Top Tens For 2012

[CaptainWacky]

#34

1) Scarlett Johansson - She's on the "Jewish actresses who rival Natalie Portman for the title of Hottest Jewish Actress" list. It's a short list.
2) Amanda Seyfried - I find her attractive!
3) Natalie Portman - The don't call her "Natalie Portman" for nothing.
4) Deborah Ann Woll - She's the beat vampire.
5) Gillian Jacobs - Her face is so good.
6) Kat Dennings - She is good in every way.
7) Olivia Wilde - I like her.
8) Kate Beckinsale - Had a good run on top!
9) Mary Elizabeth Winstead - Her face makes me feel happy.
10) Lucy Griffiths - I think I've slightly underrated her in the past.
11) Liane Balaban - She looks like Natalie Portman (played Anna in Alphas.)
12) Emma Willis - I really like her bone structure.
13) Laura Mennell - Would be higher if she wasn't verging on being slightly too thin.
14) Katie McGrath - UNDERRATED.
15) Michelle Trachtenberg - I'm still not back inside the Trachtenberg Context (but I like her.)
16) Kristina Anapau - True Blood really isn't short on hot actresses (just good writers.)
17) Tiffany Pisani - Has an umbrella.
18) Lauren Carre - I like her.
19) Rachel Nichols - Breasts.
20) Janina Gavankar - She's naked so often that I don't even notice it now.

 

[CaptainWacky]

#35

1) Natalie Portman - Who would have guessed that Natalie Portman, of all people, would be ranked number one on this list!?
2) Olivia Wilde - I find her very attractive.
3) Scarlett Johansson - She has the best bum.
4) Kate Beckinsale - I still find her hot. Sorry.
5) Kat Dennings - I like everything about her.
6) Deborah Ann Woll - Goodbye for another year?
7) Gillian Jacobs - Her face.
8) Amanda Seyfried - She is nice.
9) Lucy Griffiths - UNDERRATED!?
10) Summer Glau - Making a comeback!
11) Mary Elizabeth Winstead - I am a fan.
12) Michelle Ryan - Also making a comeback.
13) Laura Mennell - Cheekbones.
14) Moon Bloodgood - She is good.
15) Daisy Beaumont - Oh, why not.
16) Rachel Nichols - She is pretty.
17) Zoe Saldana - The hottest Uhura!?
18) Janina Gavankar - I hope she didn't die.
19) Michelle Trachtenberg - I like her more sometimes than other times.
20) Kristina Anapau - Her light broke.

 

[CaptainWacky]

#36

1) Jenna-Louise Coleman - More like Jenna-Louise Cutewoman!
2) Amanda Seyfried - She is pretty.
3) Scarlett Johansson - I find her attractive.
4) Mary Elizabeth Winstead - I now include her every week by default.
5) Kate Beckinsale - She is lovely.
6) Natalie Portman - I can't make her the permanent number one at ths time. But she's still Natalie.
7) Olivia Wilde - Her face is nice.
8) Deborah Ann Woll - I like this actress.
9) Karen Gillan - Och, no, I'm being overshadowed!
10) Gillian Jacobs - I love Gillian Jacobs.
11) Katie McGrath - UNDERRATED.
12) Jessica Biel - UNDERRATED.
13) Kat Dennings - Attractive Jewish lady.
14) Lucy Griffiths - I under rated her earlier this season on True Blood and need to balance it out (sorry for these boring autistic explanations.)
15) Hayley Atwell - Hot English lady.
16) Olivia Munn - Has breasts.
17) Moon Bloodgood - She's nice.
18) Laura Mennell - I like her.
19) Keira Knightley - Every time I think I'm through with her FOREVER she always makes a surprise comeback.
20) Alison Brie - I can't help compare her to Gillian Jacobs and it hurts her ranking a bit.

 

[CaptainWacky]

A confusing, chaotic, conflicting list of change this week.

