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Wacky Reviews: Star Trek

The Enemy - Riker, Worf and Geordi find wreckage from a Romulan vessel on a lightning-y planet in Federation space. They find one injured Romulan and Geordi falls down a hole. The storm means Geordi has to be at the right place to transport so he's trapped down there (Riker even yells at O'Brien, which is a bit harsh!) Crusher reports the injured Romulan's brain is breaking and the same thing will happen to Geordi. Riker questions the Romulan but he won't say shit. Geordi climbs out of his hole. Romulan Commander Tomalak (Andreas Katsulas) makes his first appearance as he arrives to rescue his Romulans and spars with Picard. He's a cool dude. Picard doesn't want a war. Wesley came up with a type of probe to communicate with Geordi but before Geordi can use it he's attacked by another Romulan. But rocks fall on the Romulan and Geordi helps him because he's a nice guy. The Romulan still holds his gun to Geordi after that because he's a Romulan. Crusher finds out that only Worf has the matching blood/cells (I'm not a doctor) needed to save the dying Romulan on the Enterprise. Worf won't do it because Romulans killed his parents.

Geordi and his Romulan (Bochra) talk about the differences between their people (the Romulan is disgusted that Geordi's parents let him live blind.) Geordi can see with his VISOR that the planet is fucking them up but the stubborn Romulan won't let them be beamed to the Enterprise. Tomalak wants to come and rescue his Romulans but Picard won't let him enter Federation space. Geordi finally convinces Bochra to activate the Enterprise beacon so they can be rescued, but his VISOR shuts down leaving him blind. Riker tries to convince Worf that not all Romulans deserve to die. Crusher shows him the dying Romulan. The Romulan says he'd rather die than pollute his body with Klingon filth. So would Crusher have forced him to take the treatment if Worf had agreed? Bochra's legs don't work and Geordi is blind, but they work together to try to activate the beacon. Tomalak shows up and Picard goes to red alert. Picard tells Worf that if their Romulan patient dies it could lead to war. Worf says he'll save the Romulan if Picard orders him but Picard won't. It's a strong scene. The Romulan dies. Picard tells Tomalak about the dead Romulan and the war is about to begin, when Geordi activates the beacon and Data detects two life igns. Picard bluffs a bit with Tomalak and lowers the Enterprise shields to beam Geordi and Bochra to the Bridge. Bochra tells Tomalak about his new best friend Geordi. Picard makes Worf escort Bochra to the transpoer room with Geordi to shame Worf.

This is damn good Star Trek! I really like how it constrasts the way Geordi and Bochra work together with how Worf and the other Romulan hate each other so much that the Romulan dies. And Worf doesn't come across as a villain here or anything, you can understand his point of view even if it distasteful to enlightened 24th century human sensibilities. Tomalak is a great new character (who sadly will only be in three more episodes...and in two of them he isn't real) and this feels like the first proper full-on Romulan episode. A strong episode!

SCORE: 9/10
 
The Price - It's a Troi episode! Let's see how it goes. She wants a real chocolate sundae but the replicator won't give her one. We see that Troi actually does have a bit of a personality when not sensing things. There's delegates onboard who will be negotiating for control of the first stable wormhole, owned by the Barzan. She meets a handsome negotiator Ral (Matt McCoy) working for some aliens. And then some Ferengi show up and want to be part of the negotiations. That's just what we need! Picard has to give them his chair. Troi and Ral start heavy flirting with each other really fast. I'm not judging! Picard, Riker and Data doubt that the wormhole really is stable. The Ferengi come up with a wacky scheme to poison the Federation negotiator and Riker has to take over from him. Troi wears a different outfit to show that she's off duty as Ral keeps accusing her of always being a counselor. They have the sex. Data and Geordi go out in a shuttle to investigate the wormhole, as do the Ferengi. We keep cutting back to scenes of Troi and Ral doing foot stuff while cheesey romantic music plays. Ral asks her about her relationship with Riker. He admits to her that he's a quarter Betazoid and that helps him as a negotiator. He never realised how much he needed his heart until he met Troi!

Data and Geordi end up in the Delta Quadrant(!) when they were supposed to be somewhere else. The wormhole is shit. We get to see Troi and Crusher in their working out clothes, which is amazing. Ral shows his sleazey side by convincing one of the alien factions to drop out and looking smug. Data and Geordi warn the Ferengi that the wormhole isn't stable but they won't listen because Ferengi are dumb. They end up stranded. That's the last we'll see of them! Troi accues Ral of being a conman. She uses her empathy for good, he uses it to make money (or whatever they pay him in?) Ral tries to get to Riker and mocks him for being only second in command of the ship. The Ferengi fire on the wormhole. Ral ells the Barzan leader that the Federation and the Ferengi are too violent for her wormhole. Troi senses that the Ferengi Captain is lying. Ral wins control of the wormhole for whoever he's representing and gives the Ferengi free access to it and ends the stand off. Troi outs Ral and the Ferengi Captain as being in cahoots. Data and Geordi come back and reveal that the wormhole is unstable and worthless. Troi and Ral have a final scene where he admits he's made her take a hard look at who he is. He wants Troi to run away with him but she's not going to do that.

