Where is the Random Thread of Randomness stuff that doesn't belong in other threads thread?

[USUC]

My sister gave me a bottle of Peppermint Vanilla Swirl body lotion for Christmas. :\
Who would want to smell like a bad accident at Baskin Robbins???

PM me your address, Blackfoot. Maybe it will ward off the rapists when you go back to jail.

 

[Mirah]

Ugh, I hate the smell of that stuff. We had it in an office once and it was the only lotion there and whenever someone would put it on it was terrible. I finally threw it out and someone replaced it with a better smelling one.

 

[Volpone]

A Reputable Source on The Internet says it takes the human body 36 hours to convert food into poop.

 

[USUC]

A Reputable Source on The Internet says it takes the human body 36 hours to convert food into poop.

Blatant disinformation. I’ve seen the corn in my poops from the night before.

 

[Volpone]

Well it probably isn't an exact science and things move through at different rates. I could tell you what made me look it up, but I don't want to and no one here wants to know.

 

[The Question]

Blatant disinformation. I’ve seen the corn in my poops from the night before.

Improbable as it is, I find myself agreeing with USUC. I've tested this (because boredom) by eating a whole habanero pepper. From enjoyably spicy entrance to hellish burning exit was about 6 hours.

 

[Volpone]

Ah, the Ring of Fire. I will allow this as evidence.

 

[USUC]

Giggles and shits.

 

[Volpone]

Jesus. I almost elaborated on this all. I still try to pretend I'm not Old. But when you start telling people about your bowel movements, you are almost certainly Old. Or a character in "How I Met Your Mother." But that's another story.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Doctor Octopus does not have "eight arms" (or "eight hands" as Lucy Lawless put it.) Two of them are CLEARLY his legs. He has six "arms" and two legs and I hate anyone who says otherwise.

 

[whisky]

Getting a new toilet tomorrow, this is the world of being an adult.

I would have preferred a PS5 but they don't flush as well.

 

[Volpone]

Past the age of 40, "Fuck it, whatever" is the most useful phrase you can get comfortable with.

 

[Volpone]

David Bowie almost certainly did not wear underpants for the filming of "Labyrinth."

 

[USUC]

I started talking to my kids about sex when they were about 7 and never shut up. Probably over compensating for a lack of similar information in my youth but whatever. It was only an issue once when my daughter told another kid how babies are made who then freaked out and told the yard duty lady in second grade.
Fast forward my kids are now 22 and my son has a new girlfriend. As I said, I’ve never shut up so I told my son I hoped he was confident his girlfriend wouldn’t unexpectedly get pregnant. His response was “don’t worry mom, she has one of those things in her…an IED or whatever”.

I guess kids never stop saying weird shit.

 

[CaptainWacky]

I mean it would be a sure way to stop her getting pregnant.

 

[whisky]

The plumber couldn't change the toilet as we had the wrong sort of pipe.

 

[rancidmilko]

That's a hard one to hijack, Ahmed.

 

[Volpone]

"We're going to need a bigger toilet" gets more Google results than you'd think.

 

[CaptainWacky]

The plumber couldn't change the toilet as we had the wrong sort of pipe.

Did he offer to put his enormous tool in your box?

 

[whisky]

No, he had to drive a milk float at ten miles an hour.