#37

1) Natalie Portman - She is the best human being ever.
2) Gemma Arterton - I think she's probably the hottest English actress.
3) Scarlett Johansson - I liked how she was waving her fist in her political speech thing. Passion!
4) Jessica Biel - Seriously underrated (by me, in the past.)
5) Amanda Seyfried - She is prettier than PRETTY PETE.
6) Alice Levine - I appear to have decided to become obsessed with Alice right as her three month long tv show ended.
7) Olivia Wilde - I am a fan of this nice actress.
8) Gillian Jacobs - Hoo hoo.
9) Michelle Trachtenberg - Yes, really.
10) Olivia Munn - She's hot. Getting hotter maybe!
11) Rachel Nichols - She's good looking.
12) Keira Knightley - Keira Knightley is back. And it feels good.
13) Kat Dennings - BIG BREASTS.
14) Katie McGrath - She above.
15) Mary Elizabeth Winstead - Her choice of dresses hasn't been the best lately.
16) Azita Ghanizada - Good skirt this week.
17) Laura Mennell - Cheekbones.
18) Magda Apanowicz - OhMagda.com.
19) Karen Gillan - Going off her for some reason.
20) Kate Beckinsale - Gemma Arterton is better!

 

[Tisiphone]

I <3 Gemma.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Tell her to be in a good movie.

 

[CaptainWacky]

#38

1) Karen Gillan - Yes, last week was a blip. Have a number one ranking to make up for it! Nice hair.
2) Amanda Seyfried - She's working her way back to another number one ranking.
3) Scarlett Johansson - I've been feeling ScarJo Feelings lately.
4) Olivia Wilde - I think she's really hot.
5) Gemma Arterton - She's English and nice.
6) Natalie Portman - If she was a Star Trek captain she'd bee Natalie-Luc Portcard.
7) Keira Knightley - One of the best faces ever.
8) Liv Tyler - Turns out she's still hot!
9) Rachel Nichols - She's hot.
10) Laura Mennell - She still does the tit bounce walk.
11) Kat Dennings - I like her.
12) Hayley Atwell - Huge English breasts.
13) Katie McGrath - Huge Irish breasts.
14) Rooney Mara - She has delicate cheekbones.
15) Anna Popplewell - Good at poppling.
16) Olivia Munn - She is attractive.
17) Valentina Novakovic - She's nice okay.
18) Morena Baccarin - Hot.
19) Kathleen Munroe - I like her face. In Alphas. Sorry.
20) Mary Elizabeth Winstead - She looks a bit different latey?

 

[headvoid]

I subscribe to your Arterton position.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Maybe Hansel And Gretel: Witch Hunters will be the SURPRISE HIT of the winter.

 

[CaptainWacky]

#39

1) Olivia Wilde - How about a NEW PERMANENT NUMBER ONE, FOR REAL THIS TIME, then? Because that's what she is!
2) Michelle Trachtenberg - I have seen the light.
3) Kandyse McClure - Just add her to the main cast or give her and Summer Glau a "hot guest stars from Alphas" spin-off show.
4) Kat Dennings - I have come to the conclusion that she has gigantic breasts.
5) Charlize Theron - Back in list action!
6) Liv Tyler - I like her now. That's a thing.
7) Gillian Jacobs - She is lovelier than love.
8) Allison Mack - Looks really hot in Wilfred. There is life after Smallville!
9) Morena Baccarin - Second best Emmy breasts! (She is nice in other ways too.)
10) Keira Knightley - She's actually beautiful.
11) Amanda Seyfried - The nicest hair.
12) Gemma Arterton - I like her.
13) Olivia Munn - I don't want to keep writing "huge breasts" but...
14) Emilia Clarke - She is an ENGLISH ROSE.
15) Scarlett Johansson - So many other high performers this week that she's been knocked down.
16) Rose Byrne - Underrated.
17) Anna Chlumsky - She is nice!
18) Rooney Mara - Nice face.
19) Karen Gillan - Meh. Maybe last week was the blip.
20) Natalie Portman - Blonde Natalie isn't the optimum Natalie.

 

[CaptainWacky]

#40

WARNING: I have come unhinged this week.