I like the idea of an episode showing Troi's private life. All the other characters get them, so why not her? The opening scene where she wants ice cream is pretty good! But all the scenes with Ral? I didn't like them much! I don't think they worked. He already seems a bit dodgy even before we find out he's a slippery negotiator. The wormhole stuff is fine but nothing exciting. The Ferengi are bad. This isn't very good but at least it takes a step in the right direction for Troi.

SCORE: 5.5/10
 
The Vengeance Factor - A Federation science outpost is raided by a race of "gatherers" who are basically space pirates. They meet the Sovereign of their race and she doesn't want the gatherers back because they're dicks. She has a young female chef who catches Riker's eye. They find the Gatherer camp and lots of stolen stuff. The Gatherers attack the away team. They have long hair and scars and wear leather and stuff because they're tough. Worf tells them off for not bathing! The Sovereign tries to negotiate peace but they just like getting drunk and laughing loudly. Chef girl kills an old man Gatherer by causing him to have a heart attack. The Gatherer leader makes fun of Wesley. Riker and chef have a boring conversation. Crusher finds out there's a micro virus that only kills Gatherers with certain DNA.

Chef comes on to Riker but she wants to be a servant in the bedroom whereas he wants women to be equal in matters of love. Some more Gatherers attack the Enterprise but it's pretty non-exciting. This new Gatherer leader (I think he's the leader of all of them, he's fat) is an even bigger dick. He has a boring conversation with the Sovereign. Crusher and Data do some boring detective work to figure out what's going on with the dead person. They find out that chef girl is actually really old and hasn't aged in 53 years. Picard tells the Sovereign and the fat guy that they're alike (they're both bad actors?) Chef girl is going to kill fat guy and Riker arrives to stop her. His family killed hers a hundred years ago and she's out for revenge. Riker tries to reason with her. He keeps shooting her with a phaser but I guess she's super strong so he has to put up the power and kill her. Riker is sad he had to kill this murderer who he had one scene with.

This episode is shit. The story is shit, the guest actors are mostly shit or don't get anything to do. Riker and the girl hardly even interact and we're supposed to believe he's broken up killing her after she's killed countless people for a century. There's nothing good about it really.

SCORE: 2/10
 
The Defector - We start with Data playing at Shakespeare in the Holodeck, with a heavily made-up Patrick Stewart playing a Shakespeare hologram. Then Picard shows up so that's weird! A Romulan shows up being chased by some other Romulans and requests asylum. The defector's scout ship is damaged and he ends up in Federation space, so the Enterprise saves him. No one really trusts the low ranking Romulan (Setal, played by James Sloyan) because, you know, he's a Romulan, but he has news of an upcoming Romulan offensive. The Romulan scout ship explodes just before Geordi can beam over and steal all its secrets. Setal says he's not a traitor, he just doesn't want war. Crusher sasses Worf by bringing up that she recently had another Romulan patient. Good continuity! The Romulan hates Klingons too and everyone swears at each other and I'm digging it. Setal looks at a suicide pill when he's alone. Picard and Data can't find the Romulan fleet and secret base Setal told them about. Picard tells Data to keep a history of current events because they could be going to war. Riker and Troi question Setal. Picard gets a message from a Klingon ship and sends Worf off to deal with it. Wonder what that could be about! Geordi and Data talk about intuition and facts. It's a good scene.

Data watches Setal in Ten Forward, trying to see what his guts tell him. Setal misses his home so Data creates it in the Holodeck for him, which is nice. But he says he doesn't belong there anymore. He reveals that he's really Admiral Jarok and is ready to tell the whole truth to Picard. He's famous for commiting a massacre, but he argues to Picard that one world's butcher is another world's hero. Jarok talks about how he'll never see his daughter again, but at least she'll get to grow up if they can stop the war. Picard won't until Jarok gives up all his Romulan secrets and they finally enter the Neutral Zone. They can't find the secret Romulan base. Jarok doesn't understand. Picard wonders if it was all a test of his loyalty. Tomalak shows up with two Romulan Warbirds and attacks the Entrprise. He's all smug about the evil plan and wants to display the Enterprise hull in the Romulan capital. He asks Picard to surrender or die, but Picard has his own secret plan: three Klingon Birds of Prey decloak. They were escorting the Enterprise all along! It's another great Picard/Tomalak scene to remind you that there really should have been more of them. Jarok says he did all this for nothing and takes his suicide pill. He leaves a letter for his wife and daughter and Picard hopes he can deliver it one day.

This in Ron Moore's second episode and it's far superior to his first. It's better than most TNG episode at this point. It's pretty great! James Sloyan does a fanastic job as Jarok. The story is full of twists where you don't know if Jarok is telling the truth or if he's being fooled and that moment where the Klingons show up is classic. Season three has been great for Romulan episodes. Data gets some nice moment too. This is near top level stuff.

