Star Wars: Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker???????

[The Tomtrek]

Guys they're doing another one of those "Star Wars" films.



I hope it will be good and fun like The Last Jedi and not "OK" and "Pretty bland" like The Force Awakens.

Thank you

 

[CaptainWacky]

It's pretty weird how the name is designed to make you think Rey is going to turn out to be a Skywalker after a pretty big plot point of the previous movie was that her parents were no one important. Of course it could mean Ben turns good at the end and changes his name to "Skywalker" or something. Or there...is...another...Sky...walker?

Palpatine for some reason?

But Lando's cool.

 

[whisky]

Peice of death star at the end?

 

[Mentalist]

I had just about stopped caring about nuWars but they pulled me right back in with that Lando shot. I'm such a sucker.

 

[CaptainWacky]

...I really can't get over how weird it is that the trailer literally has Luke saying "THIS IS YOUR STORY NOW" but then the movie's titled 'The Rise of SKYWALKER DON'T WORRY FORTY YEAR OLD MEN IT WAS ABOUT THE SKYWALKERS ALL ALONG.'

 

[Mentalist]

The last two feel seriously slapped together from a narrative standpoint. Be quite a job bringing it home in a cohesive and satisfying manner now. I hope they do, I'm not sure they will.

 

[whisky]

From a literal point of view, Ray starts the trailer walking in the sky, just saying.

 

[CaptainWacky]

It'll obviously just be the thing everyone's already predicted where Rey says "We are not Jedi anymore. We are all Skywalker(s) now!" and everyone groans then BB-8 explodes.

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

 

[Volpone]

Why doesn't she just Force Choke the TIE fighter pilot? Problem solved.

 

[whisky]

I don't think you can force choke another force user.

Besides I think this might be a dagoba cave situation.

 

[Volpone]

We know she could drop a ton of boulders on it. And that you can use the Force to throw inanimate objects at another force user.

Also, the Millennium Falcon needs a cupholder so Lando can have a Colt 45.

 

[Volpone]

The trailer doesn't look horrible. But it doesn't look particularly good either. I look forward to it the way I looked forward to whatever the last prequel was called..."Revenge of the Sith"?...so I can say I watched them all and be done with it. Lucas was right the first time, making a trilogy to use up ideas that he couldn't fit into one 2 hour movie.

 

[The Tomtrek]

LOOK THERE ARE PICTURES

https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2019/05/star-wars-cover-story?verso=true

 

[CaptainWacky]

Is R2 a force ghost now.

 

[whisky]

Flashback again?

 

[Volpone]

I'm not excited.

 

[CaptainWacky]

It's sad that I can 100% accurately predict the entire script based on this poster.

(Rey and Kylo are fighting. Palpatine's ghost appears.)

Palpatine: Good gooood you are fighting because I maniupulated everything you've ever done for some reason also Snoke was a guy dressed up.

Kylo: Then I will TURN GOOD by killing you, ghost!

Rey: We kill him TOGETHER.

(They hold hands and Palpatine melts.)

Rey: Does this means there's hope for the Reylo shippers?

Kylo: I mean just because I killed a guy who was maniuplating me doesn't mean I'm necessarily boyfriend material?

(Some rocks fall on Kylo killing him so we don't have to answer that question.)

Rey: Oh well!

Luke's Ghost: By the way I'm your dad and Leia's your mum.

Rey: Wait what.

DIRECTED BY J.J. ABRAMS

 

[The Tomtrek]

lol

 

[whisky]

At first I thought it was a fan film with all the clips from the other films. They didn't give us much new footage.

Also forget about evil clone Rey, what's up with evil 3PO did Anakin make himself another one once he was Vader?