1) Olivia Wilde - Yeah, I was right. She's the best one.
2) Scarlett Johansson - I like her FACE.
3) Amanda Seyfried - Imagine what her hair must feel like.
4) Gillian Jacobs - Look up "adorkable" in the dictionary and you'll see Gillian Jacobs. If you have my dictionary.
5) Charlize Theron - Look up "hot tall blonde woman" in the dictionary and yeah.
6) Liv Tyler - I like her VOICE.
7) Katie McGrath - Back this Saturday!
8) Laura Mennell - She is hot. She touches her own bum. Like the Cheeky Girls.
9) Kate Beckinsale - I can't stay mad at her (I never was.)
10) Emilia Clarke - She can date Seth MacFarlane if she wants OKAY, she's still nice.
11) Gemma Arterton - NOT Gemma FARTerton.
12) Kandyse McClure - Holdover from last week. Come back soon please.
13) Karen Gillan - She's way hotter than Billie Piper!
14) Magda Apanowicz - She REALLY needs to appear in more than just Twitpics.
15) Carly Rae Jepsen - Hey I thought I'd never rank you, and this is crazy, but I looked at some pics, and you have really nice legs maybe!
16) Kat Dennings - She has huge tits.
17) Maria Kanellis - Wrestling thing ignore.
18) Michelle Trachtenberg - I JUST DON'T KNOW OKAY SOMETIMES I LOOK AT HER AND FEEL TRACHTENFEELINGS BUT AM I JUST REMEMBERING THE TRACHTENOBESSION I ONCE PROGRAMMED MY MIND TO HAVE BECAUSE THEN I SEE HER FROM A DIFFERENT ANGLE AND DON'T FIND HER HOT (I HAVE TO BE HONEST HERE OKAY) AND HAVE ISSUES WITH CERTAIN THINGS BUT MAYBE THAT'S BECAUSE I LOOKED AT HER SO MUCH IN LIKE 2009 THAT IT BLEW A FUSE IN MY BRAIN THEN ALSO SHE HAS SOME INCREDIBLE FEATURES LIKE HER SKIN AND NOSE AND SOMETIMES I THINK "YEAH I COULD BE TRACHTENOBESSED AGAIN" BUT REALLY I THINK OTHER GIRLS ARE HOTTER AND SEXIER AND HAVE BETTER CHINS THIS WEEK ANYWAY COULD OBVIOUSLY CHANGE MY MIND ANYWAY IT'S NOT LIKE I'VE GIVEN THIS TOO MUCH THOUGHT OR ANYTHING REALLY WHY DO YOU CARE ABOUT MY OPINION WHEN I OBVIOUSLY HAVE INSANE ISSUES AND NO TOMTREK IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT IF SHE MOVES DOWN THE LIST IT'S ALL MY BRAIN.
19) Victoria Coren - The thinking man's "crumpet".
20) Lena Headey - No one can say "a bit of rape" like her.
21) Natalie Portman - Literally just noticed I didn't have Natalie on and decided to make it a once a year top 25 special since I've already broken the crazy barrier.
22) Keira Knightley - Her face.
23) Emma Watson - She seems to be saying "look at my tits" lately.
24) Morena Baccarin - More like Morena Baccarin!
25) Azita Ghanizada - She's not as hot as Nina.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Just saw some new Natalie pics that would have changed her ranking (for the better) BUT IT'S TOO LATE NOW.

IT'S ALL, ALL TOO LATE.

 

[The Tomtrek]

Yeah but you ranked her below Carly Rae Jepsen. That's like ranking Sabé over Padmé (wich you didn't do!).

 

[CaptainWacky]

The bangs are strategic.

 

[Tisiphone]

Oh Emma.

 

[CaptainWacky]

#41

1) Mila Kunis - It's that time of the year again when I suddenly remember Mila Kunis and think "hang on, what if she's the best girl!?" and give her a WELL DESERVED number one ranking!
2) Scarlett Johansson - I also like Scarlett Johansson.
3) Natalie Portman - She looks good on movie sets. And in movies.
4) Amanda Seyfried - I want to marry her hair.
5) Laura Mennell - She has never risen higher.
6) Katie McGrath - Not quite a vintage Morgana week yet, but the signs are good.
7) Olivia Wilde - Traditonal drop-off after several high rankings? Or something more sinister? (The first one.)
8) Gillian Jacobs - Probably one of the best faces in human history.
9) Krysten Ritter - She is tall with legs.
10) Kat Dennings - She is aKATractive (attractive.)
11) Mary Elizabeth Winstead - A welcome return.
12) Morena Baccarin - She is attractive.
13) Kate Beckinsale - She is hot.
14) Gemma Arterton - She is well English.
15) Rachel Riley - The thinking man's Rachel Riley.
16) Ellen Page - Remember Ellen Page? She's really cute.
17) Emma Watson - She has won me back around.
18) Jordy Lucas - Australian!
19) Keira Knightley - She's nice.
20) Michelle Trachtenberg - Happy birthday.