SCORE: 9.5/10
 
The Hunted - Tall actor James Cromwell makes his first Trek appearance (with a moustache!) as Prime Minister of a planet that wants to join the Federation. A prisoner escapes and Picard has Data track him down, but he somehow escapes and everyone is surprised/impressed. Riker works out that how to find him, but the prisoner seems to make a suicide run at the Enterprise. Instead he bounces off the shields and escapes in a tube. He immune to phaser stuns and beats up O'Brien(!) and some security guards. Worf and Riker finally pin him. Troi sense to his turmoil and goes to counsel him. He sasses her. Troi suspects he isn't just some violent criminal. She and Data find out he's a soldier and commited no crime. He's done some violent shit in the war and had has been programmed to be the perfect soldier. He was locked up because they made him too perfect a solider and he wouldn't be able to live in normal society. Data talks to him about his own programming. James Cromwell wants him back. Troi and Data both believe in him.

The prisoner manages to break out of a transporter beam when O'Brien is trying to beam him out...which doesn't really make sense? How you can you break out of something when you're partly dematerialised. So we get another escape sequnece and he beats up Geordi this time. He keeps tricking everyone with his clever tactics. He can't even be defeated by poisoned gas! He drops some boxes on Worf. He goes back to the planet and breaks out some of his fellow impisoned soldiers. James Cromwell wants Picard's help to catch the soliders, but Troi says the soldiers will only kill if their lives are threatened. Picard, Worf and Troi tell off James Cromwell for abandoning his soldiers. The soldiers show up demanding to be heard. Picard says he can't interfere anymore and it's up to the Prime Minister to settle things. Picard thinks everything will work out for the best and leaves.

So yeah, there's nothing really wrong with this episode, but it's not very interesting either? It's fine. Forgettable, but not bad. It's okay.

SCORE: 6.5/10
 
The High Ground - The Enterprise arrives at a planet that has experience terrorist attacks from separatists, right in time for another explosion. Crusher treats the wounded despite Worf's protests. A terrorist beams in and kidnaps Crusher, using some kind of undetectable transporter. Picard and Troi explain terrorism to Wesley. The lady head of security on the planet says allthe separatists are animals who should be killed and stuff. She wants some Federation weaponry but Picard won't give her any, of course. Finn the terrorist keeps trying to get Crusher to talk. He took her because he needs a doctor and thinks the Federation have been supporting the other side. Policewoman tells Riker about the terrorists blowing up school children. Finn explains that his transporter uses dimensional shifting and that's why his people are sick. Wesley works this out at the same time because he's Wesley. Riker sees kids being arrested by cops because children can be terrorists too. Finn compares himself to George Washington, fighting a war for independance. Crusher can't get over the whole "killing innocent people" thing. Riker annoys policewoman by saying he's willing to negotiate for Crusher's release.

Data talks about how he's been reviewing history and terrorism is often effective, such as the Irish reunification of 2024. Uhh, what. I don't think that's going to happen. Wonder if an American would have written that line after 9/11? The terrorists attack the Enterprise and kill some redshirts. Geordi does an awesome dive and saves the Enterprise from being blown up. Finn beams onto the Bridge and Picard punches him, which is also awesome, before he takes Picard hostage too. Crusher tells Picard she has some sympathy for Finn and Picard points out that he just tried to kill Wesley. Finn plans to get the Federation involved so that they'll force the government to make concessions to them. Crusher lets Finn know that she's scared of him getting power becaue he uses fear as a weapon, but he's done a drawing of her so maybe he isn't so bad? Crusher is about to tell Jean-Luc some things when Riker, Worf and the cops stage a rescue. Police lady kills Finn. A kid is going to shoot her but Crusher says "no more killing" and he didn't. It's a bit cheesey but it's TNG so that's kind of what you want.

It' the terrorism episode! And it's pretty good! Finn is a decent character who gets some good lines. The police lady is a hardass but it's understandable why she would be. The Irish reunification line is unfortunate, and the episode was banned by the BBC as a result. Which is stupid because surely they could have just edited out that one line? Wouldn't have been hard!

SCORE: 8.5/10
 
Deja Q - The Enterprise is helping some bad actor aliens who are about to be crushed by their own moon. Then Q suddenly appears naked and suspended in mid air on the Bridge and says "red alert!" That's a pretty great teaser. Picard thinks Q is responsible for the moon falling, but he claims to have been kicked out of the Continuum and turned into a human. Q asks what he has to do to convince them he's human and Worf says "die" in another great Worf one-liner! Worf says Q has fooled them too many times and Q mentions "the boy who cried Worf." There's a weird noise and light on the Bridge as the ship is being probed by something. Q says he can help stop the moon falling because he's still has knowledge even without his powers. Data is tasked with looking after Q, which is good because Data wants to be human but isn't and Q is but doesn't! Q's solution to the moon problem is to change the gravitional constant of the universe. He hurts his back and Crusher treats him, but he gets hungry and goes to Ten Forward. He orders ten chocolate sundaes. Guinan shows up and stabs Q's hand with a fork to see if he really is human. It's a fun scene! A gas alien thing shows up and attacks Q but Data saves him. Picard works out that Q came to the Enterprise for protection because he has so many enemies.

