SPAMCAPITAL OMEGA: THE REMAKE OF THE REMAKE OF THE SPAM

[The Dork Lord]

It sent a pang across his heart to think how this old
gentleman would look upon him when they met; but he
knew what path lay straight before him, and he took it.

 

[The Dork Lord]

"My dear sir," said Scrooge, quickening his pace, and
taking the old gentleman by both his hands. "How do you
do? I hope you succeeded yesterday. It was very kind of
you. A merry Christmas to you, sir!"

 

[The Dork Lord]

"Mr. Scrooge?"

 

[The Dork Lord]

"Yes," said Scrooge. "That is my name, and I fear it
may not be pleasant to you. Allow me to ask your pardon.
And will you have the goodness"--here Scrooge whispered in
his ear.

 

[The Dork Lord]

"Lord bless me!" cried the gentleman, as if his breath were
taken away. "My dear Mr. Scrooge, are you serious?"

 

[The Dork Lord]

"If you please," said Scrooge. "Not a farthing less. A
great many back-payments are included in it, I assure you.
Will you do me that favour?"

 

[The Dork Lord]

"My dear sir," said the other, shaking hands with him.
"I don't know what to say to such munifi--"

 

[The Dork Lord]

"Don't say anything, please," retorted Scrooge. "Come
and see me. Will you come and see me?"

 

[The Dork Lord]

"I will!" cried the old gentleman. And it was clear he
meant to do it.

 

[The Dork Lord]

"Thank'ee," said Scrooge. "I am much obliged to you.
I thank you fifty times. Bless you!"

 

[The Dork Lord]

He went to church, and walked about the streets, and
watched the people hurrying to and fro, and patted children
on the head, and questioned beggars, and looked down into
the kitchens of houses, and up to the windows, and found
that everything could yield him pleasure.

 

[The Dork Lord]

He had never dreamed that any walk--that anything--could
give him so much happiness. In the afternoon he turned his
steps towards his nephew's house.

 

[The Dork Lord]

He passed the door a dozen times, before
he had the courage to go up and knock.

 

[The Dork Lord]

But he made a dash, and did it:

 

[The Dork Lord]

"Is your master at home, my dear?"
said Scrooge to the girl. Nice girl! Very.

 

[The Dork Lord]

"Yes, sir."

 

[The Dork Lord]

"Where is he, my love?" said Scrooge.

 

[The Dork Lord]

"He's in the dining-room, sir, along with mistress.
I'll show you up-stairs, if you please."

 

[The Dork Lord]

"Thank'ee. He knows me," said Scrooge, with his hand
already on the dining-room lock. "I'll go in here, my dear."

 

[The Dork Lord]

He turned it gently, and sidled his face in, round the door.