JULY 1st CANADA DAY! Welcome Your Majesty! Enjoy the fireworks!
so it's 3:42AM and I hear this banging and rustling outside. raccoon. go downatairs, see shadow in garbage can, which is knocked over. get brilliant idea to scare raccoon away then spray can with bleach spray I use for porcelain sink in kitchen (I told you my house is 99 yrs old, right?)
so go outside, do all that and after realise I have sprayed my foot with bleach. forgot to put on shoes. go in wash foot go back to bed.
CRASH! RUSTLE RUSTLE RUSTLE.
oh FUCK!
back downstairs, the MOFOs at it AGAIN. fine this time I go out screaming like a banshee (hey it's a holiday, the neighbours can bloodywell just sleep in) wielding not just the javex but also a random broom I grabbed on the way by. I spray again, get two recycling blue boxes, build a complicated tower by the garbage can with said boxes and broom, and then discover I've got bleach on the hand that righted the garbage can. didnt put on gloves.
went BACK in, washed the HAND, and went to bed.
checked this AM and, other than looking rather eccentric in the middle of the driveway, ALL'S WELL ON THE NORTHERN FRONT.