Data tries to instruct Q on how to get on with people. The moon aliens keep insisting Picard help them faster. They're pretty annoying. Geordi, Data and Q try to stop the moon killing everyone. Q's still being a dick. They nearly do it but the gas alien shows up again and ruins them. Data risks his own life to save Q. Picard and Q talk and Q admits he feels ashmed thinking about how he wouldn't have done the same thing for Data. Q goes out in a shuttle to lead the gas alien away from the Enterprise so they can save the planet. Another Q shows up and admits he's impressed that Q did something selfless. He can't let Q die because of this so he gives his powers back. Q deals with the gas alien and appears with a mariachi band on the Enterprise. He gives Riker some women but Riker rejects them and Q says "you weren't like that before the beard" and it's great. He gives Data a full on human laugh. He rescues the planet as well because this is the start of the nicer Q.

It's a straight-up fun comedy episode! The previous comedy episode 'Manhunt' was pretty terrible but this has a much better script and John de Lancie being great. Q could justbe really annoying if it wasn't for de Lancie. Teaming him up with Data was a good move. I like how Q has had proper character development in his four appearances so far. He initially wasn't impressed by humans at all, then he became interested in them and tried to turn Riker into a Q to study them, then he tried to actually help the Enterprise in his own way (but got people killed) by letting them know about the Borg. Now he's actually been human himself and can kind of understand them and is able to do nice things, but it feels like a natural progression after what he's been through. The moon aliens were annoyng but otherwise this is another strong season 3 episode.

SCORE: 9/10
 
The BBC banning manhunt is what got me to start buying the videos (yes VHS) videos of TNG, that led to DS9 and Yovager.

A fortune I spent on them, and all of them went down the rubbish shute in the end.
 
A Matter of Perspective - Picard paints a naked lady. Data isn't impressed. The Enterprise arrives at a space station where Dr. Apgar is trying to create some weird wave thing. Riker is beamed off by O'Brien (the real hero) right when the station explodes. Apgar was the only person onboard when it exploded. The chief investigator from the planet the station was orbiting beams over and arrests Riker on suspicion of murder. He's like one of those chiefs of police from Murder She Wrote who always gets it wrong! Picard manages to convince him to have the Holodeck recreate the events leading up to the crime. We watch Riker's version of events first where Apgar is a dick and his wife keeps flirting with Riker. It has some great Riker reactions to the flirting. It ends with Riker politely rejecting her advances and Apgar trying to punch Riker but Riker easily avoiding it. The investigator reports that a phaser was fired right before Riker beamed out and suggests that Riker shot the reactor. Meanwhile Geordi and Wes investigate some weird radiation that's making holes appear in the ship. The Widow Apgar shows up so her version of events can play in the Holodeck. She casts herself as a devoted wife and Riker as a leering letch. And Jonathan Frakes is just awesome playing this exaggerated version of Riker. She claims Riker tried to force himself on her and that Riker beat up her husband (great Riker facepalm at this.)

The weird radiation shows up in Sickbay and Crusher has to run from it. I hope someone sorts out that weird radiation! Apgar's assistant gives details of Apgar's version of events and that plays on the Holodeck too (because of weird alien law.) It's the best version yet as it has Apgar beating up Riker and Riker declaring "You're a dead man, Aprgar! A DEAD MAN!" in a hilariously cheesey way. Picard thinks he has no choice but to allow Riker to be extradited, even though he obviously doesn't want it. Geordi and Wesley figure out what's going on with the radiation and Picard shows what really happened in the Holodeck. Apgar had been claiming not to have created the waves but the Holodeck version of the lab WAS creating his waves (somehow!) so that means he was lying and really had created the waves and was holding out for more money from the Ferengi or Romulans. Picard finally shows what really happened: Apgar tried to shoot Riker with a phaser when he was about to beam out but the phaser blast bounced back off the transporter beam and hit the reactor. This all takes WAY too long as Picard and Geordi explain it all in great detail before showing the Holodeck version of what happened. Far too much talking when they have a Holodeck that could just show us. Anyway, Riker is cleared and the whole matter of Apgar's widow accusing him of rape isn't brought up again.

So this episode isn't great or anything and I can see people forgetting it easily. But I've always liked it and found it entertaining. I guess it's because I love Murder She Wrote so much? And also the idea of showing different versions of events on the Holodeck is a fun one and it gives Jonathan Frakes a chance to play wacky new versions of Riker (which is never not great.) It is definitely too talky and slow in its climax and the whole thing about the Holodeck creating the weird radiation is silly (does that thing even have safeties?) And the fact that the wife's accusations of sexual assault are just ignored is problematic, really! But yeah I still enjoy the episode mainly due to the Rikerness.

SCORE: 7.5/10
 
Yesterday's Enterprise - Worf drinks prune juice(!) with Guinan and talks about how Earth women are too fragile for him. A wormhole like thing appears and suddenly the ship is different: it's more military looking, everyone's a bit harder, everyone's wearing belts, Wesley's an officer, Worf is gone and Yar is back. Guinan senses something isn't right. A ship comes through the wormhole, the Enterprise-C. That's quite the teaser! The Enterprise-C was presumed destroyed 22 years ago. It's Captain Rachel Garrett reports they were attacked by Romulans. The ship is badly damaged with lots of dead crewmembers. Guinan coms to the Bridge and tells Picard everything is wrong. She tells Picard there should be children on the ship and he's outraged (which would be reasonable even in the right timeline.) She wants him to send the Enterprise-C back in time. Picard tells Garrett about her time travelling and explains that they've been at war with the Kingons for years. Maybe if the Enterprise-C had rescued some Klingons that would have helped relations! Yar and an Enterprise-C guy start to like each other. Picard and Guinan argue about if it's correct to send the E-C back to die. Patrick Stewart's delivery of "not good enough, not good enough damn it!" is great. Guinan sees Tasha and senses that she's meant to have been killed by an unconvincing oil slick man. Picard lets everyone in on what Guinan's said and her mysterious powers. He's decided to send the E-C back, despite Riker's protests.

