Where is the Random Thread of Randomness stuff that doesn't belong in other threads thread?

Mirah

I love you
A couple of weeks ago
I was chopping wood
it wouldn't split
but then I really really needed some kindling
so I went back to the same pieces of wood, with the same ax
and I dn't know what happened but all the sudden all the wood split so quickly
I took a look at that ax
and I think someone secretly sharpened my ax for me!
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
I've got a pair of splitting wedges. When I was getting into the wood splitting business (the current house had a ton of big downed logs when I bought it) I also tried to buy a maul but the big box store didn't have one so I got a "splitting axe," and just figured that was what a maul was called in this part of the country. Of course now I see mauls for sale everywhere--including the store where I bought the axe.

And everything I've read says you need to use a hammer on the wedges but I always just pound them in with the back of the axe.

Oh, and maybe your wood dried out enough that it would split.
 

Mirah

I love you
That makes more sense than friendly neighbors randomly sharpening my ax! But I like the wood nympth theory also.

It seems odd it would be that much more dry in just a couple of weeks-how about temperature? I was just researching that as well.

What is the deal with bark? Everyone around here take it off thier logs and throw it in a pile.

I have so many wood questions. This is my first time as an adult living in a place where a wood stove is the primary source of heat.
 

Eggs Mayonnaise

All In With The Nuts
I'm still watching reruns of Quincy, ME for background noise, and it seems like the larger Jack Klugman's hairpiece becomes the more self-righteous the character becomes. It's kind of hilarious in a way, to the point that I'm wondering whose wig would win in a standoff. Klugman's or Shatner's?
Dustin Hoffman would have to be the judge, just sayin
 

Loktar

Pinata Whacker
I've got a pair of splitting wedges. When I was getting into the wood splitting business (the current house had a ton of big downed logs when I bought it) I also tried to buy a maul but the big box store didn't have one so I got a "splitting axe," and just figured that was what a maul was called in this part of the country. Of course now I see mauls for sale everywhere--including the store where I bought the axe.

And everything I've read says you need to use a hammer on the wedges but I always just pound them in with the back of the axe.

Oh, and maybe your wood dried out enough that it would split.
I was going to buy a maul or maybe a mall but then said fuck it and bought a Darth Maul action figure. So much cheaper and less real estate fraud.
 

Colonel Kira's Left Tit

Bearded Belly of Bajor
GqHS3Yn.jpeg
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
There's a trope that life would be boring without challenge and struggle. I just quickly and easily won 2 games of Solitaire, back to back, and want to say I'd be interested to see how long it would take for me to get bored with things being easy. Because I feel like I could really embrace quickly and easily getting anything I wanted. I feel like I could play Life in "God Mode" for an awful long time before getting tired of it; opening the mailbox to stacks of checks, just walking up to random hot women and getting sex, not being stuck in traffic...nope, not seeing the downside.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
Lately I've been watching a lot of Story Television. It's one of those secondary digital broadcast channels that replays old History Channel and A&E stuff. I've been enjoying it but it's starting to get...familiar? You know pretty much what the narrator is going to say and how he's going to say it for maximum drama.

If I had more time and money than I knew what to do with, I'd make bogus documentaries.

"Tonight on the History Channel: the thrilling story of a daring raid into the heart of Nazi Germany--the men who teabagged Hitler."
"December, 1942. With allied forces still tied up in North Africa, Germany locked in a deadly stalemate with the Soviet Union and Nazi U-boats threatening the slender allied lifeline to Britain, a plan was hatched to end the war--or at least damage the morale of Germany while raising the spirits of the Allies..."
 

Eggs Mayonnaise

All In With The Nuts
He's going for a sort of Robert Benchley film short kind of vibe, but without the overt funny... Benchley did many short films in the 30s/40s and was a member of the Algonquin Round Table and a close friend/confidante of Dorothy Parker

 

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
I ordered a Double Big Mac at a drive through but when we got home found they'd only given me a regular-sized Big Mac. Pissed me off a lot. Regular Big Macs are for babies.
 

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
Sometimes they don't give you straws!
 
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