheap. Like they wanted another shocking death after TWOK and David was the easiest option. I also don't like how they reveal that he was a fraud who cheated with the Genesis Device and that the planet blows up a few days after being created. It feels like they're pissing on a lot of the plot developments from TWOK. And what's with Carol Marcus just being completely ereased from the story?
There's some cool new models here for the Klingon Bird of Prey and Starbase, yet the spaceship stuff doens't look as good as it did in TWOK? I think it's the way they shoot space? It doesn't look as spacey. I don't know. It's a thing.
Nimoy does a decent job as director but Nicholas Meyer did a great job as director so it's hard not to compare the two.
HAVING SAID ALL THAT, there's still plenty to like here!
Pretend that says "III" and it's still true! Shatner gives another strong performance here with lots of quotable lines. I praised his reaction to David's death earlier, but has there ever been a better Shatner line reading than this?
DeForest Kelley is fun as a Bones who is sharing Spock's mind. The rest of the crew don't do much (as usual!) but they're all reliably entertaining. Christopher Lloyd actually does a very good job as Kruge, better than I remembered. The problem is that Kruge lacks an complexity. It's a good bad guy performance, but there's nothing more to the character. And of course any villain is going to suffer compared to Khan. Robin Curtis is not as good a Saavik as Kirstie Alley. She's not terrible but it just adds to the general feeling of the movie being worse than TWOK in every way.
So yeah, it's a movie with lots of good stuff that lacks its own identity. I'm not saying I'm totally against Spock coming back, but having to make a whole movie just to undo the biggest thing that happened in the previous movie is always going to resort in slightly substandard story. I'd probably even say TMP worked better as a movie in its own right than this did.
SCORE: 6.5/10
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The Tomtrek
Love Wookiee
I do kind of like Search for Spock, even though it's totally only works in the context of WoK and if you actually compare it to WoK it looks terrible but still I like of like it?
I actually think a lot of the effects shots are really really good, though.
I'd put pretty much all of the credit for this on ILM and the matte artists, as it's all in direct contrast to Nimoy's direction which is a bit flat and boring.
Like, compare how Nimoy shoots Kirk's apartment:
To how Mayer did it in WoK:
And the less said about Kirk's weird tracksuit the better.
I actually think a lot of the effects shots are really really good, though.
I'd put pretty much all of the credit for this on ILM and the matte artists, as it's all in direct contrast to Nimoy's direction which is a bit flat and boring.
Like, compare how Nimoy shoots Kirk's apartment:
To how Mayer did it in WoK:
And the less said about Kirk's weird tracksuit the better.
Colonel Kira's Left Tit
Bearded Belly of Bajor
This film has grown on me over the years. I thought it was pretty fucking stupid when I first saw it in the theater in 1984, and cringed at the whole stumbling and falling with the "Klingon bastard" line, but now? It works. Not my favorite film from the TOS movie lineup, but it's up there.
And now I think I have to watch it again, because Christopher Lloyd really is probably the best Klingon ever.
And now I think I have to watch it again, because Christopher Lloyd really is probably the best Klingon ever.
CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
Yeah there's definitely some really impressive effects shots, I just think I was comparing the stuff with the Bird Of Prey and the Enterprise fighting with the shots of the Reliant and Enterprise in TWOK and it wasn't as good. And the Genesis planet looks a bit lame.
whisky
Boobie inspector
The enterprise destruction had a bigger impact than Davids death.
This was the first time we had ever seen the enterprise blow up, unlike in the next generation when it was once or twice per season, so when the D got trashed in generations it didnt have the same sort of impact.
Just a shame they spoiled it in the trailers, that would have been incredible to see in the film with no prior knowledge.
This was the first time we had ever seen the enterprise blow up, unlike in the next generation when it was once or twice per season, so when the D got trashed in generations it didnt have the same sort of impact.
Just a shame they spoiled it in the trailers, that would have been incredible to see in the film with no prior knowledge.
Colonel Kira's Left Tit
Bearded Belly of Bajor
Speaking of David's death, that was pretty brutal. I remember marathoning some Star Trek movies with a girlfriend of mine in the late 80s and that actually shocked her, she didn't expect him to either die or die so violently.
CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
I HAVE A QUESTION: at one point Kruge listens to the presentation for Genesis, the exact same presentation from TWOK...except it's Kirk reading it now instead of Carol Marcus. Did Bibi Besch refuse to let her voice be used or were they just too cheap to pay her?
Colonel Kira's Left Tit
Bearded Belly of Bajor
I think they were just too cheap to pay her. As I recall reading somewhere she wanted to come back and do another film and they actually wrote a part for her in there somewhere, but they cut her out at the last minute or something.