Tasha suspects she's supposed to dead. Picard admits to Garrett that the Federation is losing the war with the Klingons. She's convinced to get back in time. Yar says a sad goodbye to her new boyfriend. Klingons attack and Captain Garrett dies when her console explodes and rocks come out of it. I guess it's because her ship was old. Yar's boyfriend wants to take the E-C back himself. Tasha confronts Guinan and Guinan admits they were never meant to meet and Tasha died a pointless death. Tasha goes to Picard and tells him she wants to go with the E-C. He dosn't want to let someone he know well die. But Tasha figures she'll be dead if the timeline changes and would rather die for something important. Riker mentions "Archer 4", OBVIOUSLY a reference to the greatest Captain!? The Klingons show up and Picard says "let's make sure history never forgets the name Enterprise." The Enterprise-D protects the C while it slowly flies into the time rift. Riker is killed by some rocks as this is a weird timeline. Picard says "that'll be the day" and jumps over to the weapons to shoot the Klingons and it's amazing. Everything instantly changes back to normal as soon as the E-C flies through the rift. Guinan asks Geordi about Tasha Yar.

Hey you probably know how great this episode is. It's not overrated at all, it really is that good. It's the first "alternative timeline" episode (unless you count 'Mirror, Mirror'!? But that's kind of different!?) and it's still one of the best. The changes to the Enterprise-D are actually kind of subtle in a lot of ways, such as Picard attacking a bit more tought but not going all out aggressive military Captain. He's still Picard just a Picard with 22 years of different experiences. I never liked Denise Crosby's acting much but she's good here. Maybe it's because the writing is better. Captain Garrett is a convincing Captain in her short appearance. All the ships have rocks in them for some reason. No, but really, it's great.

SCORE: 10/10
 
The Offspring - Riker is away on personal leave (lots of sex.) Data has sent for Geordi, Wesley and Troi as he's been locked in his lab doing something mysterious. He's created an android child! Named Lal! Lal doesn't understand clothes and calls Data "father". He discovered a new technique at a conference and we able to continue Dr. Soong's work for the first time. Picard says he would have liked to have been consulted but Data points out that no one else onboard has consulted him about procreation. He's also going to let Lal decided its own sex and appearance, to the delight of tumblr probably! Picard and Data debate what he's done. Data wants to continue his species (or whatever you'd call him.) Data, Troi and Lal go through several thousand choices for Lal's apperance in the Holodeck. One's a cheap looking Andorian! A human male or female! A Klingon male! She chooses the cute human female (Hallie Todd.) It's a pretty silly scene really? Lal is educated in a delightful montage. She asks Data loads of questions as she becomes sentient. Admiral Haftel wants to take Lal to a Starbase to study her. It's a bit of a retread of 'The Measure of a Man' and probably the weak point of this episode? Lal struggles at school with both older and young children. Data asks Beverly for parenting advice. She basically tells him Wesley was like a robot growing up. Data says he's incapable of giving Lal love. We get to see Picard's bare chest(!) as he sleeps in bed and the Admiral calls him. He's coming to the ship to review Lal's development.

Lal goes to Ten Forward to learn human behaviour. She uses a contraction and Data is amazed because he can't. I still hate that contraction thing. Data doesn't want the Admiral to take his daughter. Lal watches people kiss but isn't ready to know about sex yet. Riker comes back and Lal kisses him. Riker runs out when Data asks his intentions towards his daughter. Jonathan Frakes directed this episode (his first!) and it's a fun cameo. Lal holds Data's hand it's sweet. Picard and Admiral Over The Top repeat some arguments with heard before. The Admiral isn't imprssed by Lal working in a bar. He's a dick. And this scene's a bit stupid, really? Why shouldn't she be in a bar? It's not like Ten Forward is full of violent drunks. Lal tells the Admiral she wishes to stay on the Enterprise. Lal starts feeling emotions and can't handle it. The Admiral and Data debate what should happen to Lal some more and it's kind of boring. I just want more Data/Lal scenes, not all this stuff. He orders Data to give up Lal and Picard says he won't let him order a man to hand over his child. Luckily Lal is dying now so we don't get another courtroom scene. The Admiral tries to help Data save Lal but it doesn't work. Lal tells Data she loves him and she will feel it for both of them. She thanks Data for her life and dies. Data transfers Lal's memories into himself but still can't use contractions.

