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sex

classichummus

on a break from forums
I want sex. Sex sounds cool and I want it. I want a girlfriend. Being lonely sucks.:frown: Dual and I are in the same boat it sucks.
Thought y'all should knaw. Just 'cuz I'm kool like that! Ya dig? (guilt trip!! I'm so pathetic it's actually sad).
 
I want sex. Sex sounds cool and I want it. I want a girlfriend. Being lonely sucks.:frown: Dual and I are in the same boat it sucks.
Thought y'all should knaw. Just 'cuz I'm kool like that! Ya dig? (guilt trip!! I'm so pathetic it's actually sad).

No I'm sad and pathetic. I'm almost 36 and I haven't had sex.:(

(Seriously.:()
 
No I'm sad and pathetic. I'm almost 36 and I haven't had sex.:(

(Seriously.:()

Wow I'm really sorry. I think you actually deserve go to Nevada and find some of their legal brothels. I'm not quite at that point (I'm only 19), but I wouldn't doubt some day it will have to happen. I'm sorry.
 
Wow I'm really sorry. I think you actually deserve go to Nevada and find some of their legal brothels. I'm not quite at that point (I'm only 19), but I wouldn't doubt some day it will have to happen. I'm sorry.

I thought you seemed a bit young.
 
Doubt it. You such a handsome man/pretty boy. Not an ugly, fat man like me. Thanks for cheering me up anyway.

Change your ways. Ride a bike and/or walk every where when you need to go somewhere. Don't eat junk food, eat fruit and vegetables, don't drink soda, drink water, don't eat ice cream, eat sorbet (and only a little bit) eat cheerios instead of McDonalds McMuffin's. Don't eat domino's or any pizza.

(sorry I'm not sure of your habits but it might help.
 
Doubt it. You such a handsome man/pretty boy. Not an ugly, fat man like me. Thanks for cheering me up anyway.

Hey, I'm plenty ugly, and it's only a matter of time until my metabolism catches up with me. Besides, women (and men for that matter) are programmed to choose healthy mates to produce strong offspring, and the three of us most definitively missed out on that boat. Few things are less attractive than the mentally ill. ;)

Beyond that, I've got an awful personality and am completely impersonable. Realistically, the only way I see sex happening is in the far future, when I might have a remote, abstract chance of attracting a gold digging whore, but that's pretty awful itself.

Meh.
 
I want sex. Sex sounds cool and I want it. I want a girlfriend. Being lonely sucks.:frown: Dual and I are in the same boat it sucks.
Thought y'all should knaw. Just 'cuz I'm kool like that! Ya dig? (guilt trip!! I'm so pathetic it's actually sad).

I know how you feel. I haven't had any in 10 months, since my ex wife and I broke up. (We broke up a year ago, but we still occasionally had sex for a couple of months.)
 
Hey, I'm plenty ugly, and it's only a matter of time until my metabolism catches up with me. Besides, women (and men for that matter) are programmed to choose healthy mates to produce strong offspring, and the three of us most definitively missed out on that boat. Few things are less attractive than the mentally ill. ;)

Beyond that, I've got an awful personality and am completely impersonable. Realistically, the only way I see sex happening is in the far future, when I might have a remote, abstract chance of attracting a gold digging whore, but that's pretty awful itself.

Meh.

Well that cheered me up. Misery loves company.

Seriously though sometimes you seem more stable and organized than me that I forget for a moment of your mental illness and the horrors you went through.
 
Oh, what the hell is all this, then?

For fuck's sake, guys, turn off the computers and get the fuck out and MINGLE.
*First: you must employ proper hygiene tactics as part of your meeting-chicks-to-fuck strategy.
*Second: be POSITIVE. No whining. Be CHARMING. Not self-deprecating, god damnit.
*Third: lower your standards and drop the 'nice guy' routine.
*Fourth: you may need to consider copious amounts of alcohol liberally ingested by the female target in question.
*Fifth: find an older experienced woman (MILF... GILF?) who is lonely who wouldn't mind schooling a young man in the erotic arts.
*Sixth: Condoms are $.75 American when purchased from the men's room of the truck stop at the edge of town.
*Seventh: Be willing to spend a little coin. Whether on dinner and entertainment. On BINGO. Or for paying for the sex outright. (Believe me, you'll pay one way or another, anyway.)

NOW, BEGONE, AND FORNICATE!
 
Oh, what the hell is all this, then?

For fuck's sake, guys, turn off the computers and get the fuck out and MINGLE.
With who; where?

*First: you must employ proper hygiene tactics as part of your meeting-chicks-to-fuck strategy.
Done.
*Second: be POSITIVE. No whining. Be CHARMING. Not self-deprecating, god damnit.
I'm a realist. ;)
*Third: lower your standards and drop the 'nice guy' routine.
What if it's not a routine?
*Fourth: you may need to consider copious amounts of alcohol liberally ingested by the female target in question.
Easy enough, though I'll always be drinking more.
*Fifth: find an older experienced woman (MILF... GILF?) who is lonely who wouldn't mind schooling a young man in the erotic arts.
It's really the ILF part that becomes an issue.
 
I actually don't want to get laid.

If I did, I'd be out getting laid.

Instead, I'm on the fucking computer.

So that must be what I want.

1 1/4 year BTW, since everyone's counting...
 
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