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

Ever since Mamma Mia, I think it should be a law that Amanda Seyfried's hair always be either wet or air-drying after a recent swim.

 

[CaptainWacky]

#42

1) Mary Elizabeth Winstead - I just find her very attractive and warm.
2) Mila Kunis - I liked the Esquire shoot.
3) Katie McGrath - She loves her dragon.
4) Amanda Seyfried - I want to swim through her hair.
5) Summer Glau - It is always good to see Summer Glau.
6) Gillian Jacobs - Her face is nicer than a kitten's face.
7) Laura Mennell - She's got a good Canadian face!
8) Rachel Riley - Wears good dresses.
9) Natalie Portman - She's nice!
10) Scarlett Johansson - I like her face.
11) Olivia Wilde - I like her cheekbones.
12) Kari Byron - A welcome return.
13) Gemma Arterton - Attractive English lady from England.
14) Lauren Cohan - Still looks nice even covered in zombie guts.
15) Morena Baccarin - The hot one from Firefly. Who isn't Summer Glau.
16) Christina Hendricks - The hot one from Firefly who isn't Summer Glau or Morena Baccarin.
17) Emma Watson - She's all breasts now.
18) Gwyneth Paltrow - She does a lot of good work for charitable causes.
19) Emilia Clarke - I like her.
20) Michelle Trachtenberg - Good skin.

Kind of a slow, flat week. Maybe not the best time to launch my new FEMALE CELEBRITY OF THE DAY TUMBLR but I've done it anyway.

 

[CaptainWacky]

#43

1) Natalie Portman - She is female perfection. No one comes close. This list is pretty much obsolete now.
2) Amanda Seyfried - I want to make a suit out of her hair and wear it every day.
3) Gillian Jacobs - I would marry her.
4) Mary Elizabeth Winstead - She is one of my favourites. OKAY.
5) Mila Kunis - She is hot.
6) Olivia Wilde - Making a comeback.
7) Dreama Walker - She walks in dreams. Being cute.
8) Summer Glau - Renew her.
9) Katie McGrath - Wasn't in Merlin this week. Was still Female Celebrity Of The Day on Saturday.
10) Rachel Riley - Curvy.
11) Lauren Cohan - The Walking Dead? More like The HOTTING Dead. Or something.
12) Liv Tyler - I have underrated her in the past.
13) Scarlett Johansson - She is nice.
14) Alison Brie - She is nice too!
15) Charlize Theron - She is hot.
16) Willa Holland - Tentative first ranking.
17) Krysten Ritter - Legs.
18) Laura Mennell - Good face.
19) Maria Kanellis - Wrestling thing ignore.
20) Kate Beckinsale - English.

Meanwhile over on my new FEMALE CELEBRITY OF THE DAY TUMBLR, Summer Glau has the most "notes" so far. Does that mean she's the most popular? Stay tuned!

 

[CaptainWacky]

#44

1) Kat Dennings - Sometimes I forget about Kat Denings, since she's in an awful sitcom which I'd never watch in ten million years, but then when I do think about her I generally think "hang on, isn't she a strong contender to be FEMALE PERFECTION!?"
2) Janet Montgomery - Should be in Merlin more often. Like every episode.
3) Alison Brie - I've been feeling slightly more Brie-y than Jacobs-y this week.
4) Natalie Portman - Those on-set pics are still in my head. And in my heart.
5) Dreama Walker - She is a lovely cake.
6) Amanda Seyfried - Her face is really nice.
7) Katie McGrath - Pale breasts.
8) Krysten Ritter - Sexy bus driver.
9) Mary Elizabeth Winstead - She is lovely.
10) Gillian Jacobs - Her face is also really nice.
11) Willa Holland - Okay, she's hot.
12) Kate Beckinsale - She is hottractive.
13) Emilia Clarke - She is lovely.
14) Victoria Coren - I'd solve her wall.
15) Scarlett Johansson - Lips.
16) Olivia Wilde - She is nice.
17) Tricia Helfer - She has large breasts. Sorry to be crude.
18) Anne Hathaway - It's time for Anne Hathaway to come in out of the cold.
19) Mila Kunis - She is hot.
20) Michelle Trachtenberg - Tights.

On FEMALE CELEBRITY OF THE DAY, female celebrities continue to be posted every day.