This episode...isn't as good as I remembered it being!? I mean there's great stuff. Hallie Todd is fantastic as Lal, Brent Spiner is great as usual. All their scenes are very good and her death is really sad. There's good comedy too like the Riker scene. But man that Admiral sucks. The actor plays him like a villain rather than a concerned Starfleet Admiral. There's so many scenes of him talking to Picard or Data that just feel like an attempt to do what 'The Measure of a Man' did and they don't come close to it. I wish they'd just done a whole episode about Data and Lal rather than trying to shoves this plot in becaue it's not good. Also there was no chance Lal was going to decide to look like a Klingon so why even put that in. Anyway, yeah, this is still very good with great stuff but the writing isn't quite good enough.

SCORE: 8.5/10
 
Sins of the Father - After Riker previously served on a Klingon ship, Commander Kurn (Tony Todd) is now serving on the Enterprise as first officer. He's going to bring a sense of discipline to the Enterprise! He tells off Wesley for whipsering to Data. Good! Everyone complains to Riker that Kurt has been hard on them, but the only crewmember he isn't hard on is Worf who he's super nice to. Worf doesn't like this, obviously. Kurn doesn't like Riker's advice to stop being such a Klingon. There's a dinner party for Kurn where he says "just a short time ago I had to stop myself from killing Commander Riker" and it's pretty great. He mocks Worf for liking bland human food. Worf goes to see him and asks what's up. Worf throws a chair and they nearly fight. He is a Klingon! Kurn is impressed at last and admits that Worf is his older brother! Kurn stayed behind when their parents were murdered. The Klingon High Council have judged Worf's father a traitor who aided the Romulans (the very Romulans who killed him!) Kurt wants Worf to challenge the Council's ruling, even though under Klingon law that would mean Worf would be executed if his father is found guilty. Picard will let him...but only if he gets to stand by Worf's side during the challenge. Kurn will stand as Worf's Cha'Dlch and we get to hear Tony Todd speak in Klingon. Worf doesn't want Kurn to reveal his true parentage as he'll be executed as well. Then we get to see the Klingon homeworld for the first time! Worf challenges the lies spoken of his father to Chancellor K'mpec and faces Duras, the Klingon accusing his father. Duras is a dick to Picard but K'mpec respects him. Duras backhands Worf and rips his sash off but Worf says it's a good day to die. K'mpec goes to Worf and asks him to drop the challenge and go back to his Starfleet life. He was a friend of Worf's father Mogh's and doesn't want these accusations being brought up. Worf wont' do so and is surprised by K'mpec's unKlingonlike behaviour.

Duras confronts Kurn and reveals he knows of Kurn's true parentage. He wants Kurn to turn against Worf but Kurn won't do it so Duras has his men attack Kurn. Data finds transmissions from Mogh to the Romulans before the attack. Worf wants Picard to replace the stabbed Kurn as his Cha'Dlch and now we get Patrick Stewart speaking Klingon. Beverly discovers that a Klingon woman survived the massacre too. Worf faces the accusations from Duras. Picard goes off to find the woman, she was Worf's nurse. She's old and reluctant to help, but says Mogh was no traitor. She won't help and Picard is attack by Duras's assassins. Picard stabs a Klingon(!) and the old lady saves him from another. She is impressed by Picard's bravery and goes with him to the High Council, just as K'mpect is about to find Mogh guilty. K'mpec reveals that it's Duras' dishonour that's being covered-up and Duras won't let the old lady speak in open council (there's also a funny bit where she calls K'mpec fat as he's had the hots for her for years.) K'mpec knew all along that it was the father of Duras who was the traitor, but he couldn't let the truth out because it would lead to civil war. He didn't think Worf would challenge the judgement. Picard wants the truth to come out, but Worf agrees to let the lies stand, for the Empire. Worf makes sure to slap down Duras anyway for being the son of a traitor. Picard tells Kurn to respect what Worf has done. Worf accepts Discommendation in open council, which means all the other Klingons turn their backs on him, including Kurn. It's a great ending scene. Worf is more of a Klingon than most of them.

Season 3 has really been expanding the universe of the show. It's done so with great success with the Romulans and now it does so again with the Klingons and it's possibly even better! This is Ron Moore's first Klingon episode (he combined two seperate stories by different writers into one scrip) and it's great. All the Klingon stuff is so interesting and alien! Tony Todd is one of Trek's greatest guest stars ever and is the perfect Klingon as Kurn (perhaps the only weak point of the episode is that he isn't in the second half of it after being stabbed but it's a small complaint.) It's an episode full of twists and turns too as at the start you think it's going to be a Klingon exchange episode and by the end it's Worf sacrificing his honour to stop a war. Look how much I wrote in the recap, so much happens but it all makes sense and flows brilliantly. Season 3 is reliably delivering classic Star Trek nearly every week now!

SCORE: 10/10
 
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Allegiance - Picard is abducted from his bed and replaced by an exact double. The real Picard ends up locked in a room with a Bolian Starfleet cadet and a cowardly alien guy. Fake Picard takes the Enterprise away from a scheduled meeting to visit a random pulsar. He tells Riker that he's going to be acting weird for a while. Real Picard tries to communicate with his captors using a control panel in the cell. The coward alien's people are famous for being conquered by other species and never resisting. A fourth prisoner shows up, a violent poor man's Klingon. Fake PIcard interrupts the poker game and acts a bit weird. He acts weird in a "Picard's being a bit weird!" way but in a particularly entertaining way. Warrior alien and pacifist alien predictably clash in a predictable way. The food in the room is poisonous to the warrior alien. He can only go three days without food. Lightweight. Fake Picard invites Crusher to dinner in his quarters. Real Picard and friends try to break out but are hit by a green light. Fake Picard asks Beverly if she'd sleep with him if he wasn't in command and they have a dance. Then he kicks her out.

Picard's fellow prisoners bicker over which one of them is an imposter. Fake Picard shows up in Ten Forward and orders "ales for everyone!" But they don't have to pay anyway so what's the point? Then he sings a song, which is the best part of the episode because it's Patrick Stewart singing a drinking song. The Enterprise arrives at the pulsar. Their shields will only hold for 18 minutes. Real Picard and friends nearly get out the door but find another door behind it. The old double door trick! Fake Picard nearly kills everyone but Riker belays the order. Remember when I didn't know "belay" was a different word from "delay"? Simpler times. Real Picard figures out that it's all a test on how different people react to authority and that the cadet is the imposter. She turns into three aliens! They're able to make exact replices, right down to the brain, but they still need to study leadership and authority. It's a bit strange, really. They send Picard home but he communicates non-verbally with his crew to trap them in a forcefield and give them a taste of their own medecine. He's showing them that you don't have to be telepathic to get things done! Or something. He sends them home after making them mildly uncomfortable. Beverly shows up on the Bridge and gives Picard the eye. THE END.

So this episode...it's not bad. It's also not that good. Picard singing is fun and the scene with Crusher in his quarters. The ending with him imprisoning the aliens is okay. Otherwise it's all meh. The scenes with real Picard in the cell are really standard stuff. It could have been a TOS episode, or worse, a Voyager episode. It's not a hatable episode but it's not going to be in anyone's top fifty (unless they're weird.)

SCORE: 6/10
 
Captain's Holiday - Some weird aliens show up on Risa looking for Captain Picard but he's not there. Picard has been serving as a mediator in gruelling trade disputes for the last two weeks. He's really tired. Troi tells Riker he needs a vacation and whimsical music plays. I like where this is going! Crusher goes to him and tells him that a crewmember is overworked and needs a break. She means him! But he won't go. Riker tells him about Risa but he still won't do it...and Troi tells him her mother is going to come onboard. Picard isn't fooled but decides to take the holiday so everyone will stop hassling him. Riker asks Picard to get a horga'hn for him. Picard runs into a hot woman right away who kisses him to avoid a Ferengi (Max Grodenchik, who will of course later play Rom.) We get to see Picard in speedos(!) as he reads a book while the young people have fun. Women keep coming onto him because he's displaying the horga'hn, a sexuality symbol. That Riker! This is all very fun until the Ferengi starts asking him about a disc or something. Max Grondenchik will go on to do good work in DS9 but he's not good here. His voice is annoying af. Picard meets the hot woman again (Vash played by Jennifer Hentrick...who hasn't done much else) and she smuggles the disc to him. The aliens from the teaser are Vorgons from the future who've travelled back in time to find Picard and a legendary weapon that can destroy stars. Vash wants her disc back but Picard won't give her it because it might lead to Starkiller Base. Vash worked for a famous dead archaeologist and we all know Picard is interested in archaeology so he agress to team up with her.

The Ferengi sticks them up and suggests that Vash is a thief and he's got the hots for her. Picard sticks with her anyone because she's hot. Picard and Vash camp out in a cave. They kiss and have cave sex (we assume.) The time travellers show up to witness Picard digging up the weapon. Why don't they just dig it up themselves? The Ferengi shows up with a bigger gun. This is all a bit lame. They keep digging but don't find the weapon. The aliens disappear and the Ferengi keeps digging himself. Doing some terrible acting. Picard tells Riker to prepare TRANSPORTER CODE 14. He works out that Vash fooled everyone and really did find the weapon, she left a false trail for the Ferengi to get him off her back. She had it hidden all along. The Vorgons show up and Picard's ready to hand it over but Vash says it was Vorgons who tried to steal it from the professor. He has Riker destroy it with the transporter. Picard and Vash have a kiss goodbye. Picard tells everyone he had a good time.

There's really good stuff in here. I enjoy the start a lot with the whole crew trying to gently force Picard into taking a holiday. It was really revolutionary at the time to see the Captain off duty (and without many clothes on.) Vash is a good character, well played by Jennifer Hetrick, and has a lot of chemistry with Picard. There's good comedy (mostly in the first half) and I just love that Riker tricked Picard into picking up a sex thing. But man the actual plot is terrible. I know you could say that it doesn't have to be good becaus it's a comedy episode, so they can get away with the plot being silly, but it's not silly in an entertaining way. It's just lame. The time travel aliens are really bad but the Ferengi is even worse. He's the worst Ferengi in Star Trek yet and that's saying a lot. The episode really runs out of steam after a strong start. I still like it though, mainly due to the fun of Picard and Vash's relationship.

SCORE: 7.5/10
 
Tin Man - The Enterprise is given a special passenger a Betazoid named Tam. Troi knows him too as he used to be her patient. It's Harry Groener who will go on to play the mayor in Buffy! He's a super telepath who can't stop reading people all the time. He messed up a first contact situation that got a bunch of officers killed, including some of Riker's friends, so Riker hates him. Some kind of living starship named Tin Man has been found and Starfleet want Tam to talk to it. The Romulans are after it too, which Tam forgot to mention. He snaps at Riker for thinking bad things about him. There's an exposition scene about Tam's super powers. Tam admits to Troi that maybe he got too involved with the aliens on the first contact mission so maybe it was his fault. He likes Data because he can't read his thoughts. He's already in contact with Tin Man. The Enterprise arrives just as a Romaul Warbird does. There's lots of tech talk with Geordi for some reason. Tam comes on to Data.

The Romulans try to talk to Tin Man so Tam warns it. Tin Man blows up the Romulans. Tam reveals that Tin Man is here because the star's going to explode and Tin Man (it has an alien name but I'm not going to look up how to spell it) wants to die. Tin Man had a crew once but they all died. More tech talk with Geordi and a guy named Russell. It's not very interesting. Troi fears that Tam will lose himself completely if he joins Tin Man. Data volunteers to go with Tam. More Romulans show up and they want to kill Tin Man for killing their friends. Data and Tam beam over to Tin Man. So the star's going to blow up, the Romulans are about to attack and Tam's getting all intimate with Tin Man. Then Tam and Tin Man go off together (I think?) and Data is beamed back and...that's it I guess. Data is happy that Tam has found peace.

It's all just a bit dull, isn't it? I appreciate the attempt at a more serious science fiction story but it feels lacking in urgency. The music is good, Harry Groener does a good job playing an unlikable character...but it kind of reminds me of a cross between The Motion Picture and 'Encounter at Farpoint'. It's disappointing to have the Romulans reduced to just being the thugs of the week after two great Romulan episodes. Tin Man as a character isn't enganging since it's just a big space whale thing and Tam has to keep telling us what it's feeling. There's a couple of really dull scenes with Geordi talking about tech stuff. I don't know, maybe it was down to the direction.

SCORE: 6.5/10
 
Hollow Pursuits - An officer named Barclay is hanging out in Ten Forward when he should be working. Guinan thinks he's trouble. He beats up Riker and Geordi. And Troi's all turned on! But it was all in the Holodeck! Geordi is complaining to Riker about the real Barclay. Wesley calls him Broccoli apparently. Wesley's a dick. Barclay is awkard and stutters a lot and isn't very good at his job. Geordi wans him kicked off the Enterprise, but Picard wants to give him a chance. He orders Geordi to make him his best friend. So Geordi starts calling him "Reg" and invites him to the engineering meeting. Barclay's investigating a problem with an anti-grav unit but Wesley keeps making him feel dumb. Barclay seemingly has a therapy session with Troi (where he says "flux capacitor!") but it's just another Holodeck sex thing! Data RIGHTLY points out that nicknames are supposed to show affection and they should stop saying "Broccoli" so much. Then someone's glass has a hole in it. Then Picard fucks up and says "Broccoli" and it's great. Geordi tells Guinan that Barclay doesn't fit in and she makes up a story about her uncle who didn't fit in but actually he was really cool, okay? Geordi discovers Barclay's Three Musketeers-like Holodeck fantasy involving real people. Geordi can finally relate to him since he created a real woman on the Holodeck once and fell in love with her. Barclay tells him a few personal things at last.

Barclay goes to a therapy session with the real Troi but he runs out because he's thinking of shagging her hologram. Barclay's late again so Riker, Geordi and Troi go to the Holodeck this time to get him. Troi thinks it's all harmless fun and is amused when a short version of Riker shows up. He is very tall! But then she sees the sex hologram version of herself and is less amused. "MUZZLE IT." The ship starts to break in a more serious way (it's lucky that when something goes wrong with the Enterprise it always starts off with a minor thing then builds up to the engines being about to explode, rathern than starting with the engines about to explode.) We nearly get a saucer seperation (remember that!) but Data says it can't happen. Barclay comes up with the idea that one of the engineers might have passed on whatever's responsible for the systems failing. They find the substance responsible (O'Brien was one of the people spreading it!) and solve the problem. So Barclay feels a bit better about himself now. Barclay makes a speech about how he's leaving, but it's too his Holodeck characters. He deletes all his programs...except number 9. Which we are left to assume is some fucked up sex program.

Reg Barclay is a very good character, superbly played by Dwight Schultz. The episode is a good character sturdy of a nervous, awkward, perhaps even Aspy guy and it's good that we're finally seeing flawed humans in TNG. Even Geordi and Wesley are allowed to be dicks a bit. I guess Gene didn't have as much control now. Does the episode really need a "the ship's malfunctioning and about to explode!" plot though? It's all a bit convenient how it gives Barclay a way to feel better about himself. But yeah this is good stuff, the Holodeck scenes are memorable and fun and Guinan is used well again.

SCORE: 8.5/10
 
He was always my favourite character on the A team, so it was a dream come true for me when he joined star trek.

At the time this episode was so well received there was talk of making him a regular, but certain members of the cast vetoed the idea,I guess they didn't want to be overshadowed.

At least we get to see him again a few more